Michael Fassbender for Esquire UK

Posted on May 01, 2012

Once again providing you with your RDA of Fassie.

Michael Fassbender featured in the June 2012 issue of Esquire UK magazine photographed by Alice Hawkins and styled by Gareth Scourfield.

Boring clothes and setting, but you can’t hide that personality.

Anyway, we finally saw Shame the other night and really loved it. His penis is everything they said it was, but the movie was surprisingly tender and sad without being maudlin or overwhelmingly depressing. No, really. We know a lot of people characterized it as dark and wrist-slittingly awful, but that’s not how we came away from it, for whatever reasons. It felt like a very real look at a very real couple of lives over a brief period of time, which made it all the more affecting.

But Carey Mulligan was a tiny bit miscast, we think.

[Photo Credit: Alice Hawkins for esquire.co.uk]

    • MilaXX

      Says a lot about an editorial when I’m more interested in the shower tiles than the model or the clothes.

      • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

        I must admit, that IS some great looking tile.

        • MilaXX

           And I like Fassie, but this is dull. Besides I’m in the midst of home reno & nearly crying at the prices of what I like versus what I can afford.

          • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

             You have my understanding and my sympathies.  I work in the hardware world, so I hear comments like yours all day long.  A house is a large box, with no bottom, into which one dumps one’s money, endlessly.

            • formerlyAnon

               Once, just ONCE before I die, I want to live somewhere that I can afford to keep up properly.

              That is all.

            • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

               Sounds like its time to: A: win a lottery  B: engage in SERIOUS larceny. C: off a wealthy relative, or D: find a sugar daddy or mama.

            • P M

               DOUBLE LOYALTY!!

            • formerlyAnon

              I guess it’ll have to be the lottery – not  clever enough for larceny, no wealthy relatives, and not nearly enough patience to play a sugar daddy.

              A really big prize, too – you know how “simple upkeep” tends to creep! Today I just want a new tub and some exterior paint – tomorrow it’ll be professional landscaping and a screened porch with electricity – which would entail moving or raising the roofline. 

              [makes note to buy ticket]

            • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

               Lottery it is!

            • P M

               Nah. Too chancy. I say off the relative – more useful dead than alive anyway 😛

            • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

              Only worth if they’re filthy rich

            • P M

               Oh, darlin’, you just earned my loyalty :). What part of the hardware world do you live in? I used to love Home Depot, but then I started working for them. Now I don’t (YAY!). I’m team Lowe’s and Lee Valley Hardware all the way.

            • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

               Thanks!!!  I work for a big old family owned Hardware/Variety store in SF, called Cliff’s Variety.  We’ve been around for over 75 years.  Its a great place, and great people.

            • P M

                I’ll remember to visit on my Grand Tour of SF :). If you want, you can
              join me on the tour of South Indian restaurants and Other Kitschery 😀

            • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

               Sounds great!  I love playing tour guide in Babylon By the Bay.

            • P M

               BBtB? What’s that? :)

            • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

              It’s another way we like to think of San Francisco.

            • P M

               I’ll remember to visit on my Grand Tour of SF :). If you want, you can join me on the tour of South Indian restaurants and Other Kitschery 😀

          • lordandtaylor

            I am in the same boat….everything is either Home depot cheap or remodeling store super expensive. Still I love the tile…now to go out and find it. There goes my weekend, again.

        • P M

           Looks like some VERY expensive marble. Wonder where the locale was?

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=746098172 Leigh Anne Statton

        Those are some seriously fab tiles though, to be fair.

      • http://phantomminuet.blogspot.com/ MinAgain

        A shower tile of beauty is a joy forever.

      • ccm800

         Can’t add to that. Well said.

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=630168379 Brian G. Cox

         Tiles are great, but I actually noticed the shower head first.

    • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

      All he need do is smile at me like that, just once, and oh, boy oh boy are we ON.

      • Warmheartedgirl Seattle

        Yep.  Great smile and incredible eyes!  And I like the tile, too.  :)

        • http://twitter.com/foodycatAlicia foodycatAlicia

          It’s the eyes that get me. Beautiful, beautiful eyes.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1045295912 Charles Purdy

      He clearly needs some instruction on how to use a shower; I hereby volunteer my services. 

