Oh dear, cousin Matthew. The Dowager Countess would not approve.
‘Downton Abbey’ star Dan Stevens attends the 24th Annual GLAAD Media Awards in New York City.
But since she’s not real, you’ll have to deal with these two dowager queens.
Girl, what the FUCK are you thinking? Who is advising you right now? They should be publicly humiliated. Look, we were two of the very few people on the planet who felt like you were making a semi-decent career move by getting out of Downton Abbey before the quality declined further or your character was reduced to an animatronic device that spit out words like “chap” and phrases like “en deshabille” without sound like too much of an asshole. We got it; especially with the recent spin around the Broadway floorboards. An actor only gets so many chances and those windows tend to be very brief. Go for it, if you think you’ve got a shot.
But THIS. Honey, no. This is so laughably “I’m TOTALLY going to be big in Hollywood!” that we’re all kind of embarrassed for you. Ditch the crunchy hair and artful stubble, go back to blond, see if you can get a refund on that chin, and stop dressing like a bouncer at a strip club, mkay? THIS MAKES YOU LOOK NEITHER HOT NOR COOL. We can’t say it any plainer than that, son.
[Photo Credit: Jamie McCarthy, Larry Busacca/Getty Images]