Lindsay Lohan in 3.1 Phillip Lim

Posted on March 19, 2013

There’s an entire segment of our upcoming book (which we’re sorry to keep mentioning, but we’re a couple weeks out from deadline and the thought of it pretty much consumes our days) that deals with how a celebrity should dress for a court appearance. No, really. We want to thank Lindsay personally for contributing so much material to those particular paragraphs.

Unfortunately, we think she’s violating some of the unspoken (but soon-to-be spoken) rules with this one:


Lindsay Lohan leaves the Airport Courthouse in Los Angeles in 3.1 Phillip Lim.

3.1 Phillip Lim Fall 2012 Collection/Model: Agata Danilova

3.1 Phillip Pre-Fall 2012 Collection/Model: Iris van Berne

When you’re a celeb in front of a judge – especially if this is not your first time at this particular judicial rodeo – then your first goal is to appear repentant. Your second goal is to appear humble. And you have to manage both these goals while still looking like a superstar because the front of the courthouse has roughly the same number of photographers as the Oscars and this may be the biggest boost your career’s gotten in years. Also, sometimes a little sparkle can help warm up a judge’s heart. So white, or some other pale non-color that denotes purity and cleanliness; absolutely. If you can pull it off without looking like you’re there to get married, go for it. But a star attempting to appear repentant shouldn’t show up in anything too fashion-y or too challenging for the judge, nor should she wear anything that gives off the whiff of being lent or gifted to her by a designer. That’s just plain tacky as shit.  Sheers are absolutely out of the question and SHEER PANTS are so far off-model that we hope the judge literally threw a book at her. We would have.

And the tragedy of it is, she probably thinks she dressed demurely and sensibly. Or maybe she thinks this is like a chic version of a prison jumpsuit or something and she was trying out some sort of reverse psychology move on the judge. Either way, it didn’t quite work.



[Photo Credit:,]

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  • FrayedMachine

    She looks like an upscale cult member. Just… wow.

  • I don’t think sheer churidar pyjamas are ever the answer. Certainly not for a court appearance.

  • nannypoo

    Wait. Let me think about this. A designer is actually willing to lend clothes to Lindsay Lohan for a court appearance?

    • schadenfreudelicious

      exactly, one would think Lindsay would either “forget” to return it or it would just require burning anyway….

    • charlotte

      Maybe the designer wasn’t willing to lend her the clothes, so she bought them…

      • Which is even more disturbing.

      • eowyn_of_rohan

        Yeah, Philip Lim is not exactly a struggling newcomer who needs his name out there; it’s more likely in my opinion that she (or someone else) purchased them for this occasion.

    • tereliz

      The outfit is too “old” to have been a loaner. And after the last dress she borrowed was returned with a ragged diy mullet hem, I doubt anyone in their right mind is going to loan her anything again.

  • Vickiefantastico

    I will be so happy when this whole sheer thing goes away. And I must admit, I will be so happy when this train wreck goes away. She needs help, both in the fashion sense and in the life sense.

  • eowyn_of_rohan

    Something tells me the designer poured himself a stiff drink (or 5) after seeing these pics.

  • charlotte

    I hope rehab will finally mark a turning point in her life.
    Perhaps the therapists will tell her that wearing white does not equal innocence.

    • This is going to be her umpteenth trip to rehab. Maybe this time it’ll stick.

      • H2olovngrl


        • formerlyAnon

          For everybody who’s made it out of the addiction cycle, there was the time that it (rehab, AA, Jesus, lengthy jail sentence detox, whatever) FINALLY took. Maybe this is hers. Who knows?

          • H2olovngrl

            Well, here is hoping, for her sake.

  • Ugh, so tired of looking at her. Why wont the media just quit already?

  • The black version would have been vastly more acceptable.

    • mary McCall

      Proving once again…Everything is relative.

  • teensmom99

    It’s a good thing that she wore this before the book went to press–because otherwise who would have thought of mentioning “try not to look horrible.” and sadly I think that she probably thinks that wearing borrowed clothes signals the bad shape she’s in financially rather than understanding that all it says is crazy privilege.

