Jordana Brewster in Zimmermann

Posted on August 06, 2012

When we first saw these pics, we were all, “Serving up early ’70s Ali MacGraw realness!” Then we looked a little closer and we were all, “EW! Girl, NO!”

This concludes the “Talking like Twinks” section of our day.

Jordana Brewster attends the Carmen Steffens U.S. west coast flagship store opening in Hollywood in a Zimmermann maxi dress accessorized with a Coach clutch.

Coach Legacy Metallic Universal Clutch

We really do like the dress, and it suits her to a T, but even we have to admit, that’s a little bedsheet-y crossed with a little “1974 Country Music Awards.” Looking a little closer, we don’t think the over-worked bodice marries all that well with the simple, floaty bottom. Also, that giant envelope clutch seems like a poor choice. It’s a sharp piece, but it doesn’t really work with the flower child vibe the dress is giving off. But what really set us off was the hair and makeup. Girl, that is a LOT of warpaint you’re sporting and this really isn’t the right dress for it. We’ve got nothing against a disco face, but you’re kind of required to pair it with a disco dress. And starlets, here’s a word of advice for free: when your hair queen gets a little too proud of his work and insists on pushing it all up front, where it hangs down like tentacles reaching for your breasts, put your foot down and tell him to knock it off.

 

[Photo Credit: Tibrina Hobson/Getty Images, coach.com]

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