Majestic Coldness (NSFW)

Posted on December 15, 2011

Darlings, we are, right as you’re reading this, walking through the doors of a special screening of  Season 2 of Downton Abbey with several of the cast members, so if you’ll excuse us, we have some internal squealing to do. You will have to amuse yourselves with your pretty for the day: a bevy of very intense young women in the throes of hypothermia, wearing some really pretty, brightly colored dresses. Discuss.

 

E!stilo Magazine
Editorial: “Majestic coldness”
Models: Paulina Papierska, Anna Zawada, Iza Deger
Hair: Magdalena Pietrzak, Lena Zięba, Zaneta Dlugosz
Makeup: Magdalena Pietrzak, Jolanta Surmańska, Lena Zięba
Stylist: Justyna Polska
Photographer: Mirella Szymoniak

[Source and Photo Credit: designscene.net]

 

    • Anonymous

      Hahaha. I can’t. They look so dumb.

      • Anonymous

        Clothes are nice though.

    • Lauren Maier

      Pretty, but models, close your mouths!  You look like sex dolls.  

      It’s…I see Scared Woodland Elf (fourth from the bottom), Princess Leia Elf (below Woodland Elf), and Unnecessary Nipple Elf (Sheer blue dress).  In all seriousness, I love the colors and the clothes and Nipple Elf’s jewelry, but the close-ups of the white eyebrows/eyelashes is bugging me for some reason.  

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1260924501 Frank Butterfield

        Love your descriptions! Exactly right!

      • Anonymous

        for some reason, such as it’s so ugly i can’t see anything else?  how can she keep that white crap out of her eyes?  ickickick….

        • Lauren Maier

          That about sums it up!  
          Speaking of, I’ve decided the third from the top is Angry Cannibal Princess Elf.  She has jewels crowning her head, why is she biting herself and looking so pissed?  

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1043171034 Tadiana Walton Jones

        Their mouths are open in shock and consternation because the Evil Frost King is attacking their fair land of Faerie.  We need Legolas to rally the troops.

    • http://twitter.com/Elizabethann1 Elizabeth Denton

      STUNNING. and so jellz about Downton Abby. Please tell us how is was!!

      • Anonymous

        Seriously. You lucky little bitches.

        • Jessica Rowe

          I cannot BELIEVE you guys.  I am doing the Downton Abbey tour in the UK in June and am already so excited!  You lucky lucky lucky SOBs!!!!

    • Anonymous

      I couldn’t care less about the photos because I have full and complete T Lo envy.  I love DA and am wildly anticipating Season 2.  You get to see it early AND with some cast members?  You lucky, lucky bitches.

      • Anonymous

        Seriously! 

        TLo, I hope we’ll get to hear about it!

      • http://twitter.com/TMamBo Therese Bohn

         I second that! I finally caught up with season 1 on Netflix and can’t wait for S2  — A full report please!!!!!   If Dame Maggie is there, I’d DIE!  Thanks :-D

      • Anonymous

        If you truly can’t wait, watch Season 2 online. Now I am waiting impatiently for the Christmas Special!

    • http://profiles.google.com/shawna.ready shawna ready

      Why feature the same dress twice?

    • Anonymous

      Styled and photographed by Poles!  Yay! 

    • Jessica Goldstein

      You’re watching DA? Screw the clothes. Spill!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1260924501 Frank Butterfield

      Photos? What?  I read “Season 2 of Downton Abbey” and became instantly jealous! Please drop an extra curtsy to Dame Maggie for me!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1260924501 Frank Butterfield

      Oh wait… one question… is the beehive on its way back? Unnecessary Nipple Elf seems to have one.

    • Anonymous

      Oooh, pleeeeease dish about Downton Abbey!  I’ve had the S2 premiere date on my calendar for months & months.  Can’t wait…it’s less than a month away now! 

    • Anonymous

      You get Downton Abbey and we get…this? I am horribly envious.

    • Anonymous

      I’ll squeal externally for you! I’m really looking forward to Downton Abbey’s return.

      These photos? Eh, not really doing it for me.

    • Anonymous

      who cares about these bath puff clothes and the creepy animae looking models, we want all the goods on DA2

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2CNDPMVO4W23R5TVC2QMTJ5BZE Heather

        I agree! The clothes are horrible (loofah dress) and the women look like photoshop renditions of blow-up dolls. Tell us about DA!!!

