Mary Elizabeth Winstead in Emilio Pucci

Posted on February 27, 2013

It’s funny. Both these pictures and the pictures of Kerry Washington at the same event looked great to us in thumbnails. In both cases, we downloaded the pics, opened them up, and then sat there in silence for a moment until one of us muttered, “Houston, we have a problem.”

Seriously. This looked so pretty in a picture no bigger than a postage stamp:

Mary Elizabeth Winstead attends the 2013 Film Independent Spirit Awards in an Emilio Pucci dress paired with a Thale Blanc clutch, a Kimberly McDonald ring, and Greymer shoes.

Every once in a while, a lady star will make a public appearance looking so off-model from her normal self that we wonder if she hired an impersonator to fill in for her or if she hit her head really hard. MEW’s thing is always lady-like chic, bordering on precious at times. Matchy and floral and pretty. But THIS. We can’t EVEN. We don’t like to make rules, but here’s one for you: shoulder cutouts NEVER look classy. EVER.

We reserve the right to change our minds the next time someone wears shoulder cutouts, of course. Such is the world of fashion, darlings.

Also: We are completely flummoxed as to why she’s sporting the shoes all single-lady grade school teachers wore in 1977. We have no idea how one looks at that dress and thinks those shoes are the right choice. Then again, we have no idea how one looks at that dress and then finds oneself wearing it.

Are we being unclear here? What we’re trying to say is, we don’t like this look.

 

 

[Photo Credit: Andrew Evans, David Gabber, Emiley Schweich/PRPhotos]

    • Sobaika

      She looks flat out terrible, which is hilarious considering her pleased-with-myself expression.

      • MilaXX

         I swear some days it feels like the uglier the outfit, the bigger the pleased-with-myself expression.

        • AthenaJ

          “I’m wearing something completely unique and different!”

          And ugly, honey!

      • http://frankbettecenter.org/ sleah_in_norcal

        she’s smiling ’cause she knows her butt looks cute.

    • MissAnnieRN

      I don’t know who she is, but she and Lady Mary should play sisters in something.  Also, I appreciate the fact that she has goosebumps on her legs.  Stars – they’re just like us!

      But this is a record scratch of a look.  Though I do appreciate the color of the clutch as it relates to the dress.  But my appreciation stops at goosebumps and clutch coordination.

      • Lilithcat

        I appreciate the fact that she has goosebumps on her legs.

        Yet another reason one should wear hosiery.

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=610791985 Aniela Marie Perry

          It’s against the law to wear hosiery in Los Angeles. Unless you’re 80+ or Zooey Deschanel, and well… we don’t need to say any more about that.

          • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

            I think Cathy Cambridge has made it OK to wear hosiery again and that we, as a nation and friend of England, should encourage this trend.

    • aeb1986

      Colors look nice on her…that is all. That dress reminds me of Cinderella after her dress is torn to shreds and her carriage turns into a pumpkin.

    • procrastinatrice

      Sorry to make this classy comment, but here it goes: “That is a damn fine ass ma’am.” What I mean is that the dress is actually flattering from the back. The shoes baffle me however.

      • paginatrix

         Maybe she wore it for that reason alone.

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1208138556 Sara Munoz Munoz

          I would!

        • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

          Or maybe she lost a bet.

      • MissAnnieRN

        I thought the same thing – though there are many dresses to flatter thy ass, doesn’t have to be ugly to highlight the derreire

        • procrastinatrice

          Of course. my point was merely that it had at least that going for it.  That said, I don’t think the dress is horrendous, especially from afar. When you notice that the fabric is that of old and torn cotton sheet, then you know that something is wrong…

          • Comus

            It’s a Monet …

            • procrastinatrice

              Oh wow, really? Which painting? I don’t know one that looks quite the same, but I am not an art historian, not by a long stretch. Not that I think “It’s a Monet” now, frayed shoulder cutouts and all…

          • Comus

            Just a Clueless reference.

      • http://profile.yahoo.com/DNWEFT2SVBX5T3NPMROQCT4U2U jennyv

        I agree. From the front I was like, oh no!! But from that back I thought, Oh alright then. Go on wit yo bad self, girl! ;)

    • Reneesance

      Ouch, apparently it’s 1992 all over again.  I was so glad to see the open shoulder thing go away….

      • Vlasta Bubinka

        Shoulder cut outs– basically one the assiest trends ever. Three legged jeans make as much sense.  So Lady Miss Lady is working shoulder cut outs and Payless Shoes. Hollywood, finding fresh ways to emphasize the assy in classy everyday!

