Jennifer Lopez in Beverly Hills

Posted on January 30, 2013

J Lo went to lunch and the press treated it like the Queen of England rode into town on a unicorn.

Which is as it should be, really.

Jennifer Lopez in Beverly Hills in a Versace ensemble paired with a Valentino clutch.

Valentino Animal Rock Star Studded Clutch

Everyone in the restaurant stood and applauded when she walked in. Waiters wept. Children burst into song. Haters burst into flame.

You’ve just gotta love a gal who shows up for lunch dressed like a night-time soap opera villain, with photographers in tow. Jenny’s like an old Hollywood star that way. She knows the show never ends and considers it her job to constantly give people something to look at. Joan Crawford takes a moment from admiring her eyebrows in heaven, looks down on her, and says, “Attagirl” with approval. Divas don’t stop.

We sincerely hope she threw a glass of wine in someone’s face because this is totally the outfit for it.



[Photo Credit: PacificCoastNews,]

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  • Roosevelt 85


    • Sobaika

      I LOVE that she is wearing minimal makeup. All the more fierce.

  • xmixiex

    that hair and the boxiness of the suit sure give her a Pepper vibe… love the clutch though.

    • gsk241

       I’m torn.  On one hand, I love that she doesn’t have Cocker spaniel hair.  On the other hand, that top knot is giving her a real pinhead look.  I don’t like it.

      • Hair that tight would give mere mortals migraines. 

      • xmixiex

        it definitely needs some texture, or to be up a little higher.  it looks like bad middle school hair. 

  • She looks incredible!

  • Is she wearing cream and white? Is that OK?

    • I do believe she is – and I hate it.  It sets all my OCD senses tingling.

    • uprightcitizen

       It’s actually just two different whites … I doubt you could call those pants “cream.” Maybe white and winter white. But I agree that it’s a jarring mistake. When you’re wearing an all-white outfit or an all-black outfit, the colors should be the same. And those pants look a little tragic in the fit.

    • Call me Bee

      I used to get that way (eye-twitchy) when I saw black and navy together, but I’m over it.  I didn’t even noticed the white/winter white till you mentioned it, so it’s ok by me…

  • I don’t like anything about this, except maybe the top, paired with something else, preferably in a different color.

    • makeityourself

      I’m with you.  Both the top and pants are unflattering.  And what is that thing on her left shoulder?  A blob of shoulder pad sticking out?  A really wide bra strap?  Sloppy, sloppy.  Sorry, but this whole thing looks haphazard.

  • ccinnc

    > Kardashian.

    • Vickiefantastico

      Yes! She looks just like a Kardashian, doesn’t she? I couldn’t put my finger on what was wrong, but you’re so right!

      • ccinnc

         A little better than a Kardashian, which is what my cryptic “>” was supposed to signify. 🙂

  • HomeOfficeGirl

    Ummm… I dunno.  Take off the belt and it’s a white top and slacks.  The slacks don’t fit her great and the shoes look silly with it. 

    • kschwarting

      I’m with you.  I like her in white, but not this white outfit.  And I’m not good with the white nails trend.

      • judybrowni

        Nurse Ratched converted a straightjacket into a uniform with matching librarian hair bun.

      • BarniClaw

        Right?! Reminds me of painting my nails with Liquid Paper as a kid.

    • Little_Olive

      Oh the shoes are absolutely terrible with it. Matchy clutch, even worse. 

    • Spreecord

       If there’s one thing wearing all white screams, it’s “I had nothing to do with my children while I was getting ready, leaving the house, and eating.”

      Also, how did she manage to eat a whole meal without ruining that outfit? Is she a wizard?

      • formerlyAnon

        Perhaps this is not one of the days where she eats much. You up the odds of staying pristine if you’re sipping water and only move the fork between the plate and your mouth maybe a half dozen times. She’s 43(?) and I swear sometimes I think she’s thinner now than she was for most of her 20s. That takes effort.

  • imperfectlaura

    Wow…I don’t even know what to say to this. This is a “Shut the hell up and look at me” look.

    • Alyssa

      And a very good one at that!

  • PeggyOC

    Maybe it’s just the lighting, but the whites look like they don’t match and it’s making my eye twitch.  If you’re going to do cream and white, they need to be far enough apart to distinguish.  This just looks like one item is older and a bit more worn than the other.

  • Janet B

    Her face says I’m not worthy to even look her way. She’s going to throw the wine on me, I know it.

    She wears the look well, but the mom in me thinks how about a little color on your face?

    • shirab

      The mom in me thinks I guess you didn’t have to walk within a 15-foot radius of your little kids in that outfit. (Though perhaps her kids don’t have grubby hands and milk mustaches like everyone else’s.)

