Girl, That’s Not Your Dress: Blake Lively

Posted on June 27, 2012

You can’t just slap the Duchess of Cambridge’s dress on any random blonde starlet and expect it to work. This is today’s Fashion Lesson.

 

Blake Lively makes an appearance on the ‘Late Show With David Letterman’ in New York City to promote her new movie “Savages” in a Jenny Packham silk chiffon cocktail dress with a crystal encrusted neckline paired with Christian Louboutin pumps.

Jenny Packham Fall 2012 Collection

Christian Louboutin ‘Pigalle Strass’ Pump, $3,395

See?

Looks great on the model and almost certainly would look great on Cathy Cambridge. Does NOT look great on Blake Lively. And, we imagine, it doesn’t look great on any gal who has a decent-sized set of boobs on her. That kind of fussy collar and neckline just isn’t going to work on a buxom lady. And besides, the color does nothing for her.

Not a horribly offensive look or anything; it just doesn’t suit her. Blake, we’d tell you to pack this up and send it to Cathy Cambridge, but

  1. She probably already has it, and
  2. She wouldn’t deign to touch something that has touched an American movie actress’ breasts.

 

Best to just get rid of it, dear.

 

[Photo Credit: Hall/Pena, PacificCoastNews.com, elle.com, christianlouboutin.com]

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  • Lina_bee

    Way to make a great dress look cheap and tacky. “No, I don’t have a stylist!” FAIL.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2P2ANLRZ6YAVGONA36I2AQJYGI VicD

      Could she just GO AWAY now, please?

  • halleygee

    Always nice to see things that look better on small breasted women, said the small breasted woman.

    • shopgirl716

      I am a very large breasted woman and I would give them to you if I could.

      • Violina23

        Me too!

      • halleygee

        Thanks :) I would just be happy to have my pre-pregnancies size C’s back.

      • MoHub

         Moi aussi.

        Take my D-cups—please!

        • http://www.filmsbyneptune.com/ Dani Colman

           We should organise a boob pool.  Those with excess boobage can donate to the pool, so that us ironing boards can borrow if we need to fill out a slutty dress to go clubbing.  We’ll wash and dry them before we return!

          • halleygee

            Loving all of these responses, and this is a great idea…

          • TheOriginalLulu

            Works for me, as long as those of us with the slutty boobs can take them down a little when we want to throw on a tank top on a hot summer day.

          • MidArmJewel

            Can we have a butt pool too?  I would be glad to donate!

          • MilaXX

             Yes cause if my DD’s could go down to C’s I’d be quite content. Enough to fill out a blouse, but not enough to require the heavy hardware all the damn time.

          • shopgirl716

            As a 32G, yes you read that correctly, I think I have plenty to get several of you up to C.  And I would willing donate to a butt and thigh pool as well.

          • fitzg

            shopgirl!! my size twin!!  i thought i was the only one in existence.

          • theblondette

            Oh honey, you need to come to the UK where we have all the big busted ladies! I am bigger than you both – and we have bras to fit us!

          • http://profile.yahoo.com/Y3OY6COEVBS2STNCUNIRZ3COUE Claudia

            38H and its all about Bravissimo, ladies!  Would also be willing to donate to the butt pool, but hubs is now crying in the corner – fetal position.  Maybe just up top, then.  

          • kimmeister

            I just wish I could redistribute the fat I already have.  Take it all of my legs and stick it into my boobs. I’d also redistribute my height – take 2-3″ of torso out and make my legs 2-3″ longer.  Then I might be able to wear an off-the-rack sheath dress for once in my life!

          • http://www.filmsbyneptune.com/ Dani Colman

             Story of my life :/

          • YoungSally

            My sister will donate as will I….so far we’ve only pledged to our other sister who has unfortunate post-mommy long boobs….in size AAAAAA.

          • Aurumgirl

             You don’t understand:  I do not want mine returned.

          • http://www.filmsbyneptune.com/ Dani Colman

            That’s okay: tattoo “DNR” on the nipples and they’ll just stay in the pool.  Having a few orphaned pairs will help ensure there’s always enough boobage to go around.

    • Sara__B

      What are you talking about? asks the large breasted woman. Almost everything looks better on the small breasted woman!

    • amf0001

      lots of things look better – anything backless is impossible for me and I always find backless things so sexy…

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_UCLO5V2YD36T7QMPKOC7YXPOFU Erica

      There’s a LOT of stuff out there that looks good on the small breasted and terrible on us gals who wear minimizer bras on a regular basis.  I think it’s why folks like Selma Hayek so often look off in their outfits.  My husband might love these things in an almost unseemly manner, but dresses and blouses by and large do not.  Take Blake here.  A real knockout, but I think her boobs are making that dress look a little trashy….