    • Anonymous

      this is gross, but I don’t expect much from fashion edit anymore. 

    • Anonymous

      The strawberry blond wearing the grey ruffled dress(?) belongs in Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland.

    • http://www.facebook.com/julia.mills Julia Mills

      second to last gal has an invisible cell phone!

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ZBFH32YG44LIIZYLSQPMBXMYCU Sarah

        She’s making the call to the UN : “I’ve got ALL THE SAFETY PINS IN THE WORLD!!!! MWAHAHA! What will you fools do now!!!”

    • Sarah Lynnae

      I think this was Bjork about ten years ago.

    • marilyn

      Is this an intro to kiddie porn?  

    • BerlinerNYC

      Yuck. This is my pretty for the day? I feel like I need an emergency eye wash. Everything with that is wrong. Didn’t we see Olivieuier do that same nasty-ass shit with the eyebrows? I feel like these are screencaps from some creepy-ass PlayStation game I would never ever allow my child to play.

    • Anonymous

      I feel mean saying this but this looks exactly like season 2 of Downton Abbey i.e. trying too hard to be clever and beautiful and ending up looking ridiculous. UK and Ireland viewers amiright or amiright?! ( Also why is the girl in the third photo giving her own fingers a blow job?!).

      • Anonymous

        oh no, really? How sad. (I’ll still watch, of course.)

        • Anonymous

          Oh I still watched every episode – worth watching for the costumes and scenery and Dame Maggie Smith alone – it’s not ALL bad, it’s just that it turned into a bit of a soap opera with extremely predictable outcomes. Like, Dallas style plotlines. I’m still looking forward to watching the Christmas special though so they haven’t turned me off completely!

      • Anonymous

        You aren’t wrong ;)

      • Anonymous

        Please nooooooo!  Say it’s not so.  I have high hopes for DA 2.   

        • Anonymous

          Ah, you’ll still enjoy it I’m sure, just maybe lower your expectations a little bit.

      • Anonymous

        I also heard S2 isn’t that good, which is a real disappointment since S1 was so amazing. I wonder if the producers had no plans for a sequel and just rushed into making one when the first season was such a huge international success.

        • Anonymous

          Yeah, I think the writers just tied themselves into a few knots and then gave themselves very predictable ways out. There’s a few ‘are you kidding me?!’ moments. Some audiences will love it, but others won’t considering they set a bit of a high standard in season 1.

          • Anonymous

            The pacing is all over the place. Years to resolve some things, and other things raced through at breakneck speed. And far too many cliches. I wished they’d dumped some of the more stupid side stories and concentrated on developing the main ones more thoroughly.

            I enjoyed it, but I had to take it at face value and try not to groan out loud LOL! Julian Fellowes can do better.

    • http://asskickingadviser.com/ Ass Kicking Adviser

      Um. Wow. I don’t know where to start.
      I hate/love you for being at the Downton Abbey premier. I think my veins are exploding from the greenery.
      I love this editorial. I love it. It’s so interesting and over the top. Yes, some of the clothes look like they have tulle-tumors but most of them are incredible and the styling and photography are surreal. Love.
      Face it boys, you knew you had to throw us a bone because if you just posted that you were at the DA premiere without handing out a treat to the barking dogs, we would have mauled you.

    • CQAussie

      SQUEE!!!!  Downton Abbey!!!!  Can’t wait for season 2!!

      The clothes are beautiful.  The models look weird but I guess that was the point =D 

    • Susan Walker

      I am sruck dumb with envy by your screening outing.  I hope it was as fabulous as I imagine.

    • Anonymous

      Oh please say this means you’ll blog the second season of Downton as it airs!  It’s soapy AND gorgeous, and I know you would have such wonderful commentary on both aspects.  (Especially in season two!)

    • MilaXX

      Clothes look pretty and the makeup is skillfully done, but the body distortions are kinda creepy.

      Also kudos to you on the Downtown Abby screening. Please give details later. (non spoilery of course)

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Erika-Shor/100000024452553 Erika Shor

      For the first time reading this blog, I am actually JEALOUS!

    • Anonymous

      So weird it works.  Why can’t American Vogue ever do anything this interesting?  But…we’ve just found the only thing ickier than invisible eyebrows (are they out soon, please?): bushy, frost-covered eyebrows.  Or maybe the latter are to mock the former.  Nah, just icky.

      Downton Abbey–double squeal!

