Lindsay Lohan is at High Alert

Posted on May 11, 2012

Lindsay Lohan’s entire body has become a color-coded terror alert chart.

Lindsay Lohan attends 2012 A&E Networks Upfronts in NYC.

Her legs are apparently at high alert for a terrorist attack, but her face appears to be in no immediate danger at all. Well. Not from terrorists, anyway.

Remember when we said it looked like she was at least trying to get her act together? Haha. Well… this appears to be “together.”

Honey, go home and loofah all that wood stain off your lower body, rip out those ratty extensions, throw out those shitty-ass Payless heels, and start over. You can keep the dress. We don’t love it, but it doesn’t offend us, either. Also, visible bobby pins are so very ’90s. Also, try using a mirror and keeping your eyes open the next time you apply makeup. Or better yet, pay someone to do it. We’re sure there are some talented, star-struck gays who would still give you a deal on their rates.

[Photo Credit: Paul Froggatt/PR Photos]

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