Cover Girl: Keira Knightley for FLARE Magazine

Posted on October 30, 2012

Not gonna lie, kittens. We’re sluggish today. It got a little Grey Gardens ’round these parts last night, with us, plus the three cats huddled on the sectional, fighting for space to sleep through the storm because none of us wanted to be upstairs. And by “sleep,” we mean “not sleep at all.” There isn’t enough coffee in the world to get us charged up today. In fact, we kinda feel how Keira looks here:

 

Keira Knightley covers the December 2012 issue of FLARE magazine photographed by Terry Tsiolis in a Tom Ford dress.

 

Except she can make exhaustion look chic as hell while we, sad mortals, are relegated to fuzzy-faced mumbling and puffiness.

 

 

 

 

[Photo Credit: Terry Tsiolis for Flare]

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  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

    Kiera is a gal that gives good face.  But that hair and couture straight jacket she is wearing is just not right. 

    • elleg929

      The first thing I thought of was “fancy straight jacket.”  She looks like a slightly glamorous mental patient.

      • mmc2315

        Yep, I thought that too!  Despite it, there is something about this look that I like very much.

      • kschwarting

        Yup, my first thought was “chic mental patient.”

    • gabbilevy

      Truly. That’s some crazy person hair and makeup. Or… it looks that way because of the straight jacket. 

  • zuzu

    Slap a couple of Cinnabons on her head, and you’ve got Princess Leia.

    • MissMariRose

       Mmmm, Cinnabons.

      Excuse me, I’ll be right back.

      • Funkykatt

        I’ve never had one. I fear them. 

        • DeborahJozayt

          Good instinct. They’re so syrupy sweet you’ll gain 2 cavities just looking at them.

        • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2CNDPMVO4W23R5TVC2QMTJ5BZE Heather

          Diabetic coma.

        • turtleemily

           I had a friend who worked at one… It really is best to stay away.

    • Laylalola

      I was genuinely confused when my mother years ago had me watch Love, Actually with her — I kept saying, that’s Natalie Portman, right? Is that Natalie Portman with blonde hair or not? She’s not that tall, is she?

      • luciaphile

        Which is probably why she got cast to play Padme Amidala’s double in that dreck Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. Take my word for it and don’t waste your time. It’s a ghastly movie.

        • J. Preposterice

          I heard that when KK and NP were in the Amidala makeup, no one could tell them apart, not even KK’s mother.  Just a rumor but I’d believe it; when I saw the movie I figured they were doing some kind of split screen thing for the double and having NP play both roles.  

          • luciaphile

            I read an interview with Knightley who pretty much said that regarding the mother thing.

          • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2CNDPMVO4W23R5TVC2QMTJ5BZE Heather

            That’s interesting, b/c I think KK is tall and NP is teeny.

      • tsid2012

        They do have a very similiar looks but IMHO, KK has better screen presence most of the time (PoftC notwithstanding), I still love her in the first movie I saw her in, “Bend it like Beckham”.  She had a great, charming energy in that movie.

    • Indovina

      This was exactly where my mind went, too.

    • turtleemily

       Damn, beat me to it!

    • StillGary

      They are kind of like porn — really decadent and awesome for the first few bites and then you realize how nasty and kind of boring they are. 

  • Lisa Dugan

    Gorgeous face.  Hair is tragic.

  • elemspbee

    hi TnLo. thank you for pushing on despite a rough night of the hurricane pounding your very foundation. hope you can call it a day soon.

  • Qitkat

    That is a rough haircut framing her beautiful face. I do like the dress and the unusual pose for a magazine cover. With usual crazy-ass cover blurbs *Make-him-insane lingerie* LOL

    Sounds like a rough night that deserves some extra special coddling of each other and the kitties today. The BK’s sympathize and suggest minimal posting during recovery. It’s only fair we don’t complain. Get some rest boys ;-)

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/J2VE4NE2FY2BP4QD2XOYKJGLPI Laura

    Awful. This is the kind of stuff with her that drives me crazy. 

  • decormaven

    So we’re inspired to throw out the tinsel & put on our party frocks with THIS cover? Grief!
    Hey guys, you’re due a free pass today. Do something soothing & pet the kitties. The fashion world will still be spinning tomorrow, if the fates allow. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Patrick-Cleary/1201575213 Patrick Cleary

    It’s weird that her face is floating a few inches away from any of the rest of her body like that, and yet, they managed to make her hair look dry, brittle, and badly-styled on purpose.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=12801074 Brett Hulst

       her neck must be like the water creature in The Abyss

    • http://kingderella.tumblr.com/ kingderella

      another creepily anatomy-challenged cover…

    • kimmeister

      Yes, this would defintely not work for Chiropractic Weekly (if there were such a magazine).

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/KBNJ6GJTXYEE6BON3WGK6KEGT4 Elizabeth

      I had the same thought; her head is disembodied. TLo’s recent editorial post about her also featured the strange, floating head (was it a Vogue editorial … gorgeous dresses, very high fashion)? Maybe she’s just a jaw thruster or something? Did anybody see that film “A Dangerous Method” with Viggo Mortenson and Michael Fassbender? I thought poor Keira was going to actually break her jaw in that film.

