Pairs Division: Fergie and Duhamel

Posted on January 02, 2012

Darlings, those pain-in-the-ass celebrities all seem to have gone into hibernation over the holidays. Even the New Year’s Eve party step-and-repeats were awash in D-listers dressed like homeless people. Thankfully Josh and Ferg loathed the idea of a quiet, intimate NYE and hit the town, looking extremely lop-sided.

Fergie and Josh Duhamel attend New Year’s Eve party in Las Vegas. Fergie is wearing a Nicolas Jebran dress.

Nicolas Jebran Fall 2011 Couture Collection

 

HE: Is getting just a tad long in the tooth for the New Romantic/British schoolboy pastiche he’s trying for here. Actually, that’s not entirely accurate. It’s not that he’s too old for this look; it’s that he has no edge to him whatsoever. In looks and style, he’s the typically blandly good-looking white guy. This look isn’t edgy so much on its own anymore as it needs someone with a little edge to make it work. Try as he might to convince the world otherwise, Josh just isn’t that rock and roll. On a more practical level, he’s too tall and too long in the torso for the untucked shirt and skinny tie, which are giving him downright Na’vi proportions. Also, the pants look cheap (which is what always happens when you pair matte and shiny black pieces) and the shoes look more appropriate for a job interview. Score: 5/10. This is us being generous because we doubt there was much stylist input on this one.

SHE: Had a moment of frantic desperation when she realized, however unlikely the thought may be, that she didn’t have anything to wear for New Year’s Eve and scraped up a strip of her bathroom floor and wrapped it around herself. It’s actually not a bad dress at all, but boy, does it ever look heavy on her. She has a tendency to wear heavy-looking items, which aren’t always in her best interests since she’s short and curvy. It’s good that the silhouette is so simple. We’re pleasantly surprised at the relative lightness of her shoes (which also tend to be of the “15 lbs. a piece” variety). Makeup and hair is uncharacteristically soft, clean and pretty. We have to admit, she styled herself pretty well here, mitigating the heaviness of the dress by keeping things pretty simple.  Score: 8/10.

Combined score: 6.5/10, which is a shame, because she really got this one right. Hit him, Fergs.

[Photo Credit: PRN/PR Photos, flip-zone.com]

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  • MilaXX

    He looks a mess, in addition to all the errors you mentioned. he also has a good 4 inches of extra material puddling at his ankles. I’d give him a 3/10 cause he’s far too sloppy and under dressed standing next to his wife who at least put in some effort.
    She looks pretty good for Fergie. The dress looks like it weighs a tone, but I like the shoe and hair & makeup are pretty decent, maybe a shade to blonde. 7.5/10

    • P M

      These two are married?? oh.

      • http://beautyforrealgirls.blogspot.com/ accidental housewife

        I know! It’s one of the more bizarre matches, isn’t it? They’ve been married for at least a couple years, I believe, which, in Hollywoodland, seems like an eternity.

        • Lori

          They were married in the fall of 2010, so only a little over a year, but yeah, they seem like a really odd pairing and I can’t get used to them. Hollywood marriages being what they are, by the time I’m able to stop being surprised every time I see them together they’ll probably split. Not that I wish for them to get divorced or anything. Good luck guys! I hope you prove me wrong by having a long and happy marriage.

          • Anonymous

            They were married January 2009 … about a week shy of 3 years.

          • http://profiles.google.com/thisiscelia Celia

            Their 2010 ceremony was a vow-renewal thing after his cheating-with-a-Vegas-stripper thing blew over.

          • Rand Ortega

            Yeah! Just like Katy Perry & Russell Brand!

            (kidding)

        • P M

          I don’t care either way. It’s just that I don’t follow gossip and such. On further thought (I spared brain cells for this? Oh, for shame), yes, an odd couple.

    • http://www.GiftedCollector.com Nancy Abrams

      How can someone 8′ tall have pants that are too long?! He must shop at the VERY Big and Tall store.

      Her dress looks inflexible and uncomfortable.

