Time and time again, we find ourselves backed into a corner by a segment of our readers who wish that we would devote post space to explaining the mysteries of style to the average gal. “T Lo, what should I wear on my job interview?” “T Lo, what kinds of shoes go with this dress?” “T Lo, my daughter’s wedding is coming up and I want to look fuckable as hell because my ex-husband will be there.” “T Lo, what makes you so goddamn incredible?”
We rail against these emails; chewing on our restraints and screaming to the ceiling that there’s been a terrible mistake. Why? Well… because we can’t think of anything more obnoxious than two men telling all of womankind how they should dress. We’ve read a lot of style guides in our time as fashion bloggers. All of them – the ones written by men and the ones written by women – come down to one sentence: “This is how I, the author, think women should dress.”
No, kittens. Our forte is celebrity style and we like to roll around in that mudpit because it’s hard to hurt the feelings of people insulated from the rest of the world by a wall of stylists, personal assistants, publicists, agents, and managers. But most importantly, we like to comment on that world because celebrity style is sui generis. It follows a set of rules and considerations that absolutely no normal person ever has to think about, making it particularly ripe for teasing. If, while we are dropping our bitchy bon mots, some of our readers take away something that helps them with their own dressing, we are thrilled. But we consider it a byproduct of bitchery.
Having said all that, there are times when we can’t restrain ourselves and we wind up laying down the Law of the Land, style-wise. We urge all of our kittens to take everything we say with a grain of salt, but there comes a time when a bitchy blogger’s foot must be put down.
So here it is; T Lo’s Style Law of the Day. Get a pencil, boys. You might want to write this one down.
Shia LaBeouf grabs a cup of coffee on his way to a screening of ‘Lawless’ at the Paley Center for Media in New York City.
NECKBEARDS ARE NO.
Absolutely NOT, gentlemen. Absolutely not.
[Photo Credit: Felipe Ramales/PacificCoastNews.com]