      • Anonymous

        ickier?  How about a bank’s customer service lady with dark full eyebrows she teases into spikes, and matches with over-extended eyelashes?  This was someone walking around with a job, not a model in a silly editorial.

        • Anonymous

          fabulous, even moreso if she’s either doing it completely on purpose [better] or doesnt really notice [not quite as good].

        • Anonymous

          I feel like I have to re-state that last sentence – as silly as the editorial may be, any young woman who courts pneumonia so that her image in a magazine can be gawped at by total strangers is definitely earning her paycheck.

          However, I think a banking professional should avoid styling herself like a model in a silly editorial.

    • Anonymous

      Sweet Jesus, this is fabulous!  Makes me think of The Swinton, but girly.

    • Anonymous

      Sort of a silly ed, but I like some of the colors (don’t really care for the designs, though)…and the jewelry is all quite cool.  I especially like the safety-pin pieces, and I will definitely need that purple and silver headdress (probably a converted necklace?) when I am officially crowned Queen of All That is Purple.

    • Anonymous

      I feel like I should like this more than I do!

      Ah, Downton. Been and gone and just waiting on the Christmas special. ;)

    • Anonymous

      One must conclude that a seated model shoving her feet forward to feature the platform stiletto-heels is really saying, “I can’t even stand up in these, but here.  They’re fierce.”

    • bloodshothalfblind

      season 2 of downton abbey is FABULOUS!  i cannot wait for the xmas special!

    • Anonymous

      Jebus. All I can think of is Black Hole Sun. And that’s not a good thing.

    • Lattis

      Damned if you guys have not made the most fabulous job for yourselves!!!!! Season 2 of Downton Abbey with several of the cast members?!!! well fuck me. You lucky bastards. :)

      Yeah, well, we have been re-watching The Wire and my language is suffering a serious decline in standards. I actually had to edit out several more fucks and mothafuckers and shiiiiiiiiiits out of that comment.

    • Anonymous

      TLo and Downton = Yay!  These images – freakin’ creepy as hell.  Gross.

    • Ruth Gottesman

      NOOOO! You were at the Downton Abbey preview at the Times Center in NYC? I was at the preview at the Times Center! It would have made the night even more amazing if I had known two of my favorite bloggers were there! How gorgeous were those black dresses that Mary and Edith wore in the dinner scene during the preview? Gorgeous!

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_HBS4KWJ6XTPDEL2JMD37ZS5YHA Ben

      disturbing. that main pic model

    • Anonymous

      just checking: whose work are these pictures not safe for?

    • Pashmina Velour

      “Well, no, it wasn’t difficult. I never quite understood the need to say where you had spent the weekend.”  - Cecil Beaton

    • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

      eek.  They all look possessed, and stricken with frostbite.  And most of the clothes are absurdly unwearable.

    • Anonymous

      I’m sorry but the girl in the gray shirt/dress thingie (picture two) looks exactly like my kitchen scrubbie.  After it’s been used a bunch.  NO NO NO.  

    • Anonymous

      possessed, frostbite, space aliens, fashion zombies…whatever

      Downton Abbey, cool, can’t wait. Love that historic fashion commentary. sniff. Mad Men’s coming back too, yes?

    • Anonymous

      I watched Season 2 online and my crush on Dan Stevens has grown to the point of absurdity. So if you meet him, tell him there is a little American girl who wants to bone him. His wife may join.

      I’ll stop being creepy now and be bitchy instead. The models look freaky. 

    • http://www.gprotocol.com Advaita Waikar

      The peek-a-boo one looks scary as hell. I like the concept and styling but I wish they found a better approach for the make up.

    • Anonymous

      Waddup with the crazy, ‘I’m a serial killer, but I’m taking a break from death and destruction to smize at you’, eyes?

      Also, ruffle-leggings? Lithe 13 year olds and haters of pie might look presentable in ruffle-leggings, but I am neither and therefore must hate.The safety-pin jewelry is really kickass, though. 

    • Anonymous

      i like the sea cucumber, i like it better in purple than in grey.
      that jewelry in the bottom, there? guarantee you that i am two degrees of separation, at most, from someone who did the same thing & did it better c1975-1979. not just me, but lets say there are probably three hundred people still living who are equidistant from all the rest of us & the safety pin necklace encircles us all, no matter where we are, no matter how far, etc & ect.
      i am unsure whether or not i like that she looks like she has a faerie fever given to her by a member of the fae folk that somehow turns the fever rings around her eyes glitter pink instead of sickly red. she doesnt look any less sickly this way, just very cold if e’er so wee & slightly magical.
      i guess thats more fun than mononucleosis. or shingles, say [having had that one when i was not much older than she is here, i can promise you that].
      hope you had a happy. or two.