    • RebeccaKW

      I think maybe a line needs to be added that since your first goal is to appear repentant, having a smirk on your face as you stroll past the cameras isn’t the best idea.

      • MarTeaNi

        Oh I don’t know. It seemed to put a twinkle on her. One could even say she sparkled…

  • gabbilevy

    If you guys haven’t seen the photos of her from inside the courtroom– she was clearly high as a kite. It’s really sad.

    • mommyca

      oh gosh, she looked terrible! she should have kept her shades on 🙂

    • and wow. you made me google and wow.

  • Sobaika

    Can we agree as a society that it’s time to simply ignore her?

    • Thank you. I can no longer muster the energy to comment on her clothes, or her high jinks.

      • H2olovngrl

        HIGH jinks…heheheh…

    • RebeccaKW

      I’m actually worried we are going to see more of her. I heard that Charlie Sheen gave her money or something and I wondered ‘why?’ And then I saw a preview for Scary Movie V. Oh, no. LL is in it (along with CS). So I worry that we will be seeing her at some sort of movie premiere.

      • I read yesterday that she’s appearing on Sheen’s new show (I don’t even remember the name of it). The two of them together is a train wreck waiting to happen.

        • RebeccaKW

          I’m actually surprised (happily surprised, but still surprised) that we haven’t ALREADY had a train wreck with the 2 of them.

    • MilaXX

      Sadly she is a drama vortex so good or bad she makes the news. It is the only reason I can imagine that designers are willing to take the crap shoot of lending her clothes anymore.

      • Carrieanno

        She (and Sheen, as mentioned below) are living proof that there’s no such thing as bad publicity.

    • Lilyana_F

      Yes, please, can we?

    • schadenfreudelicious

      this, honestly there are times when i am in favour of a good old fashioned shunning….

      • 3boysful

        Actually, she needs a spanking.

        • schadenfreudelicious

          i’m afraid she might enjoy that too much…..

    • …as we all add to the social commentary. (guilty as charged)

    • Can I get an Amen up in here?

    • mike__tv

      preach. I doubt she’ll pull a Kirstin Dunst and sort her shit out.

    • Oh honey, absolutely. Consider her ignored, overlooked, forgotten even.

  • I kinda like it, but definitely not for a court appearance. Can we talk about the rabbit’s paw on her skeezy lawyer’s LV briefcase though? Just no.

    • charlotte


  • mommyca

    the one in black (from the first model picture) would have been way better…

    • My thoughts exactly. At least pick the ugly-yet-modest one.

    • 3boysful

      At least she didn’t pick orange!

  • “I wore a white mini-skirt to court. It’s ok though, I wore sheer pants with it!”

  • GorgeousThings

    I also find her lawyer’s big honkin’ LV briefcase offensive. If I were the judge I’d add an extra 2 years on any sentence just for that.

    • schadenfreudelicious

      and does he have a rabbit’s foot attached to it??..well, i suppose Lindsay needs all the luck she can get at this point…

      • eowyn_of_rohan

        That rabbit’s foot is hilarious. Like strewing fuzzy dice on the windshield of a Porsche.

        • Martha Deutsch

          this is exactly what i noticed, and totally agree. so funny.

      • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

        OMG he does. He does have a rabbit’s foot attached. Who the HELL pays that much for an attorney who needs a rabbit’s foot for luck in trial? Uh oh.

    • DebbieLovesShoes

      HELLO? Rabbit’s foot? I don’t know whether to laugh or… okay I’ll just laugh-snort. That’s just ridiculous.

    • notterriblybitter

      How much do you want to bet it’s counterfeit? And how about the Grecian formula hair? He looks like a character from an Elmore Leonard novel.

      • We don’t rip on the civilians here. Keep the comments restricted to Lindsay, please.

  • Why…would…you…wear that…to…I mean…c’mon!

    If this is the attention she wants then so be it. I still have hope for this girl (like I always say, if Drew and RDJ could persevere than so can Lindsay!) but she’s making it so hard for me to do so. Anywho, she’s looks wack. So not the time and place to wear an outfit like that.

