Girl, That’s Not Your Look: Jennifer Morrison

Posted on October 01, 2012

We don’t know, you guys. We watched the season 2 premiere of “Once Upon a Time” last night, and while we were never terribly captivated by the show, we usually found ourselves just interested enough in what’s going to happen next to keep tuning in, on a casual basis. But for some reason, it all looked a little silly to us last night. And Disney-owned ABC has every right to define fairy tales through a Disney lens, but the appearance of Mulan was just a bit too much corporate branding synergy for us to take. There’s way too much going on on Sunday night television, so we think we’re gonna drop this one and catch up to it later if we hear anything good.

In other news, Jennifer Morrison still doesn’t know how to dress herself.

Jennifer Morrison attends the premiere of ‘Stars In Shorts’ in New York City.

Oh, GIRL.

INVEST IN A MIRROR AND A SASSY GAY TO TELL YOU WHAT IT WON’T.

Pack this look up, take it outside, put it on your lawn, and set it on fire.

 

[Photo Credit: Getty]

    • miagain

      Oh for God’s sake!!!

    • Judy_J

      Unbelievably bad from head to toe.

    • JMB_edits

      Did she think “Stars in Shorts” was the movie name or the dress code?

      • http://gabyrippling.tumblr.com/ Gabriella M

        Dammit, beat me to it.

        • YoungSally

          Me too, but I think it refers to the films as shorts…..she needs sassy gay who understands irony.

          • http://gabyrippling.tumblr.com/ Gabriella M

            It’s definitely referring to the films as shorts.

          • charlotte

             One of the movies has Lily Tomlin and Jesse Tyler Ferguson starring as mother and son. I’m pumped!

            • YoungSally

              Perfect — love me JTF — first saw him about 12 years ago in a production at Manhattan Theater Club called NewYorkers….he was a gay club kid type. Hysterical.

    • Tatiana Luján

      She’s so gorgeous and never seems to know how to dress.

    • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

      oh. my. god.  Aside from the figure obliteration going on. the boots are WAY too heavy, and that uber-twee pearl embroidered peter pan collar is HILARIOUSLY awful on her.

      • Glammie

        Yeah, the top half is Emily Dickinson and the bottom is dykes on bikes.  Wow, it’s so bad in so many, many ways that it is funny.

    • Sobaika

      Aww I don’t know, I liked adding Mulan. The actress was awful, but I’m all for adding more characters/fairy tales. The show has always been a bit silly, therein lies the fun (for me).

      As for JMo, it’s ludicrous that she voluntarily dresses this way. I remember seeing pictures of her running a marathon and she has this impeccable little body that would look great in pretty much anything. Dressing yourself shouldn’t be this hard, especially with your paycheck.

      • RebeccaKW

         Like the series premiere, before she goes to Storybrooke, she meets that guy at dinner in that sexy pink dress.  If you look THAT good in something like that, why would you ever agree to wear this?

      • MilaXX

        If they are going this route I’m hoping they go full on ridiculous and own this. Mulan didn’t bother me as much either.

      • kimmeister

        Who played Mulan?

        • Sobaika

          Jamie Chung.

      • http://twitter.com/omg_dora Dora K.

        I thought season 1 did a pretty good job of staying just barely on the right side of silly. It only slipped into full-blown cartoonishness in that awful dwarfs & fairies episode. I am very disappointed to hear about the introduction of Mulan and it has pretty much killed my desire to watch season 2. :-

    • http://www.facebook.com/pj.bryant.5 Pj Bryant

      Could handle the collar, maybe the boots, definitely not the hair or shorts 

    • Anathema_Device

      And this photo looks like it was taken in a back alley. Maybe she knew how bad she looked and tried to sneak in through the back door?

    • dress_up_doll

      The filthy wall and sidewalk are not helping matters. It looks awful and so does she.

    • Billie_Dawn

      I know they probably used Mulan because of the Disney thing, but I didn’t mind so much, considering that the Mulan tale is centuries old. It’s more or less the Chinese equivalent of a fairy tale, and if it means that they’re going outside the usual European battery of characters, I’m okay with that.

      That said, if Simba shows up, I’m going to be annoyed.

      • Sobaika

        My friends and I were joking last night that someone was going to end up with pet kittens named Simba and Nala.

