Dita Von Teese in Valentino Couture

Posted on November 30, 2012

This is not getting a shout of “WERQ!” from us. You might ask why.


Dita Von Teese attends event at Cafe Royal in London in Valentino Couture dress paired with Christian Louboutin pumps.

Christian Louboutin Super Vic Pumps

It’s because Miss Dita, in this outfit, is simply beyond our vulgar classifications and outbursts. She’s serving up Snow White realness on a silver fucking platter and she looks freaking PERFECT.

Bow down, mortals.



[Photo Credit: Getty, ChristianLouboutin.com ]

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  • She’s like Snow White AND the Evil Queen. Luv huh!

  • The shoes are gorgeous, but her toes look tortured!

    • mshesterp

      I think the way they show off the toe cleavage because they’re so “low cut” (weird terminology for shoes) is kinda ick.  But everything north of the ankles is pitch perfect.

    • If you look closely, you’ll see her poor feet have slid forward. There’s a gap in the heel. I hate when shoes do that. They are beautiful, but look absolutely painful. But, she’s a work of art so, she must suffer. 

    • Man, I kinda hate the shoes.

  • Sara__B

    Thanks for the much-needed dose of perfectly lovely.

  • judybrowni

    You boys had me worried for a moment, there.

    Ms. Von Teese gives me a girl gasm.

  • Wendi126

    Stunning. Here’s a fun question for Bk’s- you open up to TLo and see fashion posts for Miss Dita, Cate, Tilda, Cathy Cambridge or GaGa….where do you go first? For me, it would be Dita

    • Pants_are_a_must

      Cate for me.

    • BazoDee

      Cathy Cambridge!

    • carolynmo

      Cate. Always Cate first.

    • ecallaw1977

       Dita, then Cate, then Cathy, then Tilda, then Gaga.  Tilda and Gaga bore me because their outfits are so out there I can’t even really be critical or appreciative.

    • ojosazules


    • Swinton.

    • erinbinek

      Dita fo’ sho’.

    • filmcricket

      SWINTON. You never know what you’re going to see with her. She’s more adventurous than anyone on that list except GaGa, but she never looks like a pre-school art project on acid. The unpredictability makes her even more fascinating than she already is.

    • mshesterp

      OOh, good question!  The fashion version of “Death is not an option.”  Probably Cathy, because her style is probably the closest to what I could pull off (if only there were less $ attached to the clothing).  Then Cate/Tilda/Dita (Dita always looks so perfect…it’s never a surprise!)…Gaga is WAY last.  I find her just boring because she tries so hard to be ART.

    •  If Shelly O were on here, that’d be mine. But to answer your question: Cathy Cambridge. I don’t love every outfit, but certain ones stand out like the teal gown and those wedges that launched a thousand more wedges.

    • Gaga because I know it’ll be batshit crazy, and THEN I go to Dita because I know it’ll be perfection. Then on to Cate, Cathy and Tilda in no particular order, since they all usually require more thought on my part.

    • Dita definitely. But if Chloe and her alters were in the mix, then I definitely go for her (them?) first. Makes me fee normal.

    • kikisayshi

       Definitely the Princess.

    •  Dita with Cathy as a close section. Dita is always so spot on that I wonder if she’s sometimes human. Cathy is definitely more hit and miss.

    • Rand Ortega

      Tilda (In a class by herself), Dita (Ditto), Cate (Incredible taste) & the rest (both trying too hard– 1 to be different, the other to be the same. Which is which is up to interpretation).

    • ankali

       Cathy, ’cause she’s a real honest-to-God princess, and I apparently am not the feminist I thought I was.

    • formerlyAnon

      Dita or Cathy, depending on the thumbnail. (Though were Hot Ginger Handler to return, it’d be Gaga. ‘Cause in that case, it wouldn’t be about her.)

    • Brad Watson

      Fan Bing Bing!