      • charlotte

         Her kids are sitting somewhere silently, waiting for her to come and brush their hair… with those nails.

      • 3boysful

         Ah, but I believe her kids are “elegant,” yes?  Or some such nonsense.

  • AwesomeMargie

    I just love your commentary.  Here’s to hoping she did throw a drink in someone’s face. 

  • Warrior89


  • B_C_J

    The fit is not good at all.  The outfit makes her look thick. The pant leg is also too wide. Go back to your closet and put something else on. Keep the clutch.

  • Guess she wasn’t planning to eat spaghetti.

    • DeborahJozayt

      The non-slurping kind is some expensive stuff. She can splurge on it 🙂

      •  I’d still splash. I don’t have what it takes to be a diva.

        • RebeccaKW

          I’m sure someone chops up the pasta into little tiny bites and scoops it onto a spoon for her.  The plate probably doesn’t get near her.

    • l_c_ann

      Maybe two strands of spaghetti with lemon juice and a spritz of emulsified butter.

  • The pants suit is a little 1970s, but that works for J Lo

    •  Extra costume from Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

      •  I can get behind that.

      • H3ff

        I’m thinking Star Wars. It’s very Senator Amidala.

  • alyce1213

    Again with the white.  The top is white and the slacks are off-white, not quite different enough to work together; it just looks off.  And the slacks are awful, they fit terribly.  That and the matchy shoes and bag make this is quite the cheesy Hollywood diva look.
    Joan Crawford might approve of the attitude, but not the clothes.
    (Where’s the boy?)

    • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

      I totally just wrote what you said.  Almost too a tee.  GREAT MINDS THINK ALIKE! Cheers!  xo BWGPanties.

      • Pennymac

        alyce and BWGP, both spot on, I have nothing to post now. Oh, wait,  can I name my all girl punk band “Cheesy Hollywood Divas”? 

  • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

    First, I love her. BUT 1) white top, cream pants – did you get dressed in the closet and didn’t see that they are too close in color to be on purpose?  2) ARE THOSE MATCHY LEOPARD SHOES I SEE HER IN?  3)  She has such beautiful skin.  Jeez.

    And now I scoll down and see others have said this much better than I could have. I say “Back to the Closet!”

    • conniemd

       I also noticed that the shoes appeared to be leopard shoes to match her clutch.

  • kaycem

    she is deadly fierce, obviously.  i always love her no matter how age-inappropriately her outfit may be, but i cannot — under any circumstances — co-sign mismatched white.  if that’s supposed to be cream or buff, it needs to try harder.

  • SewingSiren

    White polyester pantsuit. The uniform of the silent screen era sirens who retired to Palm Springs and were photographed by LIFE magazine in the 1970’s.

  • Lilithcat

    We sincerely hope she threw a glass of wine in someone’s face because this is totally the outfit for it.

    It better be white wine.

  • Zippypie

    Wow, this has really got that polyester double-knit vibe going for it.  I think my grandmother wore this in 1976. Or it was a costume from Space 1999.

    Love the clutch and the bitchface.  Diva bitchface beats out aging ex-porn star bitchface that she’s been giving on the carpet lately hands down!

  • I’m not seeing the cream and white that most people are. I still don’t  like it, the fit seems sloppy. And the slicked back hair bun trend is not something that appeals to me on the lady divas. 

    • Dot

       The pants just look dingy to me.

      • Well and at first glance with those pointy white fingernails I really thought she had a cigarette in her hand. 

        • Tatiana Luján

          so did I.

  • Funkykatt

    I don’t understand the fascination with her and I suppose I should being like her in having wide hips. I mean it’s about time we pear shaped girls got our due but she’s just so…so……whatever. 

  • OrigamiRose

    She’s really standing by the “Lee Press On Nails” thing, isn’t she?  Well kudos for consistency, if not taste.

    Aside from the heels and clutch, this looks like it came out of imagination of Nolan Miller.  Alexis or Krystal would have worn it better, though.

  • I love this, primarily because of the leopard and the high bun. It’s like saying “I’m a business woman…but I’m STILL J-Lo!!”

  • E. D.

    Something about the proportions of the top combined with the hair makes her look a little pinhead.

  • Dot

    White top, dingy (by comparison) pants, absurdly matchy accessories, talon nails, and bunhead. 

  • Rand Ortega

    If she did throw a glass of wine in anyone’s face, my $’s on the guy behind her, her manager, Benny Medina. W/ “Parker” a bona fide flop & no film prospects in sight,  there’s definitely some disaster management going on.