        • Pinup Ghoul

           I’m surprised that no one in Storybrook has a cat named Duchess, actually.

      • Celandine1

        Thanks for this. So many people have been complaining across the internet about selling out to Disney but I think most of them have no idea that the Mulan story is a Chinese folk tale. Of course if the show runners want to branch out to other cultures, there aren’t many non-European stories well known. This story is, thanks to it being Disney-fied. My best friend and I watched this episode last night and discussed the Mulan inclusion. I discovered that he thought all those major fairy tales (Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, etc.) were original Disney stories! He is a smart guy with kids so it makes me think how many people out there are very unaware.  Another poster complained that Ariel better not show up … I imagine a lot of people probably think Disney invented that story too.

        • AnneElliot

          The evil queen made a crack about a mermaid to Rumplestiltskin in one episode.  I’m sure she’ll show up eventually. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Patrick-Cleary/1201575213 Patrick Cleary

      And why would you agree to being photographed in what looks like a urine-stained back alley? 

    • MissMariRose

      WTF?

    • SewingSiren

      It’s a cute look, but not for her. Maybe Zooey Deschanel or Katy Perry, but better still someone like Willow Smith or in her age range.

    • Judy_S

      I think her head looks beautiful, but as if it had been grafted onto somebody else’s body (maybe that of an ironically twee teenager). Definition of “not your look.”

    • Funkykatt

      Mr. Blackwell is gone, she can’t be on his list (if that’s what she’s going for).

    • janetjb

      Except for her makeup this look belongs to a 13-16 year old.

    • MoHub

      It’s the combination of the over-embellished white Peter Pan collar with the steampunk boots that grates on me. And the shorts only make it worse.

    • nannypoo

      I’ve never seen this person before. I thought her face looked a little old for her outfit so I looked her up. She’s 33, for god’s sake. What an idiotic fashion choice.

      • KELLEYKAT

        I agree!  I wondered how old she is.  Thanks for looking it up!  Stupid outfit for a 30+.  There are so many GREAT choices, how she thought this was good is sad.  Just sad.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      Wow-that just strikes me as a tragic “Sister Wives on the Wild Side” look, and that ain’t good.

    • mjude

      LMFAO…thanks boys i needed that!

    • rhl25

      Oh, this distresses me. Not the look – though it is tragical in both thought and deed. But that you guys won’t be covering this show. I managed to jerry-rig a somewhat stable internet connection enough to watch the premiere, and I loved it. 

      How could you not get weepy when Prince Hotness looked at Emma like his daughter for the first time? I know I was meant to be awww-ing at Snow’s tearful hug, but his face is what got me. 

      For that alone, I’m watching this show. 

      And yes, Mulan -the actress- was not my favourite. But there’s always hope. She could burst into a rendition of ‘I’ll Make A Man Out Of You.” 

      HOPE!

      • Jennifer Coleman

        Yeah, I shed an invisible tear when Ma & Pa Charming hugged their daughter too.

      • formerlyAnon

        Yeah, I think it’s past time for this show to have a musical episode. WITH dancing, thank-you very much. ETA: Which thought pretty much admits that I can’t take this show at all seriously as a dramatic conceit, but that I enjoy bits of its ridiculousness enough to keep watching casually anyway.

    • jw_ny

      Took the “stars in shorts” title too literally. 

      When I saw the thumbnail, I thought the top & collar was going to be the issue.  Little did I realize that it was going to be the best part of the look.  lol.

    • http://twitter.com/SparklyCasanova UglyCasanova

      Kill it with fire!

    • Miss_Led

      Wowwwww, that is awful.

    • quiltrx

      Quaker punk?

    • Larkin21

      I know that braids and “pinterest” hair styles are getting a lot of crap but I do love her hair here. The outfit, though … Nope.

    • http://gabyrippling.tumblr.com/ Gabriella M

      Why is Jennifer Morrison stealing from Michelle WIlliams’s closet? Totally different wheelhouses. I want those boots, but for a different outfit (one more along Prada retro-70s lines than along 1960s YSL lines).
      Also, it has to be said: “Stars in Shorts” was not a dress-theme suggestion, dear.

    • piecesofconfetti

      Oh god. Horrible. She doesn’t even need a sassy gay to tell her this looks bad. A random passerby on the street would be able to tell this looks bad. Terrible.