      • LesYeuxHiboux

         Haha, my husband also takes his admiration of my excess boobage to a nearly unseemly place. Any time I thrown on his old camos from the Marine Corps and a black tank top to do around-the-house stuff he tells me I look amazing. It’s just the cleavage.

    • TheOriginalLulu

      There are MANY, MANY things that look better on small-breasted women: Tank tops, strapless dresses, spaghetti strap dresses, blazers (especially double-breasted), high-waisted pants, bolero jackets, raglan-sleeve tees…I could go on and on.

      • Sobaika

        Truth. BUT this is probably one of those grass-is-always-greener things. Anyone is welcome to my funbags, I’d be glad to get rid of them.

        Actually, I’d probably be super happy wearing all the clothes that were one verboten, then get naked and begin to cry and feel uncomfortable and miss them dearly.

        All bodies (and boobies) are beautiful.

        • TheOriginalLulu

          I love my boobs and it’s not that I’m complaining. It’s just that having a large chest does make dressing a lot more challenging.
          Agreed that all bodies are beautiful. :)

        • TheDivineMissAnn

           I am okay with my boobie size, I just want them to go back up to the top of my ribcage, not hang at the bottom :()

      • halleygee

        OK, maybe true… but not the strapless dresses – you need some boobs for that.

        • TheOriginalLulu

          Some boobage, but not a lot. Anything bigger than a C and you look horrible in anything strapless. 
          If you don’t believe me, google pictures of Christina Hendricks in a strapless dress.

          • http://phantomminuet.blogspot.com/ MinAgain

            That’s what kills me about those ubiquitous strapless bridal gowns.  Women with big boobs look dreadful in them, like their cleavage is going to spill out at any moment during the ceremony.

          • TheOriginalLulu

            Dreadful is an understatement. It confuses me that these women continue to wear them.

            Who hasn’t been to a wedding where the bride spent all her time on the dance floor hiking up her dress lest she flash everyone on her own wedding day? Not to mention that the cherished wedding day album will forever show her yanking up her dress in every other photo.

          • Kathleen Gillies

             that and the upper arms are usually not strapless worthy. 

          • Flooby

            I liked all of this because it’s COMPLETELY TRUE.  Alas, when I was shopping for my wedding dress (not that long ago) the stores ONLY carried strapless.  I began to think it was a conspiracy- because I insisted on adding straps and they insisted on charging me extra for the extra fabric.  

        • Aurumgirl

           Any dress that’s built for a bustline to hold up is not a dress one should wear.  The bust is not designed to cantilever fabric.  FFS, as the British say.

    • Aurumgirl

       Everything looks better on a small breasted woman, says the generously breasted woman. 

      This dress is way too racy for Cathy.  I think she’d wear it if she altered it so that the front was a simple drape (not a v-neck, just closed to the collar bone) and basically just sewn as a long sleeved blouse that you could button along the back.

      • Snarky_Amber

        I agree. I don’t think Cathy would ever wear a neckline that plunging now that she’s a Duchess. Liz would DIE.

    • http://twitter.com/pointlesswords jaymeglynn

      What doesn’t look good on small-breasted women though? I have boobs but it’s so hard to them off without looking tacky.

  • lordandtaylor

    Ah hem, Blake dear, your dress is falling open. Modesty please.
    Nice shoes.

    • blogless

      Really, if she didn’t have a smile on her face in that first photo I’d have thought she was mugged.

  • Sobaika

    I don’t think her mounds of hair are helping the situation. A neckline like that calls for a soft/messy bun.

  • shopgirl716

    Fabulous shoes.  

    • CozyCat

      I’m still in shock that they cost $3,400!!!!  (that’s more than I paid for my CAR!!!)

      • alicetiara

        Agreed on the price tag, but apparently she gets Louboutin’s entire collection for free every season (?!). And they look fab with the dress. 

  • mozzer0906

    Where the dress she had on the other day was made just for her it seems, this one is made for someone who doesn’t have as big of boozooms.  On Blake it just looks ill fitted and trashy.

    • amywinns

      In a nutshell.

  • http://twitter.com/msjwatt J.Watt

    She’s just trying to give everyone a preview of what’s to come in that movie where she sleeps with two men. SUCH a departure from her role on Gossip Girl.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/XAFAJ53QF3DLEFQB3WTLMRM75E MarinaB

    The FugGirls will be please to see Boobs Legsly is back in top form.

