Solange Knowles in Esteban Cortazar

Posted on October 12, 2012

Miss Solange. What the hell is going on with your left boob?

Solange Knowles attends the Absolut Tune Launch Party in New York City in Esteban Cortazar dress paired with Giuseppe Zanotti sandals. 

Esteban Cortazar Cutout Satin and Chiffon Bustier Dress

Giuseppe Zanotti Metal-plate Sandal

In fact, what the hell is going on with this entire outfit? The top is one of the weirdest things we’ve seen outside of a Project Runway episode, the skirt is both too sheer and a bit too long, and those shoes, while fierce as shit, don’t help the look one bit. Of course, we’re not entirely sure what would help the look save for taking it off and putting something else on, but still.

We’re all for risk-taking but that top is just plain FUG (with respect to our blogsisters). It’s like an S&M dentist fantasy of some sort.

 

 

[Photo Credit: Getty Images, net-a-porter.com, giuseppezanottidesign.com]

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  • http://profile.yahoo.com/W7A5N4G7FDTV5U2KOHBVSB55XI Basket

    Everyone stumbles, periodically. 

    • Introspective

      love solo, but she stumbles regularly though…

  • schadenfreudelicious

    S&M dentist breastfeeding top….

  • DinaSews

    Maybe she should have tried to put a turtleneck underneath.  ;)

  • http://gabyrippling.tumblr.com/ Gabriella M

    What why what.

    • http://twitter.com/omg_dora Dora K.

       Three excellent questions.

  • RebeccaKW

    The poor thing looks drunk.  Holding the wall isn’t helping.

    This entire outfit is horrifying me.

    • KateShouldBeWorking

      Agreed. I’m just going to assume/pretend/assign that she was also drunk when she bought this. And also when she put it on. And when she left the house in it.

      Aw, hell. Now I have to consider whether a (likely imaginary) drinking issue is better or worse than rationally choosing to associate with this dress.

      • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

        Friends don’t let friends dress drunk.

    • http://profiles.google.com/ameliaheartsu Amelia Logan

      I’m going to assume she looked fierce as shit sober trying it on in the mirror and after a couple drinks her poor posture just isn’t helping her WERQ

  • Janet B

    The top looks awkward on the model too.  

    I first though S&M nurse, but dentist works for me too.  A few special accessories and she’s ready for the next patient.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_VZLU6YVO4BRTELTTH3GRAAMWZQ Dot

    At first, I thought she had a tan purse slung over her left shoulder. Hah!

  • Judy_S

    That dress kind of turns her hair from charmingly natural to Bride of Frankenstein. Except she’s the Doctor and the Bride in one.

  • http://twitter.com/stellaphone Stella Zawistowski

    1) Some designer thought this was a good idea.
    2) Someone with money thought this was worth producing.
    3) At least one, and possibly more than one, person thought this was something Solange should wear.

    Each of these things boggles my mind individually, and together? I can’t.

  • LesYeuxHiboux

    Leeloo’s formal set of thermal bandages.

    • kimmeister

      Yes, I definitely got bandage out of this look.  It’s like she just had boob surgery and they’re all still bandaged up, and whoops her top ripped open revealing that state of affairs.

  • MilaXX

    I like this look in theory. That is, as shown on the model it almost works. However seeing this on Solange, it’s clear that this look is made to be editorial and should never be seen outside of a magazine ad.

    • tereliz

      Indeed.

  • Kayceed

    One of the worst cut-outs ever.

  • dress_up_doll

    Let me preface this by saying I love the unusual and avant garde fashion. So, for me, it seems to somehow work on the near-headless model (totally appropriate for this look, no?). Solange, as much as I adore her looks either knackered or blitzed out of her mind. Still pretty though. Love her eyebrows.

  • http://www.djplaw.com/ Tadiana

    50′s inspired Hooters uniform.

  • alyce1213

    Sexy lunch lady.

    • http://CallMeJane.com/ CallMeJane

       Three words that should never be put together!

  • tereliz

    Totally against the idea (and practicality) of hobble skirts, but the tighter silhouette on the model definitely looks better. Dear Solange’s stance is just widening the sheer underskirt. Of course, there’s still the problem of that top. So stripper dentist. 

  • LadyCelia

    *breaks into song*
    “She said, “My boy, I think someday
    You’ll find a way 
    To make your natural tendencies pay
    You’ll be a dentist
    You have a talent for causin’ things pain
    Son, be a dentist
    People will pay you to be inhumane
    Your temperament’s wrong for the priesthood
    And teaching would suit you still less
    Son, be a dentist
    You’ll be a success

    • teensmom99

      Just saw Little Shop on TV with my teen. Gotta love it!  Maybe this is what the background singers should have worn during that song.

    • Anathema_Device

       I, too, immediately got that song in my head once I read “S&M dentist.”

  • mike__tv

    Was she drunk/high before or after dressing herself that night. You decide. 