    • LLuL

      Not sure whether to go with *cringe* or *lol* in this case.  Give me 30 seconds while I process…okay, LOL it is!

    • VRuss

      Either get the gay friend, or pay a stylist!

      This is seriously bad.

    • unbornfawn

      Disaster head to toe.

    • Jennifer Coleman

      I was going to comment on that blah-colored jumpsuit yesterday but forgot to. Jennifer is about as far removed from Twee as possible, yet she went for this getup. Such a shame.
      She has a real definable look to her that she is not addressing AT ALL and it’s bothering me. She has a retro-style face, in the vein of  Maggie Gyllenhall (not that she looks like her, but you could find both these girls’ faces in a 1955 yearbook easily). Maggie goes for an offbeat style that plays off her distinctiveness (sure, she’s mostly not successful, but I do like the direction and costumers usually get it right for her). Jennifer should not dress in the generic styles that 98% starlets go for, but find a niche that suits her strong face to a tee. 
      Of course, she needs professionals to attempt this. 

    • BuffaloBarbara

      … what?

      Who dressed her?  And why in that?  I am fundamentally confused by this outfit.  Pilgrim centerfold?  Funeral for fitness guru which will include memorial calisthenics?  

      • formerlyAnon

         Is it very, very wrong that I immediately began to envision a very Busby Berkeley-esque memorial service for Richard Simmons?

        Seriously, there is SCOPE in that idea . . .

    • SignLadyB

      I made the same comment about Mulan on the Revenge post earlier. I really enjoyed Once Upon a Time last year and can only think of one Disney tie in (and it was minor enough that I can’t recollect what it was now). But Mulan really turned me off. What next? Ariel?

    • formerlyAnon

      Dreadful. This is a look that under-25s can experiment with, but even most of them will look silly.

    • http://twitter.com/lenabena_ Elena

      I swear she has worn this exact outfit before. Either that, or I’m having deja vu.

    • http://twitter.com/MandySCG MandyJane

      I’m sure your TV dance card is already pretty full, but I think you guys might like 666 Park Avenue. I watched it out of curiosity last night, thinking it would probably be terrible, but I actually enjoyed it. It’s like a creepy soap opera with really good production values, and decent actors! 

    • RebeccaKW

      The sweater might work with some jeans, different hair.  The boots…I appreciate a good pair of boots, but I’m not sold on these and never with shorts.  

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/DNWEFT2SVBX5T3NPMROQCT4U2U jennyv

      Amish on the top, Eddie Munster on the bottom.

    • Joyce VG

      this is amazingly ill advised

    • jjfg

      Girl….  Wow.  

    • MilaXX

      SET. IT. ON. FIRE.
      Hair -bad
      Sweater – okay
      Shortv- bad
      Boots – bad
      White bag – WTF?
      Everything all together – one of the ugliest, most unflattering outfits I have seen in a very long time.

    • Jessi03

      I like the boots, at least?

    • Pants_are_a_must

      Girl, not even Miley Cyrus would, and that’s the harshest thing I could tell you.

    • HobbitGirl

      That’s a really literal take on her movie. And unflattering to boot.

    • LesYeuxHiboux

      I think it’s pretty funny that this star wore shorts to Stars in Shorts. That said, there are better ways to do shorts. She looks like a chorus girl in a musical version of The Addams Family.

    • AnaRoW

      Mulan is actually based on a Chinese legend so she belongs just as much as Lancelot and some of the other characters coming down the pike. I actually stopped watching the show last season once I realized they weren’t really going anywhere with the story.  I just finished a children’s book series called the Sisters Grimm, which is similar to OUAT but with more depth, plot, and better characterization.

      I really have nothing to say about how Ms. Morrison looks here that hasn’t already been said.

      • AnneElliot

        My girls loved The Sisters Grimm series!  

    • afabulous50

      Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    • AudreysMom

      the only thing that redeems this picture in close-up is the view of Hiddleston over her shoulder. 

    • deltabronze

      I wish she’d go back to dark hair, which was gorgeous on her. The brassy blonde doesn’t do her any favors.

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      See, this just annoys me.  You’re beautiful, you’re rich, you have the money – HIRE A STYLIST!!!  Why do these starlets just keep making the same mistake over and over again?

