Girl, That’s Not Your Dress: Vanessa Hudgens

Posted on February 19, 2013

While it’s true that quite a bit of this look could be rehabilitated by making different style choices…


Vanessa Hudgens attends the premiere of ‘Spring Breakers’ in Paris in a Rafael Cennamo rosette embellished strapless dress.

Rafael Cennamo Spring 2013 Collection

Like different hair, shoes and ugh…NAILS. We’ve largely kept out of the discussion on the pointy, Pinterest nail trend (assuming there’s a discussion happening somewhere), but we can stay silent no longer. These gals are all going to look back on pictures of their overpainted claws no more than a handful of years from now and think “Oh, GOD. What was I thinking with those nails?”

Anyway, our point is, yes, she made some styling choices that seem to us to be a bit problematic, but even so, she’s too tiny to make the volume on this dress work for her. Box it up and send it off to some tall, lanky starlet, hon. It’s just not yours.


[Photo Credit: Getty,]

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  • Susan Collier

    Ew. Too much fabric. Also her bra is showing.

    • 3boysful

       Points for wearing a bra?

  • you’re right, everything about this is just plain wrong and those talon-y nails are hideous.  Maybe a belt and a shorter length would have helped a bit…but only a bit.

    •  I think it needs a different waistline for her, not even a belt would help it on someone so tiny.

  • I’d like to see Mia Wasikowska try this.

  • I don’t get this girl. She’ll always be an overdressed 12 year old to me. 

  • Tatiana Luján

    I think this dress is hideous, as if it were made by Angela Keslar, from Project Runway.
    The styling is hideous as well.

    • Stubenville

      Perhaps she’s going to Jubilee Jumbles after?

      • Vlasta Bubinka

        I keep think there’s a Sans-cullotte v. Jacobin party at the strip club.

    • Angela_the_Librarian

       Oh NO! Fleurchons!

      • Vlasta Bubinka

        Where’s Pattycake when you need her to shred a dress?

  • jmorino08

    I’m just surprised to see her working the sex-pot angle so hard. Those baby heads and that hair are vintage Pamela Anderson. Let’s no go back to there, K?

    • 3boysful

       Oooh, you nailed it with the Pam Anderson reference.  As styled–ick.  I would prefer the dress in the original colorway on, as TLo noted, a person tall enough to handle the volume.

  • Excepting the nails, I think she looks great. 

  • Caitlin Murphy

    Ugh, body glitter. Not one bit of this is working for me.

    • kimmeister

      Like, 2 gallons of body glitter.  Yikes!

  • Sobaika


    • Kayceed

      But hilariously bad, right? Like an overdecorated cupcake.

  • Stubenville

    Look like a Charlotte Russe $99 prom dress in a rash-inducing synthetic fabric.

    •  And with black tissue flowers stuck randomly all over it.


  • Not her dress indeed. It’s Sarah Jessica Parker’s dress.

    •  Looks like spring is BUSTIN’ out all over!

  • Burn it !

    •  get it with in a foot of a flame and it might- it looks VERY flamable!

  • So. Much. Body Glitter.

    • Fordzo

      Even her armpits look sparkly, for glitter’s sake!  

      •  I’m glad I’m not the only one who noticed that!

    • Elaine Lang

       When she returns that dress if won’t be good for much besides a Christmas Tree Skirt, it will be so coated with the crap.

  • joancarol

    She thinks she’s Brigitte  Bardot.

    • charlotte

       …with Cruella de Vil nails.

  • DinaSews

    This is one ‘ladystar’ (using the term VERY LOOSELY” that I just want to go away. Ugh.

  • Not. Good. At. All.

  • from the waist down it looks like something HBC would wear.

  • The hair would look fabulous with a sleek, fitted dress.  The nails are horrible though as are the slipper like heels.

    •  Heh, I thought they were like slippers too.

  • Anyone remember the original Hairspray? She’s got … THE BUG!

  • Janet B

    That’s a lot of dress for anyone to wear.
    I know she’s tiny, but she dresses as if she has a difficult figure to dress. 

  • appliquer

    Where are all the mirrors in Hollywood?