  • Tatiana Luján

    The top is so long that it screams for a pair of skinny pants to go with it. Well, that wpold be if the top didn’t have that fugly crazy cutout.
    LOVE the shoes.

  • B_C_J

    Beautiful woman wearing a giant bandaid across her left breast that is somehow attached to a smock! Throw it all into the incinerator except for the shoes. 

  • filmcricket

    “S&M dentist fantasy” – HA! Line of the day. Incredibly apt.

  • afabulous50

    Celebrities make me laugh…

  • VicksieDo

    This would be kind of awesome on a small chested girl like Gwynnie for instance, but Solange is too busty.  

    • Adriana_Paula

      YES.

  • melanie0866

    The white smock-like top and the skirt length make her look like a student nurse.  A student nurse with an odd part of her top missing.

  • Trisha26

    It is truly strange. The boob issue however, is explained by a look at the catalog link; you can’t have larger than an “A cup” to wear this. 

  • l_c_ann

    No to the S&M dentist.  Steve Martin did that so well in Little Shop of Horrors that the character is retired.

    The dress here….looks to be sewn from nice fabric.

  • Rand Ortega

    Love Solange. Love Cortezar (since his debut at 13, a mere 15 years ago). His collection on net-a-porter. com is fantastic.
    But I just can’t abide the boob sling. Stunt dressing at its…stuntiest?
     

  • Imasewsure

    Works above the neck and below the ankles… the rest I refuse to see

  • MarissaLG

    The nude lip isn’t doing her any favors either.

  • http://www.facebook.com/bert.keeter Bert Keeter

    TEDIOUS!

  • http://www.facebook.com/mwwgrimm Mariah W Grimm

    I give you that, but if you want your pretty for the day, I suggest you go youtube her new song. Oh the fashion it is divine. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Hy9W_mrY_Vk

  • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

    This has got to be the most stupid outfit I have ever seen. 

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/47S737MGWCAZEZ73QOAFKDFEKQ Jill

    That is one horrendously unflattering dress! And the shoes are just tacky.

  • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

    “Heeeeeyyyyy…I’m not so think as you drunk I am!!!”

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F73LIJ3SJGI5AJQMXMWXCKILHI Pamela

    Pointless & unnecessary cutout # 5642.  Fug.

  • http://twitter.com/GaraStJames Gara St. James

    Not a dress that should be worn away from a fashion show runway. No one could pull that off as legitimate “real life” wear.

  • mayavaly

    Oh boy. 

  • mmc2315

    Now I cannot unsee the dentist aspect of the top.  What has happened to our dear Solange?

  • guest2visits

    If it didn’t have that weird cut-out; this would be really flattering, with the right jewelry.

  • YourBaloneyDontGotNoSecondName

    I kind of love this.

  • http://twitter.com/MajorBedhead MajorBedhead

    Insane-asylum-chic. 

  • http://vhanna26.typepad.com Vera

    #Fail.

  • Qitkat

    Maybe this is a case of picking out the shoes first, and then looking for a dress to match. PR indeed.

  • frannyprof

    S&M dentist… hmmm… maybe it’s a Halloween costume?

  • Jennifer Coleman

    So does the boob-strap have adhesive on the inside? I just keep flashing to Steve Martin’s sadist dentist in the Sgt. Pepper’s movie from the 70′s.

    • julnyes

       So he played a sadistic dentist in two movies! Very interesting.

  • Kate4queen

    …or a nurse in a lunatic asylum…?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Maya-KC/537771651 Maya KC

    The top looked okay on a model, standing up straight, with no boobs. But on someone with a figure? Popping her hip? No no and no.

  • julnyes

    hate the outfit, but love the shoes.

  • boweryboy

    No girl.  No.

  • quiltrx

    Her left tit wanted to go as LeeLoo Dallas, and the rest of her wanted to go as Dentist Barbie.

  • Contralto

    totally not feeling the outfit, love the hair though.

  • https://twitter.com/LisaF1163 Lisa

    Hey, apparently they need dental assistants on the Planet Gargalack too!  

    I confess, I do love the shoes.

  • http://twitter.com/karenrubyleo Karen

    this is trying way to hard to be ‘edgy’ but ends up as just plain weird. She also really needs some coloured lippy, she looks washed out and exhausted.

  • ccm800

    Does she “work?”

  • pookiesmom

    That shirt gives me a headache. It’s turning her boob into one of those seeing eye tricks. I keep thinking that maybe if I unfocus my eyes, I’ll understand what is happening to the left side of her torso.

    No luck so far.

  • PeggyOC

    This is what the dental hygenists in Steve Martin’s sadistic dentist’s (from Little Shop of Horrors) office wear.

  • librarygrrl64

    That top reads “Sexy Cafeteria Lady” to me. Or “Sexy Dental Hygienist.” Maybe she’s on that “sexy-everything Halloween costume” trend.

  • lizlemonglasses

    My left one is a little bigger. I never thought about buying a special dress for it.