    • BuffaloBarbara

      I think there are ways shoulder cut-outs could be done in a good way.  This is not one of them.  This looks like she got into a fight with her cat on the way out the door and didn’t have time to change.

      Are those shoes actually vinyl, or did they just do something really disturbing to leather?

      • NinaBoo

        I swear my mom had shelf-liner paper that looked exactly like this. That was in the ’80s…

      • kimmeister

        These particular shoulder cutouts just look like the seams ripped.

    • schadenfreudelicious

      yup, wore those shoes in the 10th grade, circa, 1977….

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1447060898 Lori Wade Miller

      RAGGEDY shoulder cutouts.  No.

    • http://www.facebook.com/theatrecampe Shannon Campe

      It looks like she stretched her arms and ripped the sleeves. I’m not a fan.

    • SewingSiren

      The dress is cute enough, but the shoes! Fake vinyl Cherokee’s from Payless (circa 1981).

      • formerlyAnon

        Fake Cherokees! Like fake Hushpuppies, only faker looking!

        Blast from the past, for sure.

    • MilaXX

      I like the clutch.

    • StellaZafella

      Abysmal Project Runway entries have not lowered my expectations enough to accept this as appropriate day wear…I can’t even say how to fix it, or why anyone would bother. It looks like a mock-up of a bad idea, only instead of muslin the ‘designer’ grabbed an ugly bed sheet.

    • eowyn_of_rohan

      It looks as if it’s made from paint-splattered jeans.  Jackson Pollock couture!

    • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

      Atrocious print, horrendous fit, and a choice of textile for that design shape that is incomprehensible. It all adds up to a huge mess.

      • http://twitter.com/foodycatAlicia foodycatAlicia

         I love the print! I have a soft spot for spending days swirling ink and oil in trays and getting soggy paper all over the house. But agree about the fit etc.

        • http://twitter.com/Twitchlet Cat

           Me too! That’s actually what I’m doing today. :D

      • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

        LOL, but what do you REALLY think?  :)

      • lovelyivy

         That print looks like lab samples in a petri dish, or pictures of bacteria under a microscope. Just dreadful. Cancels the great things the dress does for her butt.

    • teensmom99

      I actually like the shoes . . . but they do make you look at her leg color (since you notice all the different beiges and then you can’t help noticing that her legs are tanned but her face and shoulders are pale.  Not a good idea.
      As to shoulder cutouts–my teen was all into them LAST YEAR!

      • RebeccaKW

         I kind of like the shoes, too, but I don’t think they work here.  Well, I can’t imagine what would work with that dress, but these shoes seem kind of a casual look.  She needs to wear them with a sundress to lunch in June.

      • l_c_ann

        Anybody remember what year Donna Karen did the black dress with the shoulder cut outs that was worn to death everywhere?

        • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

          Late 80’s or early 90’s – about the same time “Murphy Brown” was first on the air.

    • SugarSnap108

      When I was in college, we had a futon cover very similar to this material — with rips that were eerily similar to the shoulder cut-outs in this dress.  I can’t believe she’d voluntarily wear this.

      • mhleta

        And when someone barfed beer and pizza on it it looked just like this, yes?

    • Judy_J

      Awful, just awful.  Those shoes are beyond hideous.

    • http://www.snoskred.org/ Snoskred

      EGADS those shoes! 

    • Lilithcat

      shoulder cutouts NEVER look classy. EVER.  

      Particularly when they look ripped out, rather than cut out.

      Also the sleeves are too long and the shoes are atrocious.  You insult all single-lady grade school teachers when you suggest they’d have worn those.

      The fabric is lovely.  I adore marbling.  However, a little goes a long way.  You don’t want to look like endpapers!

      • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

        And,….the tiny frills of organdy at the shoulder cut outs don’t help matters. Plus, it is a very rare thing when a small scale pattern of this sort looks well when its draped.  It ends up looking overwrought and wrinkly.

    • alyce1213

      FRAYED shoulder cutouts yet.  And where is that slit?  What is it doing?  
      I can see why this might have looked cute in postage stamp size — bright, cheery blue, nice shape, good proportion.  But no details.  In this case, the devil is in the details.

    • Monkey Toe

      The shoulder cutouts are bad, but who wants those weird top of boob to armpit wrinkles?

    • Squarah

      Hah, I will admit with no shame that I love this and would wear all of it. My only possible quibble is that I think the purse and shoes kinda clash with each other.

