Girl, That’s Not Your Dress: Kristen Bell

Posted on August 21, 2012

Everthing about this is so very wrong.

Kristen Bell makes an appearance on “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” in a Cushnie et Ochs dress paired with Casadei shoes.

Cushnie et Ochs Resort 2013 Collection/Model: Alyona Subbotina

Casadei ‘Blade’ Pump

Kristen’s been around the fame block for a decade now, so this really puzzles us. How can she not know that this dress is a terrible choice for a sit-down? Scratch that: it’s a HORRIBLE choice.

Honey, you’re showing belly rolls and underboob on national television. And yes, belly rolls are absolutely normal and there’s nothing wrong with them at all, nor are we implying that she’s anything but fit and thin. But still, girl. We can’t imagine that was the effect you were going for. We can’t imagine you did anything but cringe when you saw the footage. You look deathly uncomfortable (the patented arm-across-the-stomach pose; if there’d been a throwpillow on that chair, she’d have put it in her lap the second she sat down), so why on earth did you pick this dress? Or did you pick it without trying it on?

Then there’s the matchy-but-not-quite shoes which look totally bridesmaid.

We do think this is a pretty sharp dress, but it’s for standing and posing, not for sitting down. And that shape is just not the right shape for her. Great color, though.

Pack this one up and send it off to some teen starlet who only wants to pose on a step-and-repeat, dear.

 

[Photo Credit: NBC, style.com, casadei.com]

    • Sobaika

      GIRL. UNDERBOOB.

      • http://twitter.com/80nine CAMEЯON

        That 4th photo with her eyes… I just can’t

    • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

      And the neckline of this dress is crying out for your hair to be up. Plus, those matchy satin pumps almost take this to Bridesmaidtown.

      • mjude

        i think the pumps made it to bridesmaidtown.

        • http://twitter.com/ILikeShiny Cindi Williams

          And bought a nice little cape cod on .3 acres.

          • mjude

            ha!

      • http://twitter.com/PhDKnitter marlie

         Her hair doesn’t even have to be UP. Just *BACK*.

    • EverybodysStarling

      Hate the dress – MUST HAVE the shoes! 

    • Hell Yes, I Would!

      While the dress was no good, she redeemed herself when she put on Ryan Lochte’s medals and started making smart ass comments at him throughout his interview.

      • http://twitter.com/sebwfu Shannon Beamer

        I’m sad that I did not see this.  He is so beautiful, but such an asshat.  His personality and strange jewelry choices RUINED the beauty for me. 

        • lovelyivy

           He is my shameful celebrity crush for this reason. So icky and sleazy, but I so would.

    • Catiline

      I kept scrolling down and the horror washed over me afresh with every picture…

    • SewingSiren

      It doesn’t look that good standing up either.

      • Lori

        That net panel is just bad and there’s no way around it. Standing, sitting, lying down, walking, doing a handstand, there is no activity for which that works.

      • mshesterp

        And it makes her look short waisted.  She has super cute legs though, and i love the color on her (plus the shoes).  But you have to KNOW that’s a standing-only dress, right??

    • bookish

      Oh man. When I saw the first photo I thought, “Well…maybe it would look ok if she was standing up.” Then I saw the second photo and just shook my head.

    • theblondette

      This dress is hideous, and proof that many designers don’t think at ALL about how an item looks when it’s doing anything other than hanging on a model who is standing still.

      • Anathema_Device

        When I saw the picture of the model, I thought, “Oh, it is kind of cute.” then I realized that the minute she moved, she was in danger of flashing her boobs.

    • BuffaloBarbara

      The dress is okay standing up, and I could see saying, “oo, pretty,” before thinking about the function, but oh, dear God, sitting down…!  That should cure the desire to have sheer midriffs anywhere.  And come on, camera-folk… if you notice that her skirt is hiked up to the nether regions, couldn’t you switch to the close-up shot?  Develop a  hand signal that says, “Honey, you need to straighten your attire?  We’ll focus on Jay while you take care of it.”

    • pookiesmom

      Oh, HONEY. I love her so very much ever since watching her in Veronica Mars. Why why why would she do this to herself?

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clydette-Wantland/673315286 Clydette Wantland

      OMG!  Poor thing fell and bumped her head before getting dressed.

    • l_c_ann

      The dress’ color could have been chosen especially for sitting on that color couch.

    • Anathema_Device

      Oy, those pictures of her sitting! There is no way to sit in that dress and look good, no matter what you weigh. And you are so right about the shoes.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

      I just adore her, but I have no idea who’s horrible decision this was. They should be fired. 

