Pairs Division: Kristin Kreuk and Jay Ryan

Posted on July 31, 2012

More new people, darlings! To this blog, anyway. Let’s initiate them into the World of T Lo by judging them!


Kristin Kreuk and Jay Ryan attend 2012 TCA Summer Tour – CBS, Showtime and The CW Party. Kristin wore a white Midi dress paired with ALDO ‘Hayth’ pumps.

Okay, we had to look him up because we had no idea who he was. Turns out these two are going to be in the new Beauty and the Beast series; a re-do of the popular series of the ’80s/’90s with Ron Perlman and Linda Hamilton. And yes, that pretty boy up there has been cast as Vincent, aka, The Beast. Hilarious. How very CW. “He’s a beast – but totally HOT!!!”


SHE: Is an almost-but-not-quite. Everything from the waist up looks very pretty. Then it all hits the crotch. What looks, in closeups, like a chic, white, summer-fabulous dress turns into a knotted sheet once you pull the camera out. Seriously, who wants all the material in her dress to point right at her crotch and then top it off with a big ol’ crotchknot, to coin a fashion term that no one but us will use? Also, the shoes are as boring as shoes get and she could have seriously used some punctuation jewelry here.  Score: 5/10. To be honest, we think we’re being kind because that’s not even half of a good outfit.

HE: Coincidentally, also looks fine from the waist up. Did their handlers tell them that all pictures would be closeups or something? Did they think they’d be seated behind a desk on the red carpet? The jacket’s very nice and appears to fit him well. We wish he’d gone for some contrast in the tie, though. Boys, your tie is always your main opportunity to provide some color and contrast to your outfit. Don’t take the safe route with your tie. It’s the boy-equivalent of the silly putty pump. The pants are tragic and we will say no more about them. Score: 5/10.

Combined Score: 5/10. Tsk. That’s what you get when you only wear half of a decent outfit (at most), kids.


[Photo Credit: Andrew Evans/PR Photos]

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  • Judy_J

    They’re both as boring as snot. 

    • They’re boring because they’re so generic. Central casting, please send us a pretty boy and girl, mid twenties, nice smile, inoffensive, you know, like the last ones and the ones before them.

  • Sobaika

    A Beauty & The Beast remake? I know Hollywood has run out of ideas, but really?

  • call_me_schmeg

    crotchknot. hmmmm….
    “don’t get your panties in a crotchknot.”
    yes, that will do.

  • VeryClaire

    I wish you guys would go back to covering people I’ve heard of. It’s getting leaner and leaner lately.

  • MilaXX

    Being kind to the newbies I see.
    She does indeed have that crotch knot issue and boring shoes so her score is far. He on the other hand is wearing the most tragic ants/shoes combo I have seen in a very log time. He gets no more than a 3/10 for that.

    As for the show. I have to confess, I may have an even harder time with this reboot than I did with BattleStar Galatica. With BG it was just a matter of separating the new version from the cheesy 70’s show. Beauty and the Beast was different. I FLOVED that show like no other. I positively swooned over Vincent’s crappy poetry. Probably cried that their love could never be. Even if I could buy Kristin as a replacement for Linda Hamilton, this dude will never compare to Ron Perlman’s Beast. Now I’m not saying old Ron is a looker, but he physical size and features lent themselves to the Beast a lot more than this bland pretty boy. Also Ron had that deep, gravely voice. I look at this guy and I really have my doubts.

    • Wendi126

      Ooh me too…I never missed it. The Beast was hot. He’s one of the leads on Sons of Anarchy which I like but whenever he’s on screen all I see is the Beast

      • MilaXX

        I know. I missed the boat on that show. When it premiered I watched the the pilot, but it didn’t grab me right away and I had scheduling conflicts with the shows I was watching so I never gave it another chance. I have seen him in Hellboy though and I quite like that.

  • PinkLemon

    i saw them, realized i had no clue who they were, then thankfully you addressed that!…..then i realized i DO know who she is, at least i think, she was on smalleville? maybe? either way, i liked the concept of that dress, but the crotch-knot! the arbitrary ribbon! the cheapey fabric! the ALDO SHOES??? FORREAL, GIRL?

    • j_anson

      Yup, she was one of Superman’s alliterative love interests. Lana L-something, I think? I always wonder how the DC boys refrained from going whole hog and making him Klark Kent.

      • TropiCarla

        Lana Lang! I did love her in Smallville for a few seasons. I couldn’t hang for the duration of its marathon run though. Tom Welling was fine and all, but damn that shit was dragging on forever. Sheesh!

    • carolie_king

      Smallville and Lana made me walk around the house for weeks saying things like, “Clark? Would you like a soda, Clark? Clark, I think I’ll have one too, Clark. Clark Clarkity Clark Clark,” while opening my eyes as wide as possible and blinking a lot. So. Annoying. (Her, not me.) 🙂

  • joe_tey83

    If Beast looking like that is some kind of curse, somebody should just curse me already. And I won’t even bother trying to break that curse in any way whatsoever.

    • JosephLamour

      I know, right? Also. His feet are huge! I mean this in no sexual way whatsoever.