  • http://twitter.com/LOfficielEbony TheVeryLivingEND

    That dress is fantastic, although I would have preferred the other one in the ad/editorial on Fergie Ferg because of the lighter weight of the dress (smaller stones, etc). Although, I’m sure she chose the shorter one because of proportion of the dress.  As for The Duhamel, I hatehatehate it when one part of a couple looks way under-dressed. In this case, he looks like he just rolled out of bed & had no idea where he was going: hotel party, quick run to WalMart, crackhouse… *sigh*  It’s a shame, really.

  • Patricia Biswanger

    I love the dress, and love that she wore a demure length instead of the much-too-short version the model is wearing.  That extra length may have added twenty or thirty pounds to the dress, but it looks so much better that way.

    He is just a mess.

    • Anonymous

      The length on the dress alone gets her bonus points.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_KEYJDIENR5MRK2NXJYKNOLWDFE Alexandria

    This is the best she’s looked in soooo long

  • http://twitter.com/kittenmasks kittenmasks

    God, who would’ve thought that I would ever say that Fergie looks really good? 2012 is definitely a new year for new things. Work it, Fergie!

    • Anonymous

      I know, right? I think this is the best I’ve ever seen her look. He, on the other hand, looks ridiculous.

  • Anonymous

    I can’t like this dress. It looks like the glass tile in my shower. At least she put in some effort, because he looks like he is doing the male version of the walk of shame. 

    • Anonymous

      I didn’t know that walks of shame were gender-specific!

      • Anonymous

        They’re not, but the fashion result as one skulks out is slightly different.

  • Anonymous

    You red my mind on the dress… although my thoughts were more in the ‘Divine Design picking the kitchen backsplash’ neighborhood.  The shoes I hate but that is because I hate any shoe with a back zipper. 

    He is too sloppy for words. Which indicates it was a good idea to scotchgard that blazer.

  • foodycat

    See, if he was in 6th form and I was in 4th form, I would think he was the most divine creature alive, with that non-threatening schoolboy thing he has going on. From where I am now, it doesn’t work. She looks good, although I agree with bloggertobenamedlater the dress looks like bathroom tiles.

  • Anonymous

    Milaxx said: “She looks pretty good for Fergie.”

    Damning with faint praise but very true! Her center part roots aren’t as dramatic as usual and am I right in thinking it looks like she actually is wearing this dress somewhat longer than the original? Very un-Fergie like!

    But overall, this gets an “meh” from me as these two are so uninteresting, unappealing, etc. Would much rather read your next recap of Downton Abbey than look at this pair.

    Wishing you TLO better luck for this New Year as those pesky celebrities dig themselves out of their hibernating holes so the bitter kittens can have at ‘em.

    srq

  • Anonymous

    She looks pretty good , considering…
    And I agree  his proportions are thrown off by the untucked shirt. A little Stretch Armstrongish.

  • A. Valera

    Just once, JUST ONCE, I would love to see her without that damn middle part in her hair.  JUST ONCE, STACY ANN!

    • Eva Whitsett

      AGREE. I said out loud to her photo, Fergie, PLEASE get a different style this year; I’m begging you.

  • Anonymous

    The minute she pulled out that dress he should have pulled out his best suit and tie. 

    She looks fabulous – 9/10
    He looks like he just rolled off the couch – 3/10

  • Cheri Lee

    She really goes for that “I a rock/pop/hip hop wannabe” look and that majority of the time she looks like a royal mess. She got it right this time because let the dress take center stage. The shoes are on the border line of fighting for attention with the dress but overall she looks great. 

    He looks like he is trying too hard to match her persona and why he would want to do that is beyond me.

  • Anonymous

    She looks good, but I guess that’s a standing-only type of dress, because there’s no way you can sit comfortably in that dress.

    • Anonymous

      That thing must have a helluva lining, because -just like AmEx dress did- I feel nipple-pinching and butt marking. 

  • Anonymous

    Oh wow, I never knew she was short…now I like her a little more. Go short girls! 