    • guest2visits

      A toss-up between Cate and Cathy C.    Cate because of how she wears clothes, Cathy because of her interesting
                                                                      comings and goings. (and I’ll admit, a little bit of a baby watch, too)

    •  Vogue Korea editorials, Tilda, Dita, Cate, FanBingBing, everyone else. Meh on Cathy, and I only click Gaga for the Hot Handlers now. Ha.

    • Jennifer Jacobsen-Wood

       Cathy Cambridge, the future mum.  IDK why, but I love those posts.  Of course, if you included FLOTUS, that would trump them all.

  • kschwarting

    There was a great article about her in the Sunday Styles section of the NYTimes last week, for fellow bitter kittens who are entranced by her.  Which is probably almost all of us.

    • shirab

      I saw that, too. And I have to say, I was curious as to why the writer alluded to her having acknowledged  that she’s had surgical enhancements without mentioning specifically what they were. Now I look at her and think, did she have her waist nipped, or her boobs enlarged, or are we just talking about Botox? It’s distracting.

      • filmcricket

        She has certainly had a boob job, she’s admitted to that before. Dunno about anything else.

      • MzzPants

        That waistline comes from years of tightlacing.

  • What would happen if I said I have an irrational hate for Von Teese?

    • i’d say i want to know why 🙂

    • M

      I would agree.  I am so tired of her.  It’s just a costume, everyday. 

    • More for me!

      • GorgeousThings

        Yup, go for it – more Dita for the rest of us! 

    • Vickiefantastico

      I’m so happy to see this! I’m right there with you. I don’t know what it is, but I’ve felt that the first time I saw her.

  • FrayedMachine

    Every time I see her, I think she’s utter perfection. It might be my tastes though but I really don’t like the puffed sleeves. Other than that, aahh… this is an ‘of course’ but in a good, envious way.

  • ChaCha_70

    Words can’t express her style and beauty. That said, I seriously think she made a pact with the devil because her skin is fucking flawless and she’s not a spring chicken anymore.

    •  I met Nigella Lawson a couple of weeks ago and was amazed by her skin – in her 50s and absolutely flawless. Not tanning, good genetics and a lot of facials, I think.

  • MoHub

    You’re right. WERQ is not enough to describe this perfection.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      Indeed-this is beyond WERQ. It’s simply perfection. 

  • Pants_are_a_must

    Her poor feet, and you wouldn’t even know, looking at everything above them. She’s absolutely stunning, and her waist is ridiculous.

    • cleverlady

      My first thoughts after I saw the awesome outfit:  oh, her poor feet.  How do those lady stars manage in those often pretty but obviously painful foot gear.  Great dress, however!

  • lalagigi

    Her skin….perfect.

  • Gosh, I thought you were marking her down for the run in her stockings. Although that might be a trick of the light. She really is extraordinary.

    • erinbinek

      I don’t think she’s wearing stockings.  Could that be a scar?

      • Possibly, because she’s not the girl to use fake tan! Anyway – I was just poring over the picture trying to figure out what the problem could possibly be, before I hit the punchline.

  • itsnotoveryet11

    I just spent five minutes desperately trying to figure out what you could possibly dislike, oh how you fooled me!

  • I just did a gay gasp and I’m not even gay.  Wow – you GO Miss Von Teese!

  • Pennymac

    Bowing the fuck down…..

  • jilly_d

    she has got to be the only person besides Snow White who could possibly make that neckline work.  Snaps!

  • PrunellaV

    This might be the best I’ve ever seen her look. And that’s saying a lot.

  • shirab

    How refreshing to see someone all dressed up who is standing in front of something equally splendid, rather than just posing on a piece of tape in front of a makeshift wall full of logos. Dita even gets the backdrops right.

  • bertkeeter

    Dont believe that belt is part of origional design???? 

  • lilibetp

    I was gonna say…

  • Twinzilla

    The perfect way to dress for an evening at the Cafe Royal.  She is sui generis.

  • Trisha26

    Gorgeous and stunning beyond words.

