Vanessa Hudgens in Notte by Marchesa

Posted on September 11, 2012

There’ve been a lot of “pretty girl” posts lately; light on the bitchery, heavy on the “doesn’t she look pretty” compliment-paying; partially because we’re busy as hell and it’s just easier and quicker to be nice, and partially because the ladystars really do seem to be on their best behavior lately.

It’s time we rectified that, don’t you think?

Vanessa Hudgens attends the premiere of ‘Spring Breakers’ during the 2012 Toronto International Film Festival in a Notte by Marchesa gown paired with a clutch and sandals by Jimmy Choo.

Jimmy Choo ‘Cayla’ Clutch

Jimmy Choo ‘Greta’ Sandal

Hi Vanessa. We hate your dress. We hate the color. We hate that you are dressed like you’re going to your prom in 1987 and you probably weren’t even a zygote back then. We hate your cheap-looking purse. We hate that you chose a Wonder Woman cuff when this is the wrong kind of dress for such a fierce thing. We hate your pinterest nails.  We hate your car accident hair. And we hate that the bustline gives you witchy boobs.

Wow. That felt GREAT! We think our skin just cleared up!


[Photo Credit: Getty]

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  •  Hey, don’t you hate her shoes, too?   Actually, i kinda like the color of her dress for her, but pretty much every other thing about this is a drag, and not in a good way.  Did her stylist just throw some shit at her, and push her out the door?

    • Maybe this is one of those big events where the designers & jewelers set up shop in hotel rooms and just let the stars come pick stuff out. Because this looks like Vanessa went, “Ooh! I like this! And this! And this!” and did not use a stylist.

  • I LIKE IT! the nails and purse and clutch are a mess, but I really like that colour on her and I think her makeup and hair look fab. 
    But I guess that’s why TLO has a book deal and I don’t! 🙂

    •  I like her hair, too! First thing I said when I saw the picture. The nails are a travesty, though.

    • kschwarting

      I agree on the color–I think it’s a good bright for her, even if she got the accessories wrong. 

  • Ugly color, but that is nothing compared to the tackiness of nails  ( NAILS!), purse, shoes and everything else going on. 

  • MintaHallWriter

    Yeah. But I like her shoes.  which you can’t really see.


  • ballerinawithagun

    How does Jimmy Choo manage to make a pair of shoes look like they are from Payless?

    • They actually look just like the shoes in the ‘look like stripper shoes but really are meant for prom’ section at my local shoe warehouse.

      • Introspective

        those things always make my eyes twitch. heavy on glitter and lucite and light on taste. at baker’s for $29.99, sure. but jimmy choo for $1000 a pop? that’s just tragic.

  • Laylalola

    Huh. Well, see, I think she looks better than half the women getting werqs around here the past few days.

    • ArtSchoolDropOut

      I think it’s a taste level thing. The recent werqs have all had fabulous gowns that have been styled to near perfection. This outfit reads kind of tacky, especially with the nails and the awful clutch. I think overall Vanessa looks cute, but the whole point of this blog, if I’ve got this right, is to deconstruct and critique what celebs are wearing. 

  • teensmom99

    I have to disagree.  Bottom line is she looks beautiful.  The dress fits beautifully except for the fact that it is sweeping the floor.  Color isn’t fantastic but if any one can wear that color she can.  I like this much more than Kate Hudson’s alleged WERQ.

  • dress would be more interesting on Viola Davis.

    • Ooh, interesting! I’d like to see that.  But then again, aren’t MOST dresses more interesting on Viola Davis?  I say yes. 

  • Ryan Williamson

    It’s weird. It’s not like there’s really anything wrong with this dress but I hate it too. 

  • HomeOfficeGirl

    Agree – the accessories are crap and nails and shoes are tacky.  But the dress?  It’s ok.  Another pretty girl in a pretty dress.  Can’t hate on that.

  • I will say that–for her–this is pretty fantastic.  She is typically in lace pants and fringe, so I think this is proof she cleans up rather nicely, albeit, not what most lady stars would wear.  

  • DinaSews

    Pinterest nails!! Love it.  Thanks for the early morning bitchiness.  I needed that chuckle.

    • Reneesance

      Pinterest nails also made me snort my coffee.  Thanks TLo!

  • I love the cuff. And I did wear that colour to a prom in 1987.

  • Anna Tree

    I don’t loathe the dress but that bag is ghastly.

  • MilaXX

    I don’t hate the dress even if it is a little prom-y. I think the color is good on her.Makeup is good but hair is also a bit prom-y & she’s making duck face. That said the accessories are  all wrong, including the gift with purchase looking bag.

  • Judy_S

    Well, though, you have to admit, she would be a huge hit at that 1987 prom. I liked her down to about the knees, though all your criticisms are alas quite just.

  • kat89

    Compared to what she usually looks like, this is a step up. I don’t hate the dress or the color. She can pull both off with her coloring. I hate the nails though. After seeing her in those lace bell bottoms that I will never be able to unsee no matter how hard I try, a 1987 prom dress is totally forgivable.