    • http://twitter.com/MajorBedhead MajorBedhead

      Even when she’s standing up, she looks like she’s showing belly rolls. It’s probably just the chiffon, but still. I also think that dress is meant for someone nearly flat-chested. She looks like she’s about to fall out of the bottom of it. Yish.

      When the hell is this look going to go away? Chiffon makes people look like they have really weird skin conditions. It’s not flattering on anyone that I’ve seen in it. 

    • EmilyMullasWilson

      And then there’s the tragic, tragic HAIR.

    • crash1212

      It’s not a good dress if it makes a teeny weeny tiny person look belly-rolled. I think this is an awful dress, even on the model. And it’s especially awful in a sit-down situation. Kristen usually looks so cute…I’m going to pretend this never happened.

    • Judy_J

      This should serve as a warning to all who are planning to appear seated on camera….check your look not only standing, but also sitting to see how the outfit looks from EVERY angle. 

    • janetjb

      Yikes! That isn’t a dress for anyone to sit down in.

      She should keep the shoes, they are fabulous.

      • http://beautyforrealgirls.blogspot.com/ accidental housewife

         You could have stopped at “anyone”. It’s not often I vehemently despise a garment, but I hate it with a hot, flaming passion. It’s terrible.

        She’s so darn cute and funny, though, that I kind of don’t care what she wears.

    • HM3

      I like the color on her…is that anything?

    • http://houseofestrogen.typepad.com/ Ann

      I hope her stylist has been sent packing!

    • quiltrx

      Wrong for this venue, and just a really difficult dress, period.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_LI35AZLWSZEYRDZ4PUCBHUCZUI Jonathan

      I am just so over sheer panels and cut outs, I just don’t think it comes off as sexy and alluring I almost always wish they weren’t there. But I guess Cushnie et Ochs are kind of one way monkeys they are all cutouts and sheer panels 

    • Terri Smith

      I’d be happy to take those shoes off her hands for her.

    • http://twitter.com/Goldielox73 Goldie

      Any of you who haven’t seen her interview on Ellen where she talks about her love of sloths, need to go look it up on youtube.  It’s hilarious!

      Oh, and the dress is cute in theory, just not in practice. 

      • http://twitter.com/GuidosDaddy Jason M. Galloway

         I was just coming on to say this! I never thought much about her but fell in love with her when I watched that Ellen clip.

      • Isadora Paiva

        She’s absolutely hilarious, her interviews with Craig Ferguson are the best, he’s always saying she’s his favourite guest, and considering his also amazing interviews with Ewan McGregor (swoon) is sure saying something.

        • pookiesmom

          I really wish she’d get more (interesting) work. I love her but am always dismayed to find her starring in yet another mediocre-to-horrible romcom. I can understand that for some starlets, but she’s actually really talented!

          • http://eclectictsunami.blogspot.in/ Cassie

            Agreed! She was so, so great on Veronica Mars – please stop making terrible rom-coms, Kristen!

      • MilaXX

         I saw the Ellen ep where Dax Shepard surprised her for her birthday and she cried.

    • SapphoPoet

      Yikes. I like the color but that’s about it. I don’t think it works sitting OR standing. Overall, it’s a very odd look.

    • Golfkat

      Honestly, I feel like whenever there’s an outfit that TLo doesn’t like, the comments are just an echo of whatever remarks are made in the post. I mean if you agree with them then I guess it’s fine, but it’s like a lot of people just repeat what’s already been said.

      That being said, I think she looks a tad bit uncomfortable. I think it’s because of the way the dress is cut and fitted. The neckline looks a bit strangling and it looks like she’s very concerned with keeping the boob coverings and the waist in place. But apart from that I think she looks great. It’s more her reaction to the dress, not the dress itself that redacts from the look.

      • http://profile.yahoo.com/FUKKIIH5ZIACY4IOLLXOX6PR6U T

        It’s an Interwebs thang. People love to repeat other people’s thoughts as their own, even if the proof of their plagiarism is perched atop their post. The multiple(!) “witticisms” about matchy pumps and bridesmaids as though TLo hadn’t made a pronouncement about them both? Just bizarre. 

        • Golfkat

          Exactly. It’s like people can’t think for themselves. T&Lo: “I don’t like her silly-putty shoes” .. “silly-putty shoes” .. “silly-putty shoes”.. “silly-putty shoes”…..

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=608430075 Christopher Macsurak

      I’m sure a lot of heterosexual males who will never see this website or these comments will think she looks completely amazing.  It reminds me of that Will and Grace episode:  “Look, there are tons of guys out
      there. And eventually one is going to fall in love with you. Not because
      of who you are, but because of what you look like. A guy who sees you
      primarily as a pretty face and a hot body he wants to screw. You deserve
      that!”