    Can’t get behind the outfit. I’ve seen nurse’s uniforms w/ more style. The accessories are gorge. Hair & makeup– minimal & lovely.

    • Introspective

      rand, you *code cracked* that shit. this is totally the forced happiness after a tense meeting where benny medina got ripped a new one for her flagging career prospects… 

      thank god for limitless money, bad relationship choices and good clothes or else we’d never talk about her. 

  • CurbGirl

    Who’s the guy with the carry out muffin?

    • Vera L-

      is that a euphemism?

      • Rand Ortega

         Spew Alert!

  • MilaXX

    Hate the hair, but I gotta admit, I kinda love the outfit. 

  • Cathy S

    She looks fab.

  • Tatiana Luján

    I hate the super tight hair, the missmatching whites, the dragon nails and the matching shoes and purse. I just hate this. 

    • fringebenefit

      You just wrote everything I was about to. AGREE.

  • AnnaleighBelle

    There is nothing attractive about any of it.

  • MzzPants

    I’m so used to seeing her in too-tight clothing that my first response was, ‘this suit looks like a sack’.  Had to take a cleansing breath and look again.  She does look ready to cut a bitch in those first photos.

  • miagain

    she looks awful

  • queeniethebold

    “Haters burst into flame.” Positively dying here.

    No, i mean really. i am one little crispy burnt-up hater. Hee hee!

    • Spicytomato1

      That line is what got me, too. And with a big gulp of tea in my mouth. Of course.

  • Ruth Preston

    Clearly they’ve just been discussing the reboot of Judith Krantz’s “Scruples,” where she’ll (obvs) star as Billy Ikehorn Orsini.

    • hellkell

       I would watch the hell out of that!

  • I absolutely loathe the talon-nail trend.

  • kimmeister

    I love leopard print, but I don’t think it looks good paired with white.  I also wouldn’t do more than one leopard thing at a time, but it is JLo so that’s asking for too much.

  • This just looks like she’s on her lunchbreak from the salon to me. Hair in bun, all white uniform, ridiculous nails – this is pretty much standard nail technician gear right?

    • Spicytomato1

      Actually I was going to say salon, too, not as an employee but as a client. From the shoulders up — the white top, the bare face, the scraped back hair — I’d guess she was taking a break between spa treatments.

  • formerlyAnon

    I NEED a button to click to “love” this post.

    You guys are goooood.

  • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

    Wow, the expression on that puss in the first shot.  She looks ready to kill somebody!

  • All I can think when I see this is: those twins weren’t within a 3 block area of her when she got dressed in that outfit. 

  • GorgeousThings

    Her fingernails are SO tacky.

  • marilyn

    I think this makes her look stocky, like a big girl.  Wadding her hair up in a little knot on top of her face is not attractive.  She only looks mildly ticked off in the pictures (no lightning bolts coming from her eyes today).  This looks like a uniform for a floor nurse, or for a hairdresser.  Wearing white and looking (semi)mean does not do it for me.

  • BrooklynBomber

    Jesus. The outfit’s nice, but the shoes, clutch, fingernails, jewelry, and hair are killing me.

  • Stubenville

    I think the physicians assistants in my doctors office wear pretty much the same outfit in turquoise. With sensible shoes of course.

  • Ooh, wow. I am not liking this at all. GIRL, that’s not your HAIRDO. Fix that, and this outfit might be passable. But as is, I can’t see anything else.

  • Imasewsure

    Some pix make it look frumpy and some look great. Sick of her white phase but this is pretty good. Love the Joan Crawford 40’s vibe (and the attending divaliciousness of course)

  • Dear god, I just can’t with those nails and those accessories.

  • hellkell

    She looks pissed. Maybe because of that manicure. Those nails are making Jesus, Mary, AND Oprah cry.

  • Now *that’s* more like it.

  • Why is she on this white kick lately? I can’t stand it. And her talons are creepy.

  • LOL, she is such a gypsy!  All that white, the leopard print bag and shoes, the jewelry…it’s all too much!  Someone should tell her though that she is NOT one of those women who can rock the nude makeup look.  (That hair we will give a moment of silence.)  She really is so tacky.  

  • thesixthbeatle

    Her hair must be giving her a monster headache.

    • Trisha26

      I just thought the exact same thing!

  • decormaven

    There’s too much animal print here for me, but I don’t think I could have handled another white accent thrown into this mix. It would be a white-out!

  • Judy_J

    Pants are a bit too long (she typed as she burst into flame).

  • Call me Bee

    A surprisingly sensible outfit for lunch in LA! (Love the clutch, and will be sewing up a knock-off by the end of the day…)

  • IAmJ

    God, those shoes are so tacky.