  • erinbinek

    Sublime.  Don’t love the shoes, but that’s minor.

  • filmcricket

    I have an irrational hatred of toe cleavage, so I cannot bow completely to the ground. The rest of her looks pretty fucking fabulous, though. 

    • RedRaven617

      I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one who hates toe cleavage. Those shoes look like they are killers!

    • I agree

  • Qitkat

    She’s not one I squeal over, but she looks so freaking awesome here, I LOVE IT.
    The white fabric would make for the most stunning wedding gown.

  • mjude

    bowing. i adore the dress.  she looks smashing!

  • I love every single thing about this.

  • I was hoping you were going there, because when I saw the picture I literally stopped breathing.  Amazing.

  • Kayceed

    I love her too much – right down to that manicure.

  • Darva Sutra

    Perfection, as always! She can do no wrong, in my eyes.  Neither can Gwen Stefani.  Never get enough of these two!

  • Before I even read this, I thought, ” Once Upon A Time wishes their costumes could look like this!”. Take note ABC!

  • GorgeousThings

    Gorgeous!!!! Love the manicure. But I must say, her poor feet look pained in those shoes.

  • Jecca2244

    serious question: does she pay for her dresses or do they give them to her? I was always curious how she makes her money. She’s look beautiful.

  • IMNAngryLiberal

    Dita is all kinds of fabulous as always, but maybe someone can answer this for me …. what exactly does Ms. Dita DO?  I mean other than look stunning 24×7.

    • Polka_Dotty

      She dances in the Burley-Q.

  • she’s the best fashionista of this time! 

  • I was thinking Alice in Wonderland, but Snow White is better. I simply could not believe you would find anything wrong with this–how happy I am to be right!

  • Kenisha Hill Phillips

    I’m not a fan of toe cleavage, but she looks divine.

  • B_C_J

    On anyone else, this dress would looked overworked and possibly ridiculous. Because she is a throwback to the ultra-feminine beauties of yesteryear, it’s absolutely perfect for her. I particularly like the cap sleeves and the beautiful neckline and the fact that because the dress is so embellished, she knew not to wear a necklace. 

  • Susan Rappenwolf

    All that comes to mind is “Wow!” and “Dang, girl!”

  • Dagney


  • Dot

    I’m convinced Dita could make a paper bag look good.

  • Fordzo

    THIS is how you do *sexy cleavage* without looking like you have baby heads stuffed down your bodice.  

  • Patricia Gillett

    That dress exists for her and her alone. She looks amazing. 

  • apt9000

    I love it, except for the shoes. I really dislike deliberate toe-cleavage vamps. If you want to show that much toe, just make it a sandal, damnit.

  • Melvis Velour

    I literally just died…of an overdose of fabulosity… 

  • Agree — perfect. She doesn’t always do it for me, but this is in a class of its own.

  • Contralto

    Just flawless.

  • kikisayshi

    I don’t know how she always looks so amazing! I have this idea of her in my head as someone who never speaks a word, she just walks around in killer clothes looking fabulous every day and gives the camera a wink every now and then. Supreme perfection.

  • Annabelle Archer

    When I read the header I almost couldn’t bring myself to open the post. I knew I would die from the shear perfection I would find.

  • We’re not worthy!  We’re not worthy!

  • ccm800


  • anotherkate

    She is exquisite, no doubt, but on the closeups of her arms it becomes apparent that I could break her. Like, unintentionally. I would never set out to break Dita von Teese. Perhaps her power comes not from traditional nourishment or workouts but solely via sartorial prowess…

  • Louise Bryan

    Oh, those poor little piggies.

  • Come and worship.

  • Rand Ortega

    She should have a Hallelujah Chorus trailing her at all times. Absolutely luminous. There’s a CA magazine called “C” w/ a photo spread depicting her as a blond. Amazing.

  • quiltrx

    That is one of the most awesome dresses I have ever seen…seriously.  I’ll always be a black-and-white girl.  And she looks FLAWLESS.