    • Susan Crawford

      This whole look is just all kinds of wrong for all kinds of reasons. However, Jay seems to be enjoying the view, and considering the week he just had, I guess he deserves a glimpse of under-boobage and tummy.

    • miagain

      soooo great in theory….

    • http://twitter.com/dollsaga Dollsaga

      it is similar to a blue dress from Chloé Spring 2005 collection,  that dress was popular,  worn by Mischa Barton, Paris Hilton and other celebrities. even Barbie Doll got one ( on location “South Beach” Best Model Barbie)

    • miagain

      I bet her name becomes a noun in the world of celebrity styling… “no matter what you do… don’t Kristen Bell her”!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1241487378 Lauren Lynch Fox

      I really like the color on her. It is a really hard dress to sit in and hate the peek a boo boob.

    • holzfaellen

      I love Kristen Bell so much (ever seen her on Craig Ferguson? she’s really funny!), but I’m always sad to see photos of her in any sort of public appearance, her fashion choices only range from “boring” to “waaaah?”…

      • MilaXX

         She was great when they went to Paris last year.

    • Artis Diggins

      ‘And yes, belly rolls are absolutely normal and there’s nothing wrong with them at all, nor are we implying that she’s anything but fit and thin.’

      It’s really cute that you caveat statements for ‘fear’ of the internet trolls- loves it.

    • schadenfreudelicious

      the only thing that could have saved that dress is if she had brought a baby sloth along as an accessory…..

    • kschwarting

      I was in the same room with her for about five minutes not terribly long ago, and she is teeny-tiny.  If that dress can do that to her figure, it should be taken out back and burned.  There’s no hope for a mere mortal wearing it.

    • Bozhi

      Ouch.  Cute shoes though.

    • Funkykatt

      I think it’s an ugly dress on anyone

    • http://twitter.com/sebwfu Shannon Beamer

      This is not anybody’s dress.  I like her so much and she deserves better than this nonsense. 

    • BazoDee

      Her hair and make-up are flawless -she actually rocks the nude lip better than most, the color is fantastic -but WOW -what a horrible horrible choice. 

    • VRuss

      Underboob and belly rolls…. *shudders* That dress is better suited for a stick thin, with no boobs person, like the model in the second photo.

    • Julie Fountain

      All that fabric at the top combined with all that hair is seriously unflattering. This dress is for someone taller with short hair or an up ‘do.

    • kimmeister

      Erm, well she looks like she was a fun guest.

    • guest2visits

      I thought she was a little obnoxious. The dress was awful too. And as insufferably shallow and arrogant as he seems to be;
      isn’t it a huge breach of manners to put on someone’s Olympic medals, or any medals ? I’m almost certain if he hadn’t taken them
      off; she would have asked for them anyway.

    • http://www.facebook.com/izzzyy Dixie Murphy Ross

      BOOB CHUB.

    • BrooklynBomber

      Oh, Jesus. That dress should never have been made. It’s an insult to women (as opposed to manequins and Barbies, for whom it might be lovely).

    • http://twitter.com/#!/Space_Kitty Space Kitty

      I was gonna say it’s not a sit-down dress, but judging by the photo of her entrance?  It’s not a stand-up dress either. Mesh panels are no one’s friend.

    • CatherineRhodes

      What is going on with her underboob? Is she taped or is she wearing a sports bra? It just looks freakin’ odd.

    • MilaXX

      Total bridesmaid  complete with dyed to match shoes. The fit when sitting only compounds the error, not only due to the under boob issues, but the crisscross neckline makes her look like she has no neck.

    • http://profiles.google.com/gillianholroyd gillian holroyd

      The War on Mesh claims another victim!

    • Vickiefantastico

      That is officially the most unflattering dress I have ever seen on a star. I honestly feel sorry for her.

      And sorry, I don’t think it would look good on anyone. It needs to be burned and destroyed forever.

    • Pants_are_a_must

      She’s been looking really, really off lately. All her outfits have been horrible.

    • TieDye64

      Wow, that is hiddy. Girl is cute, but she rarely gets it right. This is soooo wrong, from the rolls to the underboob to satin bridesmaid shoes. 

    • UsedtobeEP

      Even standing up, even on the model, this is the worst dress I think I have ever seen. Wow.

    • cleep1000

      She really needs help.

    • Thathoodwink

      I’m so confused…is that sheer fabric with nothing under it, or is she wearing some sort of a bra? I see a seam running where the bottom of the bra would be…what is this mess??

    • http://vhanna26.typepad.com Vera

      The stylist who chose this dress for a sit down interview should be banished.