    I’m done.

  • WittyCism

    TWO rosaries = Costume

  • ccinnc

    Interesting how much closer to her real age she looks when her eyes aren’t visible.

  • MilaXX

    She might have gotten away with the top if the pants weren’t sheer. Lilo has dressed better than this for court. Sadly she still manages to dress better going to court than she does on any catwalk.

  • I think this is the cleanest I’ve seen her in sometime though.

  • BuffaloBarbara

    When I was about eleven, I was a genie for Halloween. I made the genie pants out of a pair of sheer curtains. They looked better than this. And were, you know, a Halloween costume. Forget why would you wear this to court? Why would you wear it anywhere? (The top’s not bad, but sheer pants? Why, God, why?!?!)

  • Sheer pants and a rosary? Crackfuckingtastic.

    • MaryMitch

      Yeah, the rosary as jewelry is just offensive. But she’s probably too ignorant to know it’s a rosary.

  • lobsterlen

    Lindsey is wearing 2 rosaries around her neck! Is she expecting to be attacked by a vampire? Why does her hair always look dirty? Is it really that greasy and dirty? Check out her lawyer with Louis Vuitton bag with the white rabbits foot attached to it. He is going to need all the extra luck he can get representing her.

    • Melanie

      I’m not Catholic, but even I know rosaries aren’t jewelry.

  • I think the pink sleeves are possibly WORSE than the sheer/illusion netting epidemic. Why wear something – to a court appearance – that gives the impression of showing a lot of skin? This girl is moron.

  • Plus it makes her look broad in the beam.

  • On the plus side, she won’t be flashing her coochie at anyone.

    That’s something.

  • Jecca2244

    But are well known designers still really gifting/lending her their clothing? I can’t imagine that Philip Lim lent her this.

  • Carrieanno

    I imagine the simple answer is that she thinks the rules don’t apply to her.

  • MarTeaNi

    Some sparkle can warm a judges heart? SNRK. The judge maybe, but not the crowd.

    I also advise showing up ON TIME. FOR ONCE.

  • MarTeaNi

    Some sparkle can warm a judges heart? SNRK. The judge maybe, but not the crowd.

    I also advise showing up ON TIME. FOR ONCE.

  • BrooklynBomber

    That entire first picture just sums up everything that’s wrong with our superficiality-lovin’, celebrity obsessed culture. Yowza!

    • makeityourself

      You are absolutely right. I took one look at the people around her and said “what a freakshow.”

  • jetpackdino

    Let’s all just hope she never has kids.

  • bakingbarrister

    This is the thing – I’m an attorney, and I would never let my client go to court without first approving what he/she planned to wear. I get that she has money, but she’s also hired someone to help her get through the proceedings as painlessly as possible. If your clothes don’t scream I RESPECT THE COURT, then there will be pain involved.

    • Well-deserved pain, in Ms. Lohan’s case. How many times will it take until she kills someone with her irresponsible actions?

    • alyce1213

      That struck me as well. Her lawyer must be out of his mind.

    • 3boysful

      Plus, the slew of chains around her neck makes me think “Is one of those the one she (allegedly) stole?” Probably don’t want to be reminding the court of THAT.

  • JasmineAM

    At least her glitter bomb seconds after these pictures made her outfit look a bit better.

  • Erica_Vuitton

    Poll on who feels worse today? Coked out hung over “OMG are they really going to take away my wine for 90 days” Lindsay or “I will fire whoever allowed my clothes to be sold to her*cough*sugardaddy* cough* Philip Lim?

  • lizlemonglasses

    Rosaries are meant to be prayed, not worn! Catholic 101.

  • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

    Here’s an idea: No matter what you wear, DON’T SHOW UP A HALF AN HOUR LATE.

  • Ana_ragu

    Not one, but TWO crosses! This proves she is, uh, twice as pious??

  • Why even bother?

  • miagain

    winona ryder

  • LP

    Just wear a normal lady suit! It’s not hard! Go to Banana Republic or Ann Taylor and drop a couple hundo on a boring-ass suit and you’re good to go for court. They don’t sell sheer pants there, so it’s safe.