    • ojosazules

      She reminds of of Rita Hayworth, look wise. 
      What the fuckity fuck is up here? 

    • Cheesely

      Her hair color is so atrocious! I looks like she used hydrogen peroxide and color-matched it to those bendy-tab closure envelopes your report cards used to come in.

    • https://twitter.com/LisaF1163 Lisa

      Girl, this is not ANYONE’S look!

      And I agree about introducing Mulan on OUAT.  It just smacks of corporate synergy/trying too hard.  I worked for ABC Television in the mid-90s when Disney took over, and it was immediate “ABC/Disney Synergy” everywhere we looked.  About a year after they took over, on our pay stubs, they began printing ads for the most recent movies they were plugging sort of “watermark” style behind the date and the pay amount. So out of the pay envelope, I literally pull out an ad with a picture of Glenn Close as Cruella DeVil from “101 Dalmations”, and printed ON that, my pay amount and the date of the pay cycle. It was ridonkulous!  

    • Trisha26

      I only saw the top at first and thought she was auditioning for “downstairs” on Downton Abbey – but then the shorts shouted English Boys School. Dressing as a pun on the film title is one thing but this? No.

    • DaringMiss

      Ok…question to the other Bitter Kittens…

      At what age must a woman stop wearing Doc Martens or other punky lace up boots?

      • http://twitter.com/Alloyjane Alloy Jane

        I don’t really think there’s a deadline or expiration date for that kinda thing.  If you can work those items into what you’re wearing and pull them off, then there you are.  But if you’re putting on the club kid boots with the teeny plaid skirt and overtight t-shirt with jelly bracelets and too much mascara, that’s something else.  But if boots that buckle all the way to the top are part of your sensibility, why would you want to shelve them?

    • Tatiana Luján

      I shudder when I see high boots paired with shorts. It looks like a hooker’s outfit.
      Here, it looks like she tried to tone down the hooker effect with the sweater and the hairdo, but the whole thing just looks ridiculous.

    • http://twitter.com/iraki86 IraKi

      It makes her look so fat. And that is saying something considering the facct that there are many overweight girls out there who do not look fat. Am I making sense? 

    • ZnSD

      uh, was she auditioning for the role of the maid on AHS?

    • http://twitter.com/#!/Space_Kitty Space Kitty

      Oh, that’s… not good.

    • MzzPants

      Oy Veh.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2CNDPMVO4W23R5TVC2QMTJ5BZE Heather

      I think her boots are cute – I have a similar pair, from Miz Mooz, and get lots of compliments on them. But the overall Pilgrim Look is not good.

    • http://twitter.com/Ms_Rena Rena

      Oh my god I actually laughed out LOUD when I scrolled down… Just hideous hahahaaa

    • ccm800

      so THIS is where the rest of Heidi’s dress got to?! I wonder how she got if off of her!  

    • BradWatson

      Yep, Mu-Lan was the tipping point for me too.  Hubby still likes it, but I think I’m moving out of Storybrook for good.

      • AnneElliot

        They’re starting to run out of fairytale characters.  Mulan was a bit of a stretch for me too.  However, it’s one of the few shows I can watch with my kids, so I haven’t given up yet.

    • neofashionista

      AWFUL
      and i dont know her but did she get bit by a shark she has a really bad scar on her left thigh

    • http://twitter.com/BrienneCalmer Brienne Calmer

      This is a look calculated to get her thrown out of Downton Abbey.

      Speaking of which, TLo, Y U NO RECAP DOWNTON ABBEY?

    • poketom

      Pack it up and send it to chloë, who will wear it with the addition of some suspenders, one up, one hanging off the side. 

    • http://twitter.com/Alloyjane Alloy Jane

      From the waist aaaall the way to that braid, she’s grandma.  Those shorts are pure Pinnochio.  Starting below the knee, she’s a very practical, grandma-loving Hollywood Blvd hooker.

    • TieDye64

      Christ on crackers, HIRE A (good) STYLIST.

    • Aurumgirl

      Waist up, she looks like my nonna did, braided hair so white it started to turn blonde again.

    • http://twitter.com/debikayo Deb Oswald

      Good lord.  Get her a coat

    • Jessica O’Connell

      This is…horrifically bad. Wow.

    • PhillipWilde

      She’s dressed like an Amish prostitute.