RPDR S5E2: Loose Lip Synch Ships!

Posted on February 05, 2013

This was a fun and funny cha– Jesus Christ, is that thing on the right real?

 

Only Ru. Where else can you find quality television like this? We were talking about it this morning (as we are wont to do) and it’s interesting to us that, as gay people become more and more assimilated, both socially and legally, “gay culture” is diminishing in … we don’t want to say “importance” so much as “potency.” This is why this show is so important to us. It’s a double espresso shot of classic gay male sass, lingo, and humor; completely tasteless and utterly hilarious.

 

Sensational.

 

Superstar.

 

Kind of an interesting take on the guest judge gig. Girl was HARSH, but she really looked at things from a performer’s perspective. It’s as close as the show’s ever gotten to having a real, honest-to-god artist’s crit.

Plus it was HILAR that she and Michelle Visage hated each other.

 

Have loved her forever.

 

So congrats to Lineysha Sparks! One might leap to the conclusion that the prettiest of the girls is being fast-tracked to the finals, but we have to say, this win was well-earned.

Because her performance in the lip synch as Tyra was freaking hilarious. If she’s got comedy chops to go with her looks, she’s definitely the one to beat.

The lip synch turned out to be funnier than the long setup would’ve had us believe. The rehearsals were painful to watch – and to be fair, so were some of the performances – but a few of them really nailed their characters.

 

We just … don’t get it. How does this cute, skinny brown boy manage to turn himself into a tacky, middle-aged white woman? Ru and crew seem to like her, but she’s just not setting us on fire with her style.

 

Props for the stilt-walk and sense of showmanship, but she’s resting on pretty too much. There’s no “Ivy Winters” character, so far as we can see. And this is a season bursting at the seams with characters.

 

Bland. Another one resting on pretty.

 

Her face-giving is AWFUL. Still, she definitely knows how to make an impression and keep all eyes on her.

And speaking of making an impression…

 

Her Shangela was downright eerie. Looked and acted exactly like her.

 

We’re with Kristen. What the FUCK is that sad little cocktail flag? The outfit’s just a sad take on a Miss Universe costume.

But the real story here is that Serena’s one mouthy, full-of-herself bitch. The shade-throwing sometimes gets a little tiresome on Untucked, but that scene of all the queens pretty much descending on her en masse and shutting her up was a thing of beauty.

 

She’s way more versatile in her looks than we originally thought she’d be. She’s a troublemaker, though.

 

Is this the only thing she does? This Lainie Kazan drag? Because we’re at week two and it’s already gotten old.

 

We love Jinkx, but her face and hair look truly frightening here. We can’t quite tell if it’s deliberate or not. Either way, this look felt half-assed.

 

Of course, the big moment of the night was Monica’s. We have to admit, cynical bitches that we are, our first impulse was to treat it like the soap opera storyline it was. Her fear seemed more than a little over the top, considering her mother apparently knows and accepts that she’s transgender and that she’s … y’know, in a drag queen competition; probably one of the safest places for a transgender person to come out. Unless she feared that her admission would get her released from the competition and we’re kind of wondering where the rules fall on that ourselves. After all, if a contestant is taking hormones and may have had surgery, doesn’t that kind of give them an advantage in a competition centered on men looking like women?

Anyway, the look is just okay. With this apparent weight off her shoulders, she needs to start kicking it up a notch.

 

Her turn as Phi Phi was pretty good – and obviously a bit of payback on behalf of her husband – but aside from that, we’re less than impressed with Alaska. She’s a lot of (admittedly funny) sarcasm with not a lot of impact in her looks or performances.

 

Coco, on the other hand, continues to impress. She’s the full package of looks, performing, and attitude. If they do Snatch Game this season, we hope she decides to be Janet Jackson. She’s got the face for it.

 

We like Detox a lot, both the attitude and the level of polish and skill. But she’s another one who needs to step up her look a little bit. This is good, but just good.

 

Anyway, the LSFYL came down to Snotty Babybitch vs. Soulful Confession and let’s face it, everyone there knew how it was going to shake out before the first note even sounded.

 

Well, everyone except one, that is. She went out the door as delusional as when she walked in, bless her.

 

 

[Stills: tomandlorenzo.com]

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