    • mshesterp

      Yes!  I thought her head was creepily attached to her neck.  Don’t understand the pose at all.  The cover weirds me out.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/6A6URLYJ4G72YHZYOLNTWOMYBE Kimberly C

    Ennui. She haz it.

  • http://kingderella.tumblr.com/ kingderella

    “high-end hairdressers are just so expensive. so i just let them do the right side of my head for half the prize, and i do the left side myself at home. looks almost the same, no?”

    no wonder they put her in a straight-jacket.

  • schadenfreudelicious

    akk, its like some 3-D floating head (in dire need of a hot oil treatment) popping off my screen…

  • TieDye64

    Girl is gorgeous, but the cover isn’t exactly serving up holiday cheer. Glad you guys are alright. I bet a nap is sounding good.

  • http://twitter.com/MajorBedhead MajorBedhead

    She personifies vapid to me – no idea why, but she does.

    Interesting cover for a holiday edition. Perhaps that’s what we’ll all look like after rounds of family gatherings. Exhausted and ready for the loony bin. 

  • MilaXX

    The photo is weird. It looks like they took the head off, reduced the size of the body, then pasted the now too large head back on.

  • http://twitter.com/GuidosDaddy Jason M. Galloway

    Throw some big jewelry on her and she could be Luisa  Casati…

  • SewingSiren

    Perfect Halloween cover. She looks ravishing!

  • ShivaDiva

    Football head!  She’s reminding me of a cartoon character that escapes me at the moment.  A girl with similar frizzled hair that makes her head sort of like the CBS eye.

    • ShivaDiva

      Dora the Explorer!  That’s the one.

    • librarygrrl64

      I was thinking “scary Bratz doll.”

  • Andrew Schroeder

    “Anna Karenina meet Oscar” my ass.

  • Judih1

    Did they take a photo of her head and a photo of her body seperately and the merge them together? Something looks off

    • Judy_J

      Looks that way to me, too.

  • Trisha26

    Mental patient chic. And by chic I mean not chic.

  • LauraWL

    She looks like she is about to drop dead. It reminds me of a line from New Girl last week said by the Nick Miller character: “Is that shoe polish around your eyes? I will never understand women…” 

  • B_C_J

    O.k. – it’s editorial – so it demands to be viewed from a different perspective. Yes, she commands attention. Ms. Knightly understands how to communicate via a camera lens but otherwise it’s only noteworthy because of the unbecoming hair.  The dress hints at being interesting but it’s hard to tell given her pose. On the cover of the magazine they are referencing her role in the remake of Anna Karenina so perhaps they are trying to show her versatility and have therefore styled her as edgy as possible in stark juxtaposition to her period look in the movie. 

  • Lattis

    us, plus the three cats huddled on the sectional, fighting for space to sleep through the storm because none of us wanted to be upstairs.

    I’ve never had a cat who was upset by storms and I’ve never had a dog who wasn’t. During a storm my dog is like Humphrey Bogart’s line, “She tried to sit on my lap while I was standing up.”

    • Lattis

      Hit post too soon. Meant to also say – I am glad you all are ok, TLo. And everyone else in Sandy’s way – sending love and support your way.

  • Judy_J

    Her head is at a weird angle, like it’s been photoshopped onto somone else’s body.

    • AnneElliot

      Yes, definitely.  It’s sort of floating above her body like it’s disconnected.  

  • Rrroza

    Straitjacket for the holidays? Festive!

  • http://cheekypinky.wordpress.com/ Rebecca

    “Princess Leia Says ‘FUCK OFF’ to Her Cinnamon Buns”.

  • Vera L-

    beautiful eyes, she looks like Rachel Weisz in this picture. 

    Sister needs a sandwich – STAT

  • Frank Li

    Having uber face-giving skills doesn’t get her the right to appear as a mental patient.

  • http://profiles.google.com/dorothymichael Dorothy & Michael n/a

    This looks like one of my Barbie dolls back in the 60′s when one of my brothers decided to give it a haircut and move it’s head slightly off the connecting joint. Or whatever you call it, that kept the head above the shoulders.

  • ThaliaMenninger

    Mental patient chic?

  • Anathema_Device

    Eh, she looks like one of those dashboard bobble head dogs. In fancy clothes.

  • joything

    They cut off Princess Leia’s cinnamon buns!  Those bastards!

  • http://twitter.com/foodycatAlicia foodycatAlicia

    It’s a bit One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest to be chic for me. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Louise-Bryan/1177213326 Louise Bryan

    Did you guys at least have a coffee shop to go to?  All retail establishments in our little NJ town were closed, even Unkind Donuts.

    Oh, Keira? Always gorgeous, all the time. What more is there to say?

  • StillGary

    “Shroud” comes to mind.

  • unbornfawn

    Patient in a psych ward?

  • AtticWife

    The photoshop wonks cut her head off and re-attached it just an iiiiinch too far to the left. Bah. Tuck your chin, baby girl.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sarah-Adams/1143985903 Sarah Adams

    Princess Leia on a very bad day?

  • quiltrx

    Honey, give it up.  That part went to Angelina Jolie YEARS ago.  And your neck looks broken. And eat a sandwich.

  • texashistorian

    Is her head a latex balloon or something?! Creepy!!!

  • librarygrrl64

    Her head is disconcerting here. It looks literally cut-and-pasted onto her neck. Creepy.