  • stubbornthoughts

    Go home Lindsay, you’re drunk.

    And take off those crosses. You need Jesus, but not twice around your neck.

  • The book, the book! News that it is moving forward brightens my day.

  • EEKstl

    I’m sure you’re right, and I am near breathless with anticipation for your book, but I was so transfixed by the Louis Vuitton briefcase with the rabbit’s foot that I could see little else.

  • I’m sorry, what? “Airport Courthouse?” I realize I don’t live in L.A., but uhhh, wha? Does it have a duty free shop?

  • She needs a Greek chorus behind her…”No sheer pants in court!”

  • formerlyAnon

    It’s all sad. She was a talented young actress once, can’t say what she is now except a sad cautionary tale.

    “It didn’t quite work”? Depends on one’s expectations, guess. But she’s had so much trouble not breaking her probation, I dunno. I think she got a fairly sweet deal. At least by non-celebrity standards.

  • Indigo54

    I’m not the least bit surprised that she word that thing to court. What I am surprised at is how bad it looks on her. Poor thing, I just don’t get it.

  • H2olovngrl

    Wow, her lawyer with the bad dye job and LV briefcase looks skeazy!

    • l_c_ann

      Nothing says “Most folks can’t afford me” like a LV briefcase.

      • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

        with a rabbit’s foot attached to it, as some person noticed earlier.

  • Trisha26

    As if I needed one, another reminder never to buy chiffon pants.

  • poggi

    Between Lohan and Biel we have the yin and yang of pants-but-not-really-pants and overly complicated skirt/tunic/jacket combinations. Since they can only both exist together, maybe we only have to burn one outfit to destroy both outfits.

  • This fails on every level as strategic dressing, but at least she looks better than she usually does. Sigh.

  • melissaisasnob

    She is getting the dreaded Xanax gut-puff. Not a good look.

  • Coco Cornejo

    Oh TLo, you didn’t mention the best part…she got glitter bombed on her way in.

  • JuliaInBlack

    If your goals in choosing clothes for a court appearance include the ability to covertly flash your hoohoo for the judge, this would be spot on.

  • What do you mean, not repentant? Did you not see the multiple rosaries??

  • editrixie

    I’m actually way more amused by her lawyer here. Not only does he look like a gargoyle you’d find on one of the courthouse buildings, but he’s carrying a Louis Vuitton case with a tacky little rabbit’s foot charm on it. WHUT.

    The two of them together are highlarious.

  • WWJD? He’d smack the shit out of her! I doubt Phillip Lim gave or loaned this to her. What designer in their right mind would want her trashing up their clothes? She probably got this off her entourage or one of her johns. The alcohol and drugs have officially fried her brain. This works in NO context.

  • Pterodactyl111

    But don’t you see her Rosary, TLo?? Surely excessive religious jewelry screams repentance!

  • Ah mah gahd her attorney has an LV briefcase. Now *that’s* tacky

  • libraangel

    Slutty Certified Nurses Assistant

  • When they start evaluating your Court outfits…….it is over.

  • Well I guess the lucky rabbit foot on her lawyer’s LV briefcase didn’t work.

  • Jana33

    As an attorney can I add that it makes a difference if she’s in front of a male or female judge. A male judge will cut her a lot more slack on her appearance. Agree with everything you mention but most important to any criminal defendant, Ms. Lohan included, is that they look like they recognize they’re in a court of law. That’s a ridiculous outfit, no attorney worth their salt would have allowed it. It didn’t appear she was listening to Mr. Heller but she seemed to be paying attention to her California counsel. This is going to end badly.

  • guest2visits

    I’m afraid this is just Lindsay Lohan dressing herself, and yes she thinks she did good.

  • kathrineb

    She is not good at dressing herself. I feel really sorry for her when I see what she has done to herself with plastic surgery. That photo of her lips on profile 🙁

  • ccm800

    stick a fork in her. She’s done. Seriously – lets stop watching this child jog to her early demise…it only contributes. Did we learn nothing with Anna Nichol?