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/XAFAJ53QF3DLEFQB3WTLMRM75E MarinaB

      *pleased

  • kittenwithaquip

    Blake Lively shares the Lohan knack for aging in dog years. I’m 42 and I bet I get carded more than she does. Well, if starlets actually got carded. Seeing as la Lohan has been getting trashed at the Chateau Marmont since she was 17, I’m guessing getting carded isn’t a concern, but still.

  • TheOriginalLulu

    Definitely a dress for a girl with a lot less curves than Miss Boobs Legsley here. I don’t care how many times I hear stylists and DVF repeat it, the wrap dress IS NOT “universally flattering”.

    • SFCaramia

      That was just a line invented to sell DVF dresses..take a word from this “full-figured gal” (thanks, Jane Russell for that wonderful euphemism), they are NOT.

      • TheOriginalLulu

        Jane Russell!! *love*
        Full-figured and GAWGEOUS!

      • shopgirl716

        Full figured and short waisted here.  The wrap dress will gap open in odd places and safety pins don’t cut it.  Jane Russell is a goddess.

  • Araina23

    I like it.  She looks fine.  And who cares what some Brit thinks of a hardworking American actress?  

  • understateddiva

    At least she didn’t wear the runway shoes.  From orthopedic to fabulous!

  • DinaSews

    What’s the female word for ‘douche’? Cause that’s all I think of when I look at her.

  • VioletFem

    Her dress is trying to strangle her.

  • Little_Olive

    I don’t think Cathy would go for the collar, even if the S&M reference is ever so slight. But it’s pretty!

  • crash1212

    Way to boobular to carry this dress off. LOVE those shoes though….slow clap for the Loubs.

  • altalinda

    Dave must have been pretty distracted in her interview.

  • PhillipWilde

    It’s a beautiful dress, but the neckline might be a bit too plunging for Cathy Cambridge.

    • TheOriginalLulu

      It wouldn’t look like that on the Duchess. Look at how much more modest the same dress looks on the small-breasted model.

  • http://twitter.com/katshimmers Kat Wright

    Imagine what this is going to look like when she sits down to be interviewed!!!

  • http://korilian.livejournal.com/ korilian

    You know what this blog has taught me. That ridiculously overpriced, high fashion garments are apparently not actually meant to be worn by anyone. 

    • Kathleen Gillies

       Yes, and they pay celebrities to wear them anyway– So we will buy more bags.

      • lovelyivy

         And shoes. And perfume!

  • Judy_J

    Tacky with a capital “T”.  Love the shoes, though.

  • tereliz

    *shudder* This dress looked so high-class and chic on the model. It seems like it’s more than just the open bust that’s making it look “legit trashy”; the waist seems like it’s hitting in the wrong place and she really ought to have employed some tape.

  • MilaXX

    So true. On Cathy worn with her go to putty pumps and matching bag we’d be commending her for having some interest at the collar. On Blake it looks Vega hooker.

    • AudreysMom

       There it is. I knew someone would provide the comment that I could simply ‘like’ and not have to write. Thank you MilaXX.

  • PeggyOC

    I don’t think it’s the breasted-ness.  I think she’s deliberately opened that.  Yes, it will sit a little differently on a woman with boobs, but there are enough gathers in that fabric that you can, er, nestle things differently.  I’m pretty sure Blake chose this particular positioning of the folds of fabric deliberately, because that’s who she is.

    • GillianHolroyd

      ITA. It’s as if she yanked the two sides apart before stepping out of the limo. This would fit fine if she hadn’t deliberately gone for the exposure.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_HREPOWNBVUBRIVPQCF3ST2IKDM Euphory

      Exactly.  Remember how she used to hold open long dresses up to her thighs for photographs?  T&Lo featured a few of these.  Never got her fashion icon status.  

  • http://asskickingadviser.com/ Ass Kicking Adviser

    Wow, the BLive can really tacky something up when she wants too eh? I think the burned out tresses are helping the white-trash factor.

  • http://phantomminuet.blogspot.com/ MinAgain

    And I hate her hair.

  • http://twitter.com/iraki86 IraKi

    I think this would look great on Tilda for some reason. It’s not really her style, I know but I think it would suit her for some reason. Maybe because Tilda has amazing bone structure and this dress punctuates the wearer’s face.