  • Anonymous

    She looks amazing – 9/10. Hair up would’ve added that extra point. He looks ok from the waist up – tuck in the shirt, add a belt and cooler shoes and he’d be right on – 5/10.

  • Anonymous

    I’m gasping for air just looking at her. In the first picture of her alone you can see that when she leans to one side the dress stays erect. How did she get to the event? She must have been transported in a standing position.

  • http://beautyforrealgirls.blogspot.com/ accidental housewife

    He looks like he’s wearing his little brother’s shirt. I could almost live with this look if he hadn’t bought that shirt in the kid’s department. The bigger sin, however, is how sloppy he is. Did he just come off a two week bender in Vegas? He’s the frat brother who embarrasses all the other frat boys. 5/10 is indeed generous. I’d go for 3/10, and even that feels too high.

    I love Fergie, but she often looks insane. She’s 100 times better than usual here. While “bathroom floor tiles” was also the first thing I thought of, I love this dress. It’s gorgeous and totally her. I hate silver shoes and I’m not crazy about that style either, but they’re Fergie shoes through and through. She’s a glammed up, pulled together version of herself here, and I’m tempted to give her a 10/10.

  • Anonymous

    She, surprisingly, does look pretty good.  Looks like it’d be a standing up type of dress as bending it to sit looks problematic. 

    He’s a mess. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1326120071 Gaby Ripoll

    I have to say, bonus points to Fergie for altering this NYE-appropriate disco-ball dress to make it LONGER! Should have kept the belt to aid the shape, though. I’d give her a generous 9.5 because this is an almost perfect NYE look. 

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_66KPZ36LMHMRQOX3HIJGHRNNUA MandyM

    She looks like a disco ball but that’s a decent look for her.

  • margaret meyers

    Fergie looks better than we have seen her in a while.  He needs to pay extra to get a leather jacket that fits right:  the waist is hitting him too high, and the coat is so short he’s wearing a “bum freezer” even though it is styled like a suit jacket.

  • Anonymous

    She looks like a female disco ball, but in a good way, I guess? It’s not an offensive dress, and she wisely opted to not go down Lea Michele road and kept it on the longer side.

    He looks like a total douche.

  • Anonymous

    she looks pretty amazing, if you ask me. as much as i loath fergie, she often looks pretty good in red carpet pictures… at least the ones that make it on tlo.

    he looks decent too, im not seeing the problem. the shirt might have been better tucked in.

    wait what, those two are a COUPLE?

  • Anonymous

    They’re sweet together.  I wish he could convince her (or preferably she would realize) that she’s pretty.  Fergie always makes me a little sad. I like her and I always get the impression she doesn’t feel “really” pretty, hence the almost costume-like dressing and usual heavy makeup and alleged plastic surgery.

  • Anonymous

    I love the dress, but am tired-to-death of her raggedy hair style.  Time to shake it up, Ferg.

  • Anonymous

    I usually hate the way Fergie dresses, so this is a pleasant surprise. She didn’t wear the dress super short, and I think the bulk on the dress actually works in her favor b/c she can’t wear it too tight…meaning, it has to fit properly to stay on and we can’t see every nook and cranny in body. She does need to go a shade or two darker on the hair, though. It is washing her out.

    And him, well, you’re 100% right there, too.

  • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

    Sorry, Josh looks like a MASSIVE douche canoe, and That is not Fergie’s dress, no matter how much she wants it to be.  Love the shoes, though.

  • http://modernretrowoman.com DrJulieAnn

    I read that this was a two-for-one paid appearance (http://tv.yahoo.com/news/kim-kardashian-600-000-tao-fergie-10ak-las-183105688.html) and am wondering how that impacted their clothing choices.

  • Anonymous

    Her dress looks like “glue tiles to the vase” craft project.