  • aeb1986

    Hair and makeup, bad. Nails, ahhh! Shoes, noooooo! I’ve run out of words to describe how terrible that dress is…Maybe after my coffee.

  • Who knew Disney Princess adult movies were a thing?

    Say no to body glitter unless you are actually on stage, people.

  • lehen

    blech to the whole thing.  and those are total junkie nails.

  • conniemd

    Someone please pull the rosettes off the skirt of the dress. It would make it less costumy

  • JaneDC

    Is she wearing bedroom slippers?

    • From the front…and then she turns sideways and they’re bedroom slippers with five-inch heels. WHY?!

  • The fit is awful through her torso, and that length is really unflattering. That isn’t helped by the black hooves.

  • alyce1213

    Thoroughly hideous, nobody’s dress.

  • Looks like she’s going for a Helena Bonham Carter look, only without the natural ease that makes it work so well for Helena.

  • Fordzo

    Jersey shore prom dress.  In which case, the nails are spot on.  

    • mightbewrong

      haha, and Jersey shore prom hair to go with it.

  • kno1ok

    I don’t care what they say about puns, I like them.  Thank you for “handful of years”.

  • It reminds me of the dress Ricky Lake wore in “Hairspray”. The rosettes look like bugs.

  • MilaXX

    The shoes and hair take it to prom territory, and I think it needs the belt not to look so twee.  However, she’s too tiny for a belt that large.

  • n a

    question:  is that ANYONE’s dress?  

    beyond that- sorta sad to see her tarting up the photogs like that.  there’s no pole here, honey…

  • Indigo54

    Why, why, why?   I’ve gotta lie down.

  • EditKitten

    Why does she insist on being dressed and styled like a baby hooker?

  • eowyn_of_rohan

    Wasted prom queen.

  • Jackie4g

    The dress hem is serged? I mean there is a line of stitches where a folded back hem used to be. That’s no way to treat satin! Or maybe that’s the new way to treat satin? Given, the dress belongs on a taller girl, but the ballgowns of yore revelled in their satin voluptuousness, their 4″ hems adding weight and drape to the sweeping skirts.  Showing this dress hemmed to tea length makes it look ashamed of itself. Beautiful girl, awkward dress.

    • ballerinawithagun

      Yes, that serged hem is atrocious! So many problems construction mistakes! That bodice fit is horrible and the pleats are ironed in the wrong direction, so that they add volume right below the waist and make it pop up instead of going into the gorgeous pleats as it does on the model. The rosettes are beautiful in the pink but just look like they are pinned on in the black.

  • elemspbee

    Does this girl ever get anything right in the clothing department? Tragic.

  • mhleta

    This dress leaves me appalled and bordering on apoplectic. Those fingernails should be waving over a caldron somewhere deep in a the darkest woods.

  • ojosazules

    The long silver and peach one on the runway is somebody’s dress. The sea urchin sack seen here is nobody’s.

  • BrooklynBomber

    Clown pants in a dress! With sexy sparkles!

  • mjude

    ack!  i do like the dress on the model.  sorry girl but the fingernails are just stupid.

  • Annabelle Archer

    Sex kitten hair with a Peggy Sue got dead dress.  Just no.

  • BuffaloBarbara

    Well, her version looks better than the model’s, at least.  Not saying much.

    And yes, Pinterest nails must leave.  Yesterday.

  • Judy_J

    Wrong, all wrong.

  • sweet_potato

    Wow, just wow.

  • schadenfreudelicious

    the hair and shoes belong in the boudoir, the talons belong in the trash….

  • ChaquitaPhilly

    Heh, heh, heh…
    So very wrong.
    I think the runway dress looks pretty bad too, but the pink and black version, with no belt is worse.
    The black nails are the least of it. Buy the girl a mirror.

  • quiltrx

    This dress works SO much better as a gown.  I’m one of the few that actually LIKES tea length around here, but this is NOT working.  It looks like someone hacked the bottom off and proceeded to hem it badly.  The tulip-y shape is completely lost.

    And yes, it’s WAY too much dress for her.  I like the hair, but maybe with something cute and youthful-looking, not trying to do the sexpot thing.  And those nails–UGH.  Wrong shoes too.