    (you guys had me worried there for a second!)

  • EEKstl

    Whew! I couldn’t find anything wrong and I was worried that I was not up to Bitter Kitten Standards! Perfection.

  • RocknRollmom

    I will speak in defense of those shoes.  I have no problems with well cut toe cleavage, kind of like the above the waist kind, it must be done well and look appropriate.  These shoes do that and more.  They are stunning.  She is as well.  I like everything about the dress but the hem line.  The black slashes look too heavy  perhaps if they were a smidge smaller or thinner?  I would love a close up of the clutch, the ring, and her manicure.  The detail in which everything plays off the other is just too much for this mortal who is lucky to get anything to really work together as she walk out the door.

  • MilaXX

    She looks Dita perfect, but I don’t really like the shoes with this.

  • formerlyAnon

    She does this so well. I don’t really care for the “wenchiness” (technical fashion term, yes?) of the neckline, but she makes it look almost as polished as the rest of the dress.

  • Those shoes look awfully uncomfortable.  But when the rest of you looks like that, who cares?

  • I love her and her style, but I dont like the skirt… 

  • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

    Why is it that she ALWAYS looks perfect without a misstep?  Are there Dita missteps?  And if so, can you post them?  Is this because she almost looks in costume when she steps out?  Are there casual photos of Dita going to Whole Foods or something? And what does she wear when she does this, if indeed she actually eats things?

    • formerlyAnon

      I picture her grocery shopping in heels and a ’50s “new look” shirt dress, red nails, a strand of black pearls and sunglasses. Decorative apron optional.

  • guest2visits

    She does look amazing. I think the angle of photography is very poor – the camera person must be 7 feet tall, but she simply
    defies that by showing off her brilliant white skin and decolletage.  I wonder if that secret elixir is available on QVC.

  • PaulaBerman

    It may be possible that she is not human.

  • I wish she had a less plastic (doll like) expression. It would be really nice if women in general stopped looking so crazily surgeried. She’s beautiful, but in striving for flawless she loses something. 

    • DeTrop

      There is a decidedly artificial aspect to her look.  Snow White is, after all, imaginary.  To paraphrase Jane Austen, ‘pictures of perfection make me cross’.  

  • bitterk

    Her waist is TINY!  

  • Hate the toe cleavage.

  • velomango

    As I scrolled, I kept thinking “why not a WERQ? Is it the toe cleavage? The manicure? I think it’s all stunning.” Then I get to the bottom, and I see that TLo is being clever. Clever clever.

  • Kaye Evans

    Her waist is TINY!

  • Flora O

    Jiminy Cricket! This, children, is why god invented Google.  Not being up on celebrity gossip, I was under the mistaken impression that von Teese here was the Nazi trollop instrumental in breaking up the marriage of Sandra Bullock, and could not understand why, though she dresses fabulously, so many pixels were spilt on her.  But no!  Entirely different person!  What a relief.  I felt so guilty for loving a racist homewrecker’s clothes.

  • RzYoung

    Yep, that’s how it’s done.

  • neofashionista

    She does truly look fabulous here
    Love the shoes
    Love everything!!!

  • decormaven

    Thank you, dear woman, for a perfectly fitted gown, properly chosen accessories, amazing hair, makeup and manicure. See, lesser minions? It can be done.

  • StillGary

    “Snow White realness” 

  • This is how I look and dress in the fantasy version of my life.

  • Cathy S

    That dress is fabulous.

  • Starting from the feet and scanning upwards I get “gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous” and then I get to her face and the lambs in my head start screaming.

  • Jillaine13

    I’ve become a Dita fan for the simple fact that she puts thought and effort into every appearance.  She’s damn near perfect (no to toe decolletage but no points deducted).  She always looks clean and perfectly groomed.  Kudos.  

  • Sweetvegan

    OMG, even her manicure is awesome and perfect!