    • kimmeister

      I agree – grading on a curve compared to how she usually dresses, this is a werq for her.  I do have to agree that the nails are horrid though.

  • BelladonnaRising

    Everything from the wrist to the finger is a f-ing mess, including that clutch. Animal print with fuschia? This whole situation is Worst Of The 80s. Except her hair; it looks a lot like mine when I haven’t showered in a day or I’ve run out of shampoo. And the shoes…oh I have no words. 

  • Jennifer Coleman

    “Pinterest nails”? *dropping dead now”
    This dress is the exact color of a improperly fitted strapless bridesmaid frock foisted on me in 1990. At least her boobs are not out on super display as mine were.
    But yeah, this whole outfit is time-travel tragic.

  • Ok… but don’t you think this is kinda the best she’s looked in a while? Not a nasty fringe purse or cutoffs in sight! This is perfectly polished for her. 

  • I like the dress a lot…for a prom dress. 

  • annie_wonder

    Could do without the cuff but the rest looks young and fun to me to be honest!

  • Verascity

    Really? Wow. I think she looks fab.

  • neofashionista

    Fabulous post gentleman couldnt agree more!

  • The dress is dreadful! It looks like barbie’s shower curtain and don’t get me started on the nails. The clutch couldv’e been saved by another outfit, something a bit more urban… But this… just… no.

  • lolaleen

    And we hate that your face is a different color from the rest of your body!

  • i thought she looks cute.

  • schadenfreudelicious

    just choked on my coffee over the “pinterest nails” comment.. when will this gawd awful nail fad ever end?…..

    • PinkLemon

       hate hate hate hate with the fire of a thousand suns.

      • schadenfreudelicious

        they are like some unholy union of Etsy and Lee Press On Nails……

        • PinkLemon


  • EditKitten

    I don’t “hate” the dress, either, but every. Single. Accessory. is wrong. And those nails need to die.

  • meowing

    and the cheap looking clutch is $1,150.  I didn’t have the heart to find the price on the shoes or the dress.  Give me that money, and even fashion-challenged as I am, I could do better.  Dismissed.

  • I love the color, and I’d like the dress if it were knee length instead of full length. LOVE the wonder woman cuffs and ring. Don’t like the nails with this outfit, but generally i love nail art, so YMMV, and I hate the purse because it looks like a Claire’s special. i think if it were cocktail length, the hair would work too, because it would be a little less formal than this gown. But I’m sleep, so…

  • I really don’t like this child regardless of what she wears. It all looks ugly all the time.  

  • Aurumgirl

    I think we have to brace ourselves.  The mall nails will be on every red carpet, on every little starlet, from now on.

    • Squarah

      I remember lots of pearl clutching when starlets first started wearing nail colors like black or blue or silver on the red carpet, and now no one bats an eye. If the trend lasts long enough, people will get used to it and it will be the new normal. Personally, I love it. The whole red carpet thing is so overly serious; it’s nice to have a little levity and silliness.

  • jw_ny

    The cuff, purse, and her nails are the most offensive parts of this look, for me anyways..really don’t go at all with the gown.  The entire look just has a random tacky feel to it.

    I don’t love the color of the gown nor the witchy boobs, however I appreciate that she did wear a color.  I’m bored with black and white. 

    I do like her hair…a controlled, messy. styled, up-do. Her makeup, although heavy, is pretty…too much for that flowy gown tho.

  • Sara__B

    Witchy boobs. Witchy boobs? I’ve been looking at her boobs waaaaay more than I ever wanted to and I still can’t figure it out. Help! (I actually think she looks very pretty — for a 17-year-old from the local high school. Not for a red carpet celebrity. She looks like she bought everything at the mall.)

    • kimmeister

      I think the boobs are witchy because the bustline is pointed.

  • Anathema_Device

    Aww, I don’t hate it. I like the color, especially on her. And she is SO fashion-challenged most of the time, I give her credit for being a little more polished. I agree on the the accessories, hair, and my new favorite phrase “Pinterest nails.” (Oy, that site used to be sooooo much better.)

  • PinkLemon

    the biggest offense was the naming of that clutch….albeit ugly…’Cayla’….gross.

  • LesYeuxHiboux

    Don’t hold back, boys! The color of the dress looks nice with her coloring, but I hate in general. It’s hurting my eyes at this early morning hour. Hate the cuff with this dress and the clutch, period. I feel like she always aims for a mishmash of earth-mama and femme-fatale and overshoots off a cliff into trashy 80’s-hair-metal-video-skank. 

  • The top of that dress is squashing her boobs so that they’re cockeyed. Cockeyed, squashed boobs is definitely not a good look. I like the color and for a Marchesa dress, that’s positively understated. But the nails! Ohmahholyhell, the nails! And the clutch. And the shoes. And the hair. Good lord. 