  • Lisa M. (ReVoir) Kramp

    Sorry, I’ve burst into flame and can’t comment!

  • Jennifer Coleman

    I’d like to think she went up to the first person she laid eyes on in the dining room – man, woman or child – and slapped them full across the face, then kept walking. Just because.

  • CPK1

    aaargh, croydon facelift strikes bev hills

  • warnerave

    she’s sorta like the upper tier kim kardashian…became iconic and famous for having no talent at all….

    • Pfffft JLo sings just fine. Haters gonna hate. 

  • I’m in the Vagina Monologues this semester and our costume color-scheme is supposed to be white with black and red accents – I wish I could wear this exact outfit for my monologue. FAB. 

  • Jecca2244

    oh god. I want that clutch.

  • She’s done something jolly with her hair.  Maybe it keeps her face stretched tightly.

  • Allison Woods

    That purse looks expensive, in a cheap sort of way. I didn’t realize estheticians made so much money.

  • libraangel

    Are you drinking too much vino, T&L, or is it me because I hate the whole thing, e.g. pants too long, too matchy-matchy shoes with clutch, too severe, and that bun! So tight it is like a face-lift!

  • JulieTy

    Her nails looks like Jordan almonds. 

    • libraangel

      HA HA LOL Thanks for making me laugh, JulieTy!

      • JulieTy

        My pleasure! xoxo

  • Zippypie

    AH!!!  EXAZZZZZZACTLY, Foodycat!!

  • guest2visits

     Yes this is queen diva wear, but I don’t think the 80s white pantsuit does anything for her. Or the hair. Or nails. Or clutch.
    In fact the wild and campy leopard print heels are the only item I care to see again. Unless she wears her shoes once and tosses
    them like spent tissue, diva style.  But yes this perfect soap opera villain.

  • bertkeeter

    I hear she SKYPES regularly with her children….such a mom she is!

  • When she wears her hair like this it always reminds me of the way synchronized swimmers put massive amounts of gelatin (I think? — something similar, anyway) in their hair to cement it into place and eliminate flyaways.

  • TSkot

    Nuh-uh.  Looks like wife of the leader of some cult.

  • quiltrx

    Just looking at the world’s tightest bun is giving me a headache.  Definitely bitchhair.

  • Lilak

    That’s some sort of Nurse Ratched of the future.  My heart rate just doubled.  

  • Sashima

    Hmmm…she seems to be wearing ALL her wedding and engagement rings.

  • Amy

    It’s one thing to overdue the leopard accessories but it’s quite another to sport white claws. Meow.

  • ccm800

    cannot. So the absolute opposite of a diva to me. 

  • fursa_saida

    One thing you can say for JLo: she really knows how to wear wide-legged pants. (A very specific complement, but a worthy one.)


    She is in a “white period” these days, isn’t she?

  • Tuneful54

    The belt: cross between a truss and a maxi-pad.
    Did something not very jolly with her hair. In fact, I think Miss O’Brien fixed it.
    Looks like JLo fished those two pieces out of a laundry bag first thing in the morning and didn’t see that they don’t match.

    • 4JJ

      “The belt is a cross between a truss and a maxi-pad. Did something not very jolly with her hair–O’Brien all the way.”

      This was laugh-out-loud good. Thanks!

  • yethica

    I think she looks horribly trashy… like an over-plastic-surgeried housewife.  Ick.

  • She’s so horrible to everyone in her sphere it doesn’t matter what she looks like, because she is disgusting inside.

  • mmc2315

    It’s over the top for lunch, tacky, and very J Lo.  

    I don’t like it, but it is true to her style.  I’ll give her that.

  • Margaret Houlihan hair from early MASH episodes

    • libraangel

      Margaret Houlihan’s hair looked better than JLO’s

  • maggiemaybe

    Her bun is making my eyes water. Ow.

  • I actually like the leopard print pumps with the all white suit. Don’t care for the matchy clutch. 

  • libraangel

    I don’t know if I would dare to white pants again after the stains malfunction last time (where are her stylists?)

  • gg80302

    I think she watches too many Mexican Soap Operas, it’s skewing her sense of reality.

  • HATE the hair. In the top photo she looks really broad all over. Not a flattering ensemble IMHO. Then again, I’m really not a fan of JLo. She’s overrated in every way in my book.

  • A Gray-t Idea

    I love JLo’s all-white suit which plays up nicely to her white hair roots.  I like the natural look on her! She is sexy.

  • PeaceBang

    It’s all somehow very Streisand. It’s Miami meets Boca, and I’m uncomfortable.

  • The top and bottom are different shades of white. Otherwise, I actually like her look.