      • Jill_3

         If you find the task too demanding, I will be more than happy to step in.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1045295912 Charles Purdy

       Those tiles *are* nice, though. :)

    • Sobaika Mirza

      The things I would do to this man…

    • kittenwithaquip

      He’s a very charismatic and sexy man, but why does his head look as though it was Photoshopped onto a wee little body? Is it the angle of the photographs? Is it just me?

      • http://twitter.com/jennsaysmeow Fifi LaRoux

         He just has a wee little body. His waist is the size of my thigh.

      • http://twitter.com/andakat andakat

        He’s built/toned, but is ridiculously small-boned.  I know some people who have met him who say he looks like a gust of wind would blow him over.

        • JosephLamour

          Uh oh, looks like Adam Levine has competition for the “Tiniest Hunk” award he’s been holding for all these years.

        • formerlyAnon

           *sigh* In other words, a near perfect bone structure.

    • Sara__B

      I appreciate the smiles. They’re become rare in fashion editorials.

      • kimmeister

        Hear, hear!

    • http://twitter.com/Unityo30 Unity O

      2 words…that smile.

    • kimmeister

      O, how I would love to have fun in a tub with Fassie.

    • indigospade

      The bone ridges on the sides of his mouth and forehead make it look like his face was photoshopped on. That, combined with his bad hair and eyebrows, and I’m just not amused. MilaXX said it great though… that shower tile is interesting.

    • RebeccaKW

      His smile!  Those eyes!  Who cares about the clothes?  Other than, you know, he shouldn’t be wearing any.

      • Jill_3

         Up with smiles! Down with clothes! Let’s have grinning, naked Fassie standing in front of beautiful tiles, and then everybody’s happy.

        • RebeccaKW

           I’d be even happier if I was in the bathroom with him, and he was spraying me with the shower head in jaunty foreplay.

          • Jill_3

             Oooh, indeed. I would definitely enjoy some jaunty foreplay with the Fassbender.

        • http://needtherapy.tumblr.com/ skadi1

          This is the best comment ever.

    • http://twitter.com/jennsaysmeow Fifi LaRoux


    • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

      Oh, HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Wow, after several “meh” guyditorial posts, Esquire brings in a winner!

    • Carla_Charlton

      He doesn’t normally do anything for me, but NOW I get the appeal.

    • http://twitter.com/andakat andakat

      He’s completely adorable with that Cheshire cat grin.  And has fabulous screen presence.  I just wish he were able to dress himself in real life. 

      • http://www.facebook.com/seelebrennt Christina Diaz

        why would you want him to dress himself??

    • Pennymac

      “His penis was everything they said it was”  I didn’t hear this rumor. Can someone clue me in?

      • http://twitter.com/andakat andakat

        He walks around fully nude in Shame for a good minute and has nothing to be ashamed about.

      • http://howtofaint.tumblr.com/ How to Faint

        It stole every scene it was in, making its presence nearly palpable through the screen.

        • Jill_3

          It should have received star billing.

          • RebeccaKW

             It gets my vote for best actor.

      • http://profiles.google.com/claudiaberry Claudia Berry

        Clooney said Fassy can golf with his hands behind his back.  Mm-hmm.

    • Lina_bee

      Oh, man, from the neck up this is wonderful! The clothes are completely eh, but this man could charm a nun’s socks off.

    • Vaniljekjeks

      He is just so handsome!  The clothes were forgettable, the smile was not.  He is just to die for. 

      And I love that your first comment about Shame, aside from the fact that you liked it, was about his penis.  This is why I love you.   I am off to go order Shame on blu-ray… I want that in highest possible quality, thank you very much.  

    • LesYeuxHiboux

      Oh my god that smile.

    • egl48

      Shame is a wonderful movie — such a great character study.  

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_5UQHEKG5EDX4T6NMARUC565TPQ Amy

      If only we had a Fassie segment EVERY DAY..*swoon*

      • Jill_3

         We’ve had Musical Mondays, Thursday Thighs… can we just have Fassbender Fridays, please?

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=2066192 Melissa Mellon

      Oh, Michael Fassbender! I’d chase you out of my kitchen if I hadn’t preemptively super-glued your shoes to the floor.