  • kmk05

    I think the hair makes it look even lore of a mess than it is 🙁 The dress is (plainly put) rather hideous: but maybe it’s because of the colour scheme? I much prefer it on the model, especially with that belt.

    I am just wondering about those nails: I mean, do normal women wear them? I don’t want to say the anecdotal ‘I don’t’, but…how can you do anything WITH these fingers? How do you take your makeup off, or wipe your ass without injury?

    Inquiring minds are burning to know.

  • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

    It doesn’t get tackier than this.

    • Annabelle Archer

      Betcha five bucks JLo can prove you wrong.

  • Fordzo

    Wait a minute…are her ring fingers a different color than the rest of her nails?  Just when I thought it couldn’t get any tackier.  

    •  Yeah, the ring finger a different color or pattern than the other nails has been a “thing” for years now.

      • Fordzo

        I guess.  Now that you mention it, I recall noticing the same thing on Rhianna and Lady GagGag.

  • l_c_ann

    1) how to make fleurchons look even worse
    2) make a dress that would be a fail for a 2nd year high school home ec class
    3) go to  a hairdresser who is on a four day bender and no longer gives a F
    4) save this photo for an actress’ s thirty year retrospective…the what are they doing now sort?  because it is a sad answer to a lot of questions

  • Susan Crawford

    The runway version was kind of over-the-top weirdly fabulous, but only for lanky model-tall gals. The tea-length version in black and white (or off white? or pale pinky-white?) completely overwhelmed petite little Vanessa.

    The nail “art” trend – along with neon-pink lipstick, red-toned eye shadow, and layers of furry false lashes – is an epic fail that cannot die fast enough.

  • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

    The model’s dress is so much prettier, both in styling and very much in color choices.  Pink and Black reminds me of some kind of sleazy pin up from the 1950’s and those nails just drive that image home.  All she needs is a black poodle on that skirt. Ugh.

  • filmcricket

    Low-rent Lea Michele. I know HSM came before Glee, but all I can see with the posing & the trying-so-hard sexpotting is someone “pulling a Lea” without outsize talent to back it up. Just try being cute for a few more years before you start vamping it up, honey. There’s no need for this.

  • shanteUstay

    The model is working the HELL out of that dress! Looooove!
    Anchoring the dress down with black rosettes just made that petite lil thing look like she weighed 800lbs

  • bertkeeter

    If you want to look like a cow, this is the dress! 

  • Introspective

    given how much of a fucking mess she looks, I wish the girl didnt have such a smug, self-satisfied duckface going on here. really.

  • Tamara Hogan

     Oh dear.

  • Imagine the resulting nosebleed if a person picked his/her nose with those fingernails.  Yick.

  • GhostOfMisterPamuk

    This is no one’s dress. 

  • HAAAAAAAAATE the nails. Hate the makeup, the hair, the shoes, and the body glitter (you can see it in the picture with those nails). This dress is SO not her. Also, at this point, I’m almost enraged by the duck-lips expression.

    Also, I like the color of the dress on the model better than the one Vanessa is wearing.

  • The diva to beat all divas, Barbra Streisand, had pointy nails way back in the day. And Adele was wearing them a la Barbra a couple of years ago, but you add the pointyness to the Pinterest polish, and it’s AWFUL.

  • my first thought was…poor thing sneezed SO HARD it knocked her hairdo loose and knocked off the cheap doily things on her chest (I don’t want to assume they are large cockroaches) and broke her (ugly) shoes….she can see toes peekign thru….what a WHOPPER of a sneeze that much have been (coc + peppery sandwich?)

  • stubbornthoughts

    I don’t…understand. Any of this.

  • the shoes are totally wrong, and the hair takes it into princess territory (in a bad way).
    this dress needs to be worn by somebody with a little edge.
    anne hathaway? mia wasikowska?

  • butterflysunita

    The dress almost works with the color scheme on the model, because the flowers are pink and you get a clear cascading flower effect.  On Vanessa, it looks like she has cupcake wrappers stuck to her dress.  Just awful.  

    • JauntyJohn

       This. Yes.

  • jw_ny

    As is on Vanessa, the entire look is awful..tacky.  Those matchy shoes are a crime!  That shape and length on her is beyond unflattering.  Well…maybe it would be ok if she were about to perform a cancan.