    • Anonymous

      eggs-zack-lee!  i instantly thought of a wine bottle with glass tiles and grout piled on it with a putty knife.  not a good look for her figure, which often looks like it’s squeezed into some kind of restraint to keep it from escaping and  ??  god knows what would happen then.  you guys are too generous.  although the shoes are awesome.  the one saving grace is that she went for the longer length.  the mini would have looked even worse- we’ve all seen that above-the-knee area on her at least one time too many.  the jewelry on the models looks like it’s made out of produce from the super market.  i’ve been reading the Tlo archives (while enjoying my week of post-holiday relaxation) and flashed on that embellishment that Korto made out of cherry tomatoes and peppers.  and just what are those two girls doing in that photo?    

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3AJ237ND3GAHDQJZ4TLCO4WLRA Emily

    She looks really great.  Hair and makeup look nice and the shoes are awesome.  The dress is a close one, but I think overall it’s working.  he looks like a mess.  it’s a shame.

  • http://profiles.google.com/thisiscelia Celia

    She needs to stick with this more natural hair and makeup, it makes her look younger and softer. I’m glad just relieved she didn’t try to McGyver the dress to fit her this time.

  • http://desilluist.tumblr.com/ Briarnoir

    I never thought I’d say this. I love Fergie’s dress. She’s a 10 for me.

  • Anonymous

    Love her accessories – the shoes and the not-well-dressed husband. But that’s all.
    (She really needs to get her hairline threaded. Better a high forehead than low, always. Otherwise her hair looks nice here.)

  • http://twitter.com/sillytwigg twigg

    Why is she wearing a vase?

  • Anonymous

    Why is she wearing the mosaic from the subway station?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=768540908 Badriya Al-Badi’a

    I actually totally disagree about her styling with this dress–if you’re going to wear a lizard lady V dress, then go for broke with the hair and make up and shoes.  The restraint just look half-hearted.

  • Anonymous

    Word, word, word to everything you said about Duhamel. I hate to give Fergie credit for anything but yeah I guess she look aight.

  • Anonymous

    She looks pretty damn good here, which is a nice surprise. Hair, makeup and shoes are hot and I don’t hate the dress. 8/10

    He, on the other hand, looks like a cheap, sloppy hot mess. I agree with you guys on all counts and it looks like he just threw some stuff on hoping it would work. And he really is the epitome of the blandly good-looking white guy. With no edge. Whatsoever. 3/10

  • https://profiles.google.com/104791269167429064986/about?hl=en Judy S

    I really only know her from your posts, and that dress is ridiculous, but she looks great. Completely comfortable, which makes no sense in a dress apparently made of rocks. That’s what it’s all about.

  • http://pissiechrissie.tumblr.com/ Chrissie

    That’s the perfect dress for her to ring in the New Year in. You can tell she put some thought into it.

  • Anonymous

    I suspect the other dress might have suited her better but gotta say, she looks pretty okay here. He looks like a douche.

  • Anonymous

    She looks much better than usual. Black licorice chunk dress! 

  • CQAussie

    Hit him with your dress Fergie!  Yeah, she does look quite pretty here.  Too bad she can’t/won’t do this more often.  He looks a mess.  He’s so cute though but still….a mess.

  • Anonymous

    Can you imagine before they went out? 
    He: Looks in the mirror and say ” good to go”
    She: looks at him and says: “You look great honey, let’s roll”
    I say: Buy a mirror

  • Mary McClelland

    I actually think this is a really interesting dress. And it oddly suits her. This is the best I’ve seen her look in a while. I’m just gonna block him out. 

  • http://twitter.com/Nancer Nancer

    Fergie looks great! The dress is a bit too long – it could be taken up one row of tiles and that would be perfect, but this is just a quibble. Overall, she looks slammin’!

  • Cathy S

    She looks great; he looks awful. Can’t we just not score him?

  • Anonymous

    To me it looks like somebody went to Michael’s picked up some mosaics with the weekly coupon and tiled her for a craft project. The grout looks pretty good. 

    Not feeling the love here for either one.

  • Anonymous

    They are a hot couple (he could wear a paper bag and she finally got those eyebrows right) and I predict she will be preggers sometime in 2012.

  • Anonymous

    Nice of Fergs to wear mirrors for those who cant stand to actually look at her.