      I have a similar pair of shoes and always get compliments when I wear them, but I wasn’t alive in 1977 so there’s no such association for me.

      • sweetestsith

        I also love this, minus the shoulder cut outs. I’m not sure I would have put those shoes with the dress, but I like the clutch with it. The print is weird (I dig pretty-ugly sometimes), but the colors are fun in and the shape (minus the cutouts) is classy.

        Also, girl has nice legs.

    • formerlyAnon

      This is actually a classic “look at” and then wear dress. Skipping the “try on and look in a mirror” step. 
      There’s just no point in belaboring the 3-4 terrible features and 2-3 seriously questionable features of this dress.

    • Annabelle Archer

      Wrong from head to toes.  That’s a go home and let’s never speak of this moment again, if I ever saw one. 

    • mhleta

      The fabric/print looks like puked-on kiddie PJs–Bed, Barf and Beyond.

    • Trisha26

      I like a platform shoe, but not these. That dress is absolutely hein.

    • RescueMe23

      Now that’s a hot mess right there!

    • another_laura

      I can totally see how this might have looked cute in a 1 x 2 inch size.  But the shreddy details and ouch, the shoulder cutouts and when you get close the print isn’t even that pretty.  The shoes leave me speechless.

    • Eva_baby

      For a second i thought this was Rumer Willis.  

    • http://www.facebook.com/bearaymond Raymond Boyer

      Lacy Shoulder Vaginas aside, I like the shape of the dress and the marbled paper print and colors.  Love the pop of orange in the clutch. And yes those shoes are a crime.  Mostly is looks like every time she puts her hand on her hip she twists the dress around her. maybe stand up and pose like a lady….

    • Monday1900

      I blame the prints–that looks like a blown up microscope slide of some virus.  Also, spot on about the shoes.  Miss Stone had a pair exactly like that in 1977 when I was in grade school.

    • Zippypie

      As I saw the shoulder cutouts, I exclaimed “EW!” out loud.

      Then I scrolled down to the slit “EW! EW!”  Then those hoofs “EW!EW!EW!EW!EW!”

      Thanks, boys.  Glad I have coffee next to me. *shudder*

    • Rand Ortega

      Never liked shoulder cut-outs. They always look like someone tried to rip the sleeves off & failed. Hate the accessories. The shoes & bag don’t have to match exactly, but at least follow a similar theme. The clutch is rather dressy whereas those shoes are too casual for dinner, let alone a Hollywood event.
      God, those shoes are awful.

    • Karen Dickerson

      I think the whole look would be more acceptable had she worn a belt and some different shoes. Definitely needs something in the middle to break up that print. 

    • In_Stitches

      Totally agree on shoulder cut-outs.  They just look trashy…and even if that’s the goal, there are more attractive ways to look trashy.  The shoes don’t bother me.  With the somewhat undone hair and the bright print on the dress, the whole thing has a fairly casual vibe that the shoes fit.  It’s like a celebrity interpretation of beach-wear.  But then, she’s at an award show…still, it doesn’t bother me.  Maybe I’m just distracted by how pretty/shiny her hair is.

    • http://twitter.com/PhDKnitter marlie

      Totally agree with Daddy and Daddie. And I hate this dress the more I look at it. 

    • l_c_ann

      But these shoulder cut outs take a worst of the worst designation.  What ever they chose to edge the cut outs looks for all the world like fabric frayed by not fitting well.  As if she busted out of ther dress because the dress was made badly. 

      The fabric is such that I wonder if any print can ever look good.  This just looks like a large bolt of cloth that was put away sloopy.

    • barbarienne

      It doesn’t help that the dress is a touch on the large side. The gathers aren’t working for her. I hate gathers on a print like this–they don’t stand out enough to look deliberate; they aren’t hidden enough to become secret structure. A dress should not be camouflage for itself.

    • jw_ny

       No…you’re quite clear!  :) 

      I don’t like this look either.   I look at it and think it’s a cross between Mod and Honkytonk.  The mod from the color and splatter paint effect, and the honkytonk from the back & cut-outs with the frayed edges and shoes.  Why is the slit and hem not frayed…did the designer think that’d be too much?  (lol…rhetorical!)  That draping just gets lost in the pattern too.  It’s an odd dress.

    • Imasewsure

      Hideous shoes. Cut the arms off of this mess of a dress and we have something to work with though… still don’t know who she is (and am too lazy to Wiki the knowledge)… oh well….