    It’s not as bad on the model…color, length, and belt help.  Still, those hips…ugh.

  • almondemy

    I’m sorry – I cannot with this one.  I irrationally dislike her the way I used to irrationally dislike La Lohan (before it just felt mean to wish bad things upon La Lohan).  But, UGH.  I hate every choice she ever makes.  

  • elleg929

    The “flowers” look like smashed peanut butter cup wrappers.

  • Nariya

    Failed attempt at a HBC costume 🙁

  • Tracy_Flick

    Wow, that is a semester-long course in how to mess up proportion. She looks like one of those toys were you can rotate the head, feet, and middle and come out with a mismatched figure. Awful.

  • Zippypie

    God, that is horrid from head to toe!

  • unbornfawn

    The dress looks like a Project Runway Auf!

  • Imasewsure

    Just box it up… hopefully you will break a nail or two as well which will be a plus for all of us

  • DaveUWSNYC

    Puts me in mind of Tracy Turnblad’s “Miss Auto Show 1963” Coronation gown…she’s got the BUG.

  • decormaven

    You have a bosom now. We get it. You don’t have to serve it up on a pink and black platter, dear. 

  • Call me Bee

    Wow–she took a kinda interesting and fashion-forward dress and with that length and color change, turned it into a tart’s dress.  And emphasized that with the sex-kitten hair and nails. 
    (Gentleman–I so agree about the nails!) 

  • margaret meyers

    That dress looks as bad as that movie.
    That dress looks as cheap as that movie.
    That dress looks as badly made as that movie.
    That dress is in as bad taste as that movie.

  • kittenwithaquip

    But you guys, her nails are pointy because they’re HEARTS! Isn’t that just adorbz???

    NO. It’s dumb.

  • margaret meyers

    That dress is as bad for her career as that movie.

  • emchicago

    she is just a tacky, tacky girl.  she also seems like an idiot.  

  • MoHub

    Only HBC could get away with that much cray-cray.

  • Aside from its many other flaws, this dress makes no sense without the belt.

    • snarkykitten


  • Alyssa

    No…this is not her look. She almost looks like she wants to be HBC with this look. Although I can never picture HBC with those dreadful nails.

  • pop_top

    She’s so pretty and has a lovely figure, but I always get this overwhelming sense of smug that biases how I judge her outfits.
    The dress just doesn’t do anything for her. Maybe if it were shorter or longer? 

    Also, babyheads. But I guess since Ashley went for peek-a-boo boobs, Selena went for side boob, and Rachel went for flattened boobs, Vanessa’s look is appropos.


  • Candigirl1968

    I also wish she’d update her makeup.  She’s been sporting the same smoky-eyed look since HSM days. 

  • GhostOfMisterPamuk

    Also really sick of the Olsen Twin duck mouth thing she does.

  • looks like Reeses wrappers

  • amaranth16

    Burn that dress. Burn it with fire.

  • shelley514

    Way too much white under eye concealer.  She looks like  a tranny with all that highlighting and contouring.

  • libraangel

    She scares me – Really. I would run away and hide.

  • The runway version is really striking; I like THAT one.

  • Crystal

    SO. MUCH. BODY. GLITTER. *my eyes*

  • Hispanic? Anna Nicole Smith.

  • lrober03

    Oh no.  

    Should have stuck with the original version, the color combo is better, and the proportion of the skirt works a lot better

  • Also, those are not your shoes. 

  • Anniebet

    I mean.. uh, well, damn. I’m speechless, apparently.

  • peachy

    i know ….. she doesn’t have mirrors in her home, right? RIGHT?!? ugh.

  • zelavie

    Is that BODY GLITTER?  Honey, it is NOT 1997.

  • SRQkitten

    Um, she’s pole dancing for a movie called “Spring Breakers.” Tacky sexpot looks seems like it might actually be a match.


  • love the hair.  hate the nails.

  • Nancy Dunn

    Elle fanning would look good in this.

  • NYCGlamourpuss

    Wow.  Does this girl ever need some gays!

  • The change of color and the removal of the belt changes it from fashion to prom.

  • Love the shoes, tho!

  • Does anyone else see Tracy Turnblatt’s cockroach dress from Hairspray?