  • DinahR

    Actually, she looks pretty and cute to my eyes!  I love the color on her and that dress. I’m not into those nails, but it doesn’t bug me that much.  I’m used to seeing that sort of thing on people these days. Oh, I must be a tacky gal…  

  • BrooklynBomber

    Oh, I’m so relieved. Because although I’m pre-disposed to hate Marchesa, this doesn’t necessarily look like a Marchesa dress, and still I hate it it. It’s awful. It’s so been-there-done-that, so unsophisticated, so Zsa Zsa.

  • Don’t forget the pet moth on her finger. Ew.

  • janetjb

    She looks more put together than usual and I like the color on her, but the accessories are bad.

  • Imasewsure

    I like her nails because she is young … the rest I hate

  • Joyce VG

    Ummm….at least she doesn’t look like a heroin addicted flower child.  I actually think she looks lovely.  But then again I’m not fabulous and famous fashion bloggers…so what do I know.

  • TheOriginalLulu

    *removes sweater in exact same color and quietly disposes of it and will now declare forever that I hate that color*

    Just Kidding.

    I don’t really like anything here either, except the shoes. The dress kinda does look like an 80s prom dress and the color isn’t helping. The eye makeup is also adding to the bad 80s vibe. I wouldn’t mind the hair if she were out running errands, but not with a gown like this.

  • L.

    Partial disagree:  I LIKE the color on her and the fit is great.  Yes, the dress is a bit prom-y, but the shoes and cuff take and unkempt hair keep the look from being too elderly, or too 80’s on her.  The plastic purse, tacky nails and junior high eyeliner were bad calls, tho.

    • Tatiana Luján

      I agree. That color looks great on her.

  • PastryGoddess

    Oh great, so now Marchesa has a diffusion line.  God give me strength

  • Sarah Thomas

    Get over the nail art thing, guys. It didn’t come from a magazine, it didn’t come as a dictate from the Fashion Gods, and it didn’t come from a man. The knee-jerk dismissal is cheap and unlike you two. It’s not going away, so evaluate. 

  • MarissaLG

    The color is way too extreme, but I don’t hate this look. I think she could have done without the cuff, but come on, it’s not that bad. 

  • another_laura

    I hate the whole thing and I could use a little help with my skin so hey, I’m right in there with TLo:  GAWDAWFUL!!

  • EEKstl

    “…pinterest nails…” HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.  And for the record: Yes, I realize this is the 2nd comment in a row where I’ve just copied and pasted something you wrote above and said it was funny.  What I’m lacking in originality you’re more than making up for in sharp wit.

  • marilyn

    She looks fine.  The only thing I don’t like is the manicure.  It is a little too ‘hello kitty’ for me.

  • i think i actually did wear this dress to my junior prom in 1965.  but wait, my mom would never have let me out of the house in that neckline.  her hair and makeup look like the end of a long hot day in junior high.  and her manicure is tragic;  not because it’s nail art, because it’s bad nail art.  looks like fourteen layers of guncky white glittering paint under cheap rhinestones.

  • Warmheartedgirl Seattle

    The nails, that butt ugly purse, and those horrid shoes did it for me.  The dress is meh.  Hate the hair.  Were this an In/Out post, she would be so far out! 

  • I love the color!

  • CQAussie

    “We hate your pinterest nails.”


  • guest2visits

    Oh yes; agree on all the hate.  This is one cheesy looking ensemble.

  • Scarlet39

    Maybe it’s just me, but there is something nauseating about that nail. Ugh.

  • oohsparkley!

    I thought she looked pretty.  I see nothing wrong with looking prom-ish as long as you look pretty. I know nothing.

    • Me neither…. (sad!)

  • fungstyle

    hahahah pinterest nails 🙂 god i so love/hate that site. but i unequivocally hate hate this dress. 

  • frannyprof

    I can’t tell the difference between this girl and Selena Gomez (aka the other girl).

    • I thought that’s who we were talking  about… I’m confused that they’re not the same person! 😉

  • unbornfawn

    As if the nails weren’t bad enough, the dress makes her butt look big. Nothing is working with this look. Poor dear.

  • I actually don’t think she looks that bad.  The nails are a horror show and belong back at the fake nail kiosk at whatever mall in NJ she got them from (and I say that with love, as a born and bred NJ mall rat myself), but everything else looks fine to me.  The dress is a great color for her.

  • I actually think she looks pretty and fresh!  I *did* go to prom in 1987, so that might explain it. Total flashback. I do hate the nails, though. 

  • poketom

    pinterest nails!!!!! LOL

  • ccm800

    She sure can do worse… as we all know. Its a good color on her though and decidedly regular for her. 

  • Allison Woods

    In the first picture, where she’s sticking her chin out, she looks like a goth Mariah Carey.

    The whole outfit is just horrid. I can’t think of anything I like about that dress.

  • Cathy S

    Everyone should have a Wonder Woman cuff.

  • Actually, I think the shoes are gorgeous, if one were just going to look at them.  Wearing them seems masochistic.  They don’t belong on feet, but they are pretty.  That dress in that color looks more like a costume than a real dress.  The cuff is ridiculous.  The nails are ridiculous.  Someone needs to stop pretending she is still senior in high school.

  • i actually love the hair; and i love the pinterest nails reference even more. 🙂