  • http://www.facebook.com/AdriannaGrezak Adrianna Grężak

    I can’t believe she has four months’ worth of rent on her feet

  • Saucysusan

    This looks too deliberate as in “here are my boobs everyone”. And wrap dresses CAN do wonders for the amply endowed if they fit right. The shoes! Drool. Not that I could a) afford them b) wear them. Oh well.

  • Kyle Crawford

    I want to see our Miss Cathy in ALL those McQueen pants suits from yesterday!

  • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

    Fix your damn hair.

  • jennifervney

    Huh. On the model: Dynasty. On Blake: High class escort. 

    • thecitysleeps

       THIS

  • LesYeuxHiboux

    Gorgeous dress not meant for anyone with a pair of knockers, like most of the fashion world’s offerings. So pretty Blake, I almost don’t blame you for trying. 

  • ChelseaNH

    I do like the choice of shoes, though.

  • unbornfawn

    Yes, that big gap at the cleavage is ruining the line of the dress. 

  • cleep1000

    If you’re going to wear something with that detailed of a neckline, you don’t cover half of it with your hair. Also, she should have had the plunging v-neck sown up some. Way too revealing and really all anyone can look at.

  • judybrowni

    titscrepancy

  • H3ff

    No matter what she wears she always just looks so sloppy

    She is the polar opposite of someone like Keira Knightley. Say of her what you will, but she is elegant as hell.

    • Kathleen Gillies

       to be fair, Keira does not have the boobage Blake carries.

  • momogus

    The shoes are KILLAH!

  • Warrior89

    Haha…oh my…I like it.  *ducking for cover*

  • 3boysful

    A few well-placed tacking stitches–and a hairbrush– might have saved the day.

  • marilyn

    In spite of the big boobage, the top of the dress is way too big.  It does not hug her body, but falls open.  You are right.  This dress is not for the busty gals out there.  However, LOVE the shoes.

  • granddelusion

    Interesting on the model. Awful on the bimbo.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F73LIJ3SJGI5AJQMXMWXCKILHI Pamela

    I like the shoes but good god, Lemon!  $3400?  I can’t with shoes costing that much.  I don’t care if they were individually handcrafted by Jesus.

  • jw_ny

    she just had to go and tramp up a fairly sophisticated and pretty dress, didn’t she…typical.

  • guest2visits

    She’s pretty, but she’s wearing that dress like it was a messy bathrobe.  It’s not a neckline that I particularly like, but the model is
    wearing it well.  Love the black shoes with this as much as Blake’s.

  • asmith

    This looks great.  The skirt could be a little longer to balance out the overhang above.

  • asmith

    Why are we wish-casting personality disorders onto Cathy O’Cambridge?  And then wondering why celebrity screws up perfectly nice people?  Just say something knowledgeable about the clothes, if possible, and move on to the next.

  • Lilak

    One thing I’ll give her: Interesting how she combines All-American Girl and “bimbo” so thoroughly.  Um, I guess that qualifies as some sort of talent?

  • quiltrx

    I think you meant to say it had touched the boobs of an American “actress.”

  • http://frankbettecenter.org/ sleah_in_norcal

    her hair has the look of cheap dye and too many hours in the pool.  it’s like several shades of bright yellow-orange straw.

  • Jecca2244

    one of the main points of a stylist is to narrow down the selection because you have no time. she clearly needs someone to narrow down the selection, and not just a harried assistant.

  • http://kittysdrawings.com Esz

    How can something so demure and chic on the model, look so trashy on Blake!? It really is those boobs ;-) Cover ‘em up lady!

  • RzYoung

    God, it’s like a totally different dress on the model, it looks so classy and retro. Then Blake makes it look all cheap and gross, if I were Jenny Packham i’d be gutted

  • Maddie Meyers

    That went from prim and elegant to slutty and flashy pretty fast.

  • jessicasac

    Agreed. As a petite but buxom young lady, certain styles do not flatter us.

  • librarygrrl64

    Classy on the model, trashy on Blake. No surprises.

  • Candigirl1968

    Ah, that’s the Blake I know and can’t stand.

    • MilaXX

       Oh my dog!, they are airing this episode tonight. When she walked out I thought we were going to see a nip slip or wardrobe malfunction. This is not a dress for any gal over a B cup.

  • http://robot-heart.tumblr.com heartbot

    Her problem seems to be that she’s so often all boobs and ratty hair. She needs someone who can show her how to dress her figure and, hopefully, do some deep conditioning treatments.

  • cheekachu

    She looks WAY better in this than the model. I’m not usually on board with her style, but this is pretty great to me.