RuPaul’s Drag Race: Snatch a Fish

Posted on February 26, 2013

 

Frankly, we don’t even know why they bother with a mini-challenge during the Snatch Game episode. Everyone just wants to get to the main event.

 

Gratuitous.

 

We don’t know if it was because we were exhausted from roughly 18 hours of Oscar coverage in a 24-hour period (very likely) or what, but it took us a second to figure out what they were being asked to do. A cute idea, but it felt like the show rushed right past it to get to Snatch Game.

 

Another fun idea. They never once looked at each other, did they? We sense tension.

We got a chance to do a phone interview with non-Downtown Julie a while back and she was one of the friendliest people we ever interviewed. You would have thought she was on the phone with a long-time friend, the way she spoke to us. An utter doll.

 

It’s a shame LOGO ran screaming away from its gay programming, because a half-hour Snatch Game show with RPDR alums seems like a total no-brainer to us.

Of course, as with every Snatch Game, there are a handful of top performers – and then there’s everyone who embarrassed themselves.

 

GENIUS. Every single one of those queens who sneered at her should be embarrassed of themselves. Just because you never heard of someone doesn’t mean a whole hell of a lot, Coco.

 

She wasn’t bad – and she’s sure as hell suited for it – but she never seemed to take it anywhere.

 

We thought she was making a terrible mistake playing one of Ru’s best friends, but she was genuinely funny in a Lady Bunny kind of way, even if the voice was kind of odd. She’s a better performer than we originally thought.

 

HUGE disappointment. Detox is, unfortunately, not the performer we thought she was. We’re still fans and still think she’s a frontrunner, but this disappointing non-performance had us considering everything else she’s done so far and we can’t really point a moment where we thought “Wow!” She’s got looks, smarts, and attitude, but she hasn’t yet nailed anything down in this competition.

 

Another HUGE disappointment. She was certainly serving up Janet realness but she didn’t say or do one funny thing the entire time. Have these queens never seen the show? It’s not about looking like the person so much as it’s about making Ru laugh.

 

Awful An embarrassment.

But we have to admit, we didn’t like the way Jade and Coco went after her in the I.I. Lounge. Yes, Alyssa went after Coco in a “joking” manner that clearly wasn’t, and no, we’re not taking sides in this silly little staged feud, but that scene rubbed us the wrong way.

 

Resting on pretty. Frankly, she should’ve been in the bottom this week, but Ru always has a hard time being hard on the pretty girls.

 

Cringing.

Who are these queens who show up thinking they don’t need a routine?

 

We’ll give her credit for actually performing, but we had to laugh at her for rolling her eyes at Jinkx’s choice of Little Edie. Tamar Braxton may be more current, but you’d be lucky to find ten random people out of a hundred who knows who she is.

 

Um…

 

We didn’t like this look.

PLEASE DON’T STRIKE US DOWN, GOD.

 

Yawn. Like we said, resting on pretty. We were kind of outraged she wasn’t forced to lip synch for her life.

 

We were split on this look. Lorenzo loved it but Tom hated it. We didn’t think she should’ve been in the bottom, though. Ru likes to send a girl to the Lip Synch just to shake her out of her complacency, though. We’re going with that interpretation. Ru sees something in Detox but she can tell she’s not bringing it like she should, so she put a little of the fear of God into her. We’ll see if it works.

 

It’s good, but not all that interesting. Again: her greatest talent – aside from fishiness and stirring up shit – is her ability to change up her look.

 

We kinda loved this look. Yes, it’s another “look at my ass” look, but at least she doesn’t look like Lainie Kazan this week.

 

Awesome look. But we’re getting tired of her schtick of going after Alyssa with claws unsheathed and then rolling her eyes and acting like she finds the whole thing so tiresome.  Just own that you live for the drama, bitch.

 

We finally figured out who she looks like: Sue Ellen Ewing. She really should’ve skipped the Katy Perry drag and done Linda Gray drag.

Another “Real Housewives” look. Yawn.

 

MAJOR yawn. She’s pretty, but that’s all she’s got. At least Ivy has a little style to her.

 

Cute.

To be honest, we think Alaska needs to be getting the “you’re not glamorous enough” critique as much as Jinkx does.

 

But frankly, we think it’s a bullshit critique no matter who it’s leveled against, especially since, as in the cases of Jinkx and Alaska, they have a persona and some actual talent to back it up. “Glamour” just isn’t the be-all and end-all of drag, even if RPDR says so.

Having said that, this really is an unfortunate look for her. But her Little Edie more than made up for and she got a well-deserved win and the right to tell her competitors to eat her shit, please.

 

So it was down to Detox and Lynesha for the lip synch. Everyone watching knew how this was going to go …

… and when we all realized it was a Cher song, we flipped off our TVs, knowing Detox had it in the bag. Seriously, Ru basically just handed that to her and said “Do right, and remember what I said.”

 

 

 

[Stills: tomandlorenzo.com]

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