    • http://twitter.com/ParrotTalkBack Ana R.

      Where IS he? An abandoned office with a fabulous shower? Or an apartment with a sad little corridor and an IKEA showroom kitchen?

      • http://twitter.com/bredalot Bridget Smith

        It looks like a hotel/motel to me, especially with the “Cleaners Are In” tag hanging off that doorknob.

    • Pants_are_a_must

      Definitely one of those “HANG THE CLOTHES! We want PERSONA!” editorials, which is hilarious, considering he would probably be able to wear sophisticated male fashion, when someone makes sure he doesn’t get all slobby.

      • PaulaBerman

         I was thinking, “Hang the clothes, I want to see his abs!”

    • SpcilK

      Yum, he’s super cute.

    • Jessica O’Connell

      “His penis is everything they said it was…” LOL Ugh I love you guys.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_RDEDI3ONWSVDQS5GXKKBIML3H4 Chase

      So cute!  Thank you so much for the Fassbender fix.  I needed that today.

    • Anathema_Device

      He is a cutie, isn’t he? 

    • EEKstl

      Haven’t seen “Shame” yet but already love MF.  But I REALLY want to feed him.  

    • Presumptuous Insect


    • Níkholas Méndez

      not a fan of his aesthetic, but damn if he did not look good in xmen, and damn if he does not look good here.

    • Dan_In_NYC

      Hot Aussies are the best kind of trouble.

      • Saoirse Lee

        That may well be true. 

        But what have they got to do with the half-Irish/half German Michael Fassbender? 😉

    • TieDye64

      Dude looks ridiculously amazing when he smiles. 

    • demidaemon

      The more editorials I see of him, the more attractive he becomes to me. And I like these weirdly staged yet casual scenes.

    • CatherineRhodes

      I agree regarding “Shame” — it was a terrific character study. And Carey Mulligan just didn’t quite fit, despite her gutsiness in showing pubes onscreen. 

    • quiltrx

      Silly editorial, but I do like seeing the smiling side of him.

    • http://kittysdrawings.com Esz

      My gosh – he’s even hotter when he smiles..


    • http://www.youtube.com/user/toodleskitty79?feature=guide AWStevens

      You know it’s a rumor he’s the father of January Jones’ kid, right?

      • bellafigura1

        Really????  Delicious!

    • bluefish

      Glad you liked the movie.  I  liked it very much also.  He looks so great in these photos.  That smile!  Love the one with the teacup.  He looks so young and happy.  He is also really great in A Dangerous Method playing Jung.  The film is flawed as hell but he and Vigo M. are terrific together — a true dream team.  Back to the clothes — LOVE the dark grey shirt in photos 3 and 4.  Would wear it to death if it were mine.

    • RzYoung

      I agree about Carey Mulligan in that film! I didn’t mind Shame but that scene where she sings was AWFUL!! She can’t sing and all meaningfulness in the words (which was tenuous at best) was ruined by her not being a singer. I enjoyed the film too but can’t say the same for my bf. 

    • P M

      Yes, it’s very standard, BUT: I love it when a man gives a cheeky look over his cup like that. Sadly, nobody’s ever flirted with me like that :(.
      Still, such mischief in his eyes <3 <3 <3

      • formerlyAnon

         “nobody’s ever flirted with me like that :(.”

        YET. Always tack on that ‘yet.’ !!

        • P M

           Good catch. I must use that line one of these days. Thanks formerlyAnon 😉

    • lordandtaylor

      He seems fun. But TLO is right, clothes are super boring in a T J Maxx kind of way.

    • Sunshine16

      Yum, come over to my house & play please!

    • mozzer0906

      That smile makes the photos sing.

    • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

      Wha?  We can see his penis?  Where?

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/6USTUMYN7QGLV4A7ELYJ4BDKDU vas

      Anyone knows what shirt it is that he’s wearing?

    • bitterk

      I love a genuine smile on a celebrity. Very refreshing!  Note to self, rent Shame immediately.  Better yet, buy Shame immediately.  

    • guest2visits

      Ryan Gosling take notes: this is a cover shot. It’s always nice when someone looks engaged in the moment. Or awake.