  • You are being extraordinarily kind today.  Must have to do with that….uh…..break you took earlier.  I hope Kristen & Jay know that they will not get that kind of indulgence from you every time.

  • kingderella

    he looks indeed very fine from the waist up. and for once, im not talking about the manmeat. i love that jacket-tie-shirt combo. love the materials, textures, and shades of grey. everything fits. nice!
    i dont mind the pants that much but i can see your point. still would have given hima higher grade.

  • It looks like her private parts are taking a deep breath…

  • hughman

    You should have seen what Lumiére was wearing. He doesn’t hold a candle to these two. 

  • j_anson

    Those pants, my GOD.

  • I only know her from some ads a few years ago, where she was a fresh-faced youngster making sure her skin stayed clean and clear with Noxzema.  Seemed like she was only a teenager then, but apparently not because now she’s clearly well into middle age.  Honestly — that dress is aging in the worst way.  (Though I will give it points for being a better bed-sheet dress than anything I was ever able to make.)

  • guest2visits

    They’re both cute. Like his jacket. She’s wearing a plain white bed sheet, and I hate it.

  • Terri Smith

    Did we just discover the long-lost sister of the Scrolldown Fug? The Pan Out Fug.

  • And can we talk about that pocket square? Or maybe it’s an unread note from his stylist: I told you to have those pants hemmed and let out, DAMN YOU!”

  • Billie_Dawn

     You should all see the promotional photos for this show. How exactly did they make this guy into the Beast? They gave him a scar on his face. Like a faint scratch that runs along the upper part of his cheekbone.

    It’s hilariously stupid, even for the CW. It reminds me of the movie version of the Phantom of the Opera musical where the Phantom’s hideous disfigurement was basically a bad sunburn.

  • Call me Bee

    Man that dress is ugly.  It was ugly when it showed up in the 80s and it’s ugly now.  She does look cute from the neck up, though.  He’s fine.  Neither is anything special…

  • Bozhi

    That is one ugly dress.  He looks like an insurance adjuster, nothing against insurance adjusters, but they don’t dress for the red carpet.

  • quiltrx

    Why redo something that was great the way it was?  If you can’t improve upon something, or bring something new to it, leave it alone.

    These two look horribly bland, and like their ability to act their way out of paper bags is doubtful.  Also like they can’t afford stylists.

  • unbornfawn

    I can see Michael Kors stealing the term crotchknot from you guys.

  • THOSE PANTS! So, so bad!

  • Super boring. Ditto for the show.

  • Cathy S

    I hate that dress but I love that jacket. Ron Perlman has character. This guy is bland.

  • ballerinawithagun

    Crotch Knot, NOT!

  • Dot

    Zzzz. Also, every time I see a lady star standing in that cross-legged style, I can’t help but think they need a bathroom break.

  • MissAnnieRN

    Where have we seen that dress before?  I feel like some other starlet has recently worn it.  Anyway, it is ugly, and Toga-esque.

    And that is some BLUE STEEL, man-star who I’ve never heard of.

    • littlemac8

      I agree; I remember a similar look:   Some dress that drags your eyes down to their crotch and then settle around the thighs!  NOOOO!

  • Dan_In_NYC

    They are totally MEH, I agree.  But more importantly, do I need to buy a tie bar?

    • Yes you do. But just try to find one.

      • Dan_In_NYC

        Ugh, I think I now have a project for Friday.  I have been wearing a lot of ties to work of late, and would like a way to bump it up a notch.  I have a feeling this may involve 2nd hand shops.

  • JennaMarieS

    *sigh* if only the crotchknot had been raised 3 or 4 inches.

    • kimmeister

      Yes, a navelknot would have been infinitely better.

  • Jay’s pants are tragic…and STOP PLAYING POCKET POOL. His clothes just look so off the rack at Macy’s. Maybe the production company should front them some cash…or access to the wardrobe department. I have some great ties he can borrow to brighten the outfit.

    Now Kristen looks like she was influenced by the upcoming remake of The Great Gastby. All she needs is on of those “Thoroughly Modern Millie” skull caps. Voo Doo Dee Doo Doo!

    Advance word is the B and B remake is el floppo. By the way, Jay looks like he could be the brother of James Ross is the remake of Dallas.

  • janetjb

    I think you are being generous to these newbies.

  • Scored way too high on that one… Beauty and the Beast? really? maybe the chemistry will grow? That dress is very ‘I am going to wash the laundry down by a rock at the river’… it looks comfy is the nicest thing you can say…yawn.

  • Jennifer Hofstetter

    I liked her better with dark hair.

  • littlemac8

    I see too much aging make up on her and then that tragic dress!  What is that little ribbony tab at the crotch knot?  That looks a bad PR detail when the contestant has run out of time and says, what the hell!

  • jw_ny

    gosh, he’s cute.  I’d gladly help him get the wrinkles out of his pants…

  • Warmheartedgirl Seattle

    She:  I truly dislike the cross legged stance.  The dress is hiddy.
    He:  Get your hands out of your pockets, kid!

    Not going to be watching a remake with these two in it!

  • RzYoung

    Crotchknot -snarf ;D