We’re winding down our 2013 Oscars coverage darlings. What do you say we all go out with a bang of judgmentalism?
Allison Williams in Valentino
Pretty. It’s maybe a little too plain for an Oscar party, but she works these sorts of stark, socialite looks well. It’s her thing.
Amber Heard in Atelier Versace
Amber, on the other hand, likes herself a lot of dress. Or at least, a lot to look at. We’re not crazy about it. It’s too busy and too oily-shiny.
Amy Poehler in Hervé L. Leroux
We love the color on her, but that bodice has a stumpifying effect on her figure. Also, her hair’s a mess, her earrings don’t go, and she’s wearing dyed-to-match satin-y bridesmaid shoes. Oh, Amy.
Diane Kruger in Giambattista Valli Couture
We’re prepared to be the cheese that stands alone on this one, but we love it. It’s crazy and mod and different. After weeks of looking at stuffy awards season gowns, this is a breath of fresh air.
He looks good too, but the jacket’s just a skosh tight.
Elizabeth Banks in Alexander McQueen
Praise JESUS. COLOR. We didn’t realize how starved we were for it until we saw this dress. Love it. She looks amazing.
Ginnifer Goodwin in Monique Lhuillier
“Yes, America. I, Ginnifer-with-a-G-and-an-extra-I Goodwin, am here to give you all FACE and POISE and FASHION. Notice how my aggressive posing has forced you – FORCED YOU – to take in my Payless shoes, old Christmas wrapping dress, silent screen star makeup and oil spill hair with AWE and WONDER.
You are quite welcome.”
Hailee Steinfeld in Valentino
On the one hand, we suppose it’s age-appropriate in that Kool-Aid hair, scribbling-on-her-jeans-with-a-pen, angry 14-year-old pseudo goth way, but it’s kinda fug, from where we’re sitting.
Hilary Swank in Valentino
We want to know if she and Sally Field got into a fight.
Julie Bowen in Max Azria Atelier
We’d like it a lot more without that crap dancing across her hips.
Juliette Lewis in Vionnet
Are we nuts for loving this? Yes, it looks like a bedsheet a little bit, but it’s pretty and has a little drama to it.
Kate Beckinsale in Monique Lhuillier
It’s certainly an exuberant dress. We can practically hear the fireworks. But we’re not sure she can work a skirt shaped like that. Not when her hair is shaped the same way, that’s for sure.
Kate Bosworth in Giambattista Valli Couture
Kristin Chenoweth in Giorgio Armani
Bringing it, diva style.
We’re impressed that the proportions on this are so right. She’s tiny, so a big, dramatic detail like that doesn’t always work.
Marisa Tomei in Valentino
We like the idea of it more than the reality. Beaded pajamas at an Oscar party? FABULOUS. Greige, see-through beaded pajamas? Not so much.
Natalie Portman in Christian Dior
Interesting and beautiful.
She looks like a LOAD of laughs right now.
Olivia Munn in Atelier Versace
It’s a little strippertastic, but what the hell, it’s the Vanity Fair party, right? We’re just not crazy about the pink.
Rashida Jones in Vivienne Westwood
Rose Byrne in Lanvin
It’s like we always say: If you’re gonna wear a white dress to the Oscars, at least make it an interesting one.
We never say that. Not really.
Selena Gomez in Atelier Versace
Pretty enough. We like that it’s romantic but has that Versace edge to it. Just wish it wasn’t so washed out.
Vanessa Hudgens in Moschino
The melty boobs are freaking us out.
Zoe Saldana in Givenchy
Wow. We’ve seen Miss Zoe in a lot of different outfits over the years; some of which we loved, some of which we didn’t like at all. But this is the first time we’ve seen her in something we actively hated. This looks like cheap lingerie.
Zoeey Deschanel in Valentino
We really want to be supportive here, because this represents a seismic shift in Zooey’s red carpet style. On the other hand, the dress is colorless and her sad clown posing is making us VERY irritated right now.
[Photo Credit: Getty]