Brace yourself, kittens. This might be hard for you to accept until you see it with your own eyes, but after much debate and consideration of the following pictures, we have come to the difficult conclusion that … Jennifer Lopez is officially Trying Too Hard.
We were shocked too.
Jennifer Lopez and her boyfriend Casper Smart attend Anna Wintour’s Paris Fashion Week Reception for President Barack Obama. Jennifer Lopez wore a dress by Hakaan from the Fall 2012 collection paired with Tom Ford pumps.
Tom Ford Padlock Ankle-Strap Pump
SHE: Woke up in Diva Town, got in her car, and drove at highly dangerous speeds until she crashed head-on into a sign that says “WELCOME TO DRAG LAND, POPULATION: FIERCE.” We hope Anna Wintour invited RuPaul to this party, just so he could go up to J Lo and compliment her on her fishy realness. From a style point of view, there’s nothing particularly wrong with what she’s wearing here. It’s just that the dress is at least a size too small on her and the slit passed by “sexy” and hit “vulgar” about two inches ago. Her hair looks very wiggy and her makeup looks just plain odd. Score: 5/10. Go up a size, tone down the AquaNet, and rethink the makeup, girl. Mama’s looking mighty desperate.
HE: Has apparently converted to her religion, which requires that all clothing fit so tightly that it restricts movement and possibly breathing. Also, that suit looks really shiny and the hem on the pants is too high. Also, he looks like a total douchebag. Score: 3/10. Mostly because he looks like a total douchebag.
Combined Score: 4/10. We sincerely hope everyone at this party pointed and laughed at them until they both ran out in tears.
Yes, we need more coffee.
[Photo Credit: WENN, stylebop.com, neimanmarcus.com]