    • http://twitter.com/lisledanielle Danielle Lisle

      AWFUL.

    • ThaliaMenninger

      Hiddy all over.

    • BrooklynBomber

      The exposed “torn” shoulder stuffing is hilarious.

    • Indigo54

      I like it (said in a quiet whisper with head down hoping to be heard but not seen). 

    • Alyssa

      Shoulder cutouts (especially these ones) just look silly to me. Although I think her hair & makeup look lovely here, so at least she has that!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1245406754 Tracey Magyar

      The dress fabric looks like paper that got all stiff after kids fingerpainted on it. So, I’m imagining that it is super scratchy and uncomfortable. But, I’m sure that it is not. Just can’t get the feeling out of my skull.

    • cabbagericepuddingmutton

      Does she have it on backwards?

      • kimmeister

        Ha, the front fits so badly it almost looks that way, but the back is so wide open her boobs would totally be hanging out if she turned it the other way.

    • DiverK

      I love the print of the material, but with a print that busy the design of the dress needed to be classic, not torn and folded.  And those shoes: Just say No!
       

    • VioletFem

      Shoulder cut outs are bad enough, but ripped shoulder cut-outs are practically offensive. 

    • appliquer

      yuck

    • http://www.facebook.com/aboutelle Ashleigh Boutelle

      Bad bed sheets from the 80’s should only be used as drop clothes when painting…

    • http://frankbettecenter.org/ sleah_in_norcal

      either the skirt is twisted around to her right, or that’s a mighty strange place for a slit/vent.

    • http://twitter.com/MajorBedhead MajorBedhead

      Those shoulders. Who thought that shredding them was a good idea? I can’t see anything else. 

    • tylka5

      TLO have I told you lately how much I love you?  Every word made me giggle.  Silly dress, bad shoes. Poor thing.

    • Qitkat

      The watery blue pattern looks like a marbled end paper in a beautiful handmade leather-bound book. If I could find that fabric, I would make the book and a matching outfit.

    • lalahartma

      Nice butt, but the rest is awful.

    • Tr16ia

      I’m confused.  It’s like someone took my nana’s housedress and slutted it up.   

    • decormaven

      Didn’t Sheila E wear this back in the day? 

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F73LIJ3SJGI5AJQMXMWXCKILHI Pamela

      I like the material, just not what they did with it.  And the shoes look like Payless.

    • Call me Bee

      Yes you are clear.  Clearly–this is an awful look. 
      (But then–there has never been, norwill there ever be, a time when I think cut-out shoulders look good.  Ever.) 

    • LaSylphide

      There is nothing right about this. And if I see cutout shoulders one more time…KABOOM. I’m going to blow something up. Probably just a balloon so I can stick a pin in it, but you get the drift.

    • libraangel

      Scrubbing bubbles. And I still don’t know who she is. And yes, I did have shoes like that in 1977, only mine looked good with the rest of my clothes.

    • traceyishere

      Needs only one word to describe. Cheap.

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      I really don’t want to believe this is Pucci.  Are we sure she didn’t sew this dress herself?

    • RL McGruder

      She looks GREAT from the back.  And, because my formative years *were* the 70s, I love those shoes (but not with that dress).

      I can NEVER with shoulder cutouts.

    • quiltrx

      I don’t mind the shoulder cutouts so much as the EYE-TWITCHING CENTER SEAM.

      And yes, those totally look like Mushrooms shoes of the late 70s/early 80s, except not as comfortable.

    • Susie K

      I like the clutch, at least …

    • RzYoung

      ‘orrible. I much preferred her with a fringe/bangs, she’s got such nice shiny hair and they really gave her face character.

    • peachy

      could you reduce these photos back to postage size, s’il vous plait? the big ones are making my head hurt.

    • kathryn_dc

      Yikes.

    • Adriana_Paula

      Those are totally the shoes Miss Freedman wore in 4th grade homeroom!  But with bellbottoms, ’cause she was cool.

    • jetpackdino

      The instant I saw that print close up, “Under the Sea” from The Little Mermaid started playing in my head.  

    • guest2visits

      Just when I thought shoulder cut-outs couldn’t be any trashier, or completely foolish looking….

    • http://profiles.google.com/sauchih Sau-Chih Feng

      Has anyone made the Monet comment yet? No?

      She’s a total Monet.

    • ccm800

      I LOVE LOVE LOVE those shoes!!!!!!! Nothing else. 

    • kathrineb

      Dislike the print.