    • Anonymous

      weird.

    • Anonymous

      was able to see DA  Season 2 while in AU.  Just sorry I missed out on the Xmas special…  Unbearably jealous you’re hanging with the cast, but since you are still capable of posting – or breathing – I’m taking solace that Dame Maggie wasn’t among them.

      Season 2 is pure soap.  Better quality soap than most brands being peddled, but soap.  There is also a dress Michelle Dockery wears in 2 episodes that I would do a contract kill for if I thought I could get in it.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

      The white eyebrows are a bit strange, but some of the clothes and photos I love. 

    • Call me Bee

      Good for you guys getting to watch DA with cast members.  Green with envy here….
      Anyway–I love this editorial.  Big-eyed Alison from ANTM would have rocked this!! 

    • Anonymous

      LOve. I would love to go to a party were everyone showed up dressed like this.  Especially the hair..the aqua and purple…. and the ruffled pantalettes. I wonder what the men would wear.

      • Anonymous

        “I wonder what the men would wear.”

        Men from my fantasy world or real world men?
        Sadly the men in my life, whom I love dearly, would wear jeans and nice and sweater. Sigh …

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_CQPXLNCBM5CZSHZZXJDHPVFS7E Buffy

      I like Princess Leia Elf’s outfit (thanks Lauren for that description!) but the makeup kind of reminds me of Oompa Loompas…

    • Anonymous

      Winsome and kinda freaky… love it, particularly the first shot with the giant shoes in the foreground and the one with the girl on the mossy rocks.  I wish the location were credited in editorials. 

      edi said it more eloquently (per usual) but I remember that safety pin jewelry too.  Seems like it reappears every few decades.

    • Anonymous

      It’s like the photographer kind of gave up and told them to make kewpie doll eyes and bite their fingers. The dresses sure are pretty but the models are distracting in a bad way. I do like what he was trying to go for though—weird, funky spoiled alien princesses (at least that’s where my imagination’s taking me).

    • Anonymous

      looks like the sugar plum fairy’s sweet 16.

    • Anonymous

      Downton Abbey! Jelly. Alien-model face annoys me.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_CIPKMOXHLA5KG34HMH55OXHCVM Angel H.

      I’m just not sure where the inspiration was with this spread. Some of the pictures look very “fairy tale” while others look a little “party monster”. (Fairy party monsters?) It’s just confusing to me.

    • Anonymous

      so contrived

    • Anonymous

      Honey, if you’re so cold your face frosts over, cover your nipples.

    • Anonymous

      Love the clothes…kind of disturbing styling though. But more importantly…DOWNTON ABBEY!!!??? Sooooooo jealous.

    • Anonymous

      Urk! Disfunctional fairies. The evil wizard has put a spell on them!

    • Anonymous

      I find the makeup very off-putting but the overall styling appealing in a ‘quaint illustrations in a book I can’t afford’ way.

      The ensemble with the matching ruffled leggings and collar is my favorite. I like the safety pin jewelry.  Most of the rest of the jewelry looks like it should be made of plastic, open from the back and come with tiny dolls or ponies inside.

      On to more important news: I think you guys have officially crossed the line from”popular fashion bloggers” to “noted bloggers of popular culture with an emphasis on t.v and fashion.”

      I know it’s been brought up before, but keep turning over ideas for your first book. You’ll know when the right opportunity (combined with the right backing to get rights to the images) strikes. I’m thinking coffee table-style, but I could be mistaken.

    • Anonymous

      will someone please tell me what NSFW stands for?

      • Anonymous

        Not Safe For Work.

    • http://angryfemur.tumblr.com Andrea Lane

      Ok, is anyone else reminded of an America’s Next Top Model judging session? I can hear Tyra’s crazy in my mind.

      Oh, god, GET IT OUT!

    • R. L.

      NSFW means Not Safe For Work viewing.  I assume that it’s NSFW because of the showing of nips.

    • Anonymous

      Nope.

    • Anonymous

      Okay, that model is like a kindergartner, right? Shit, I’m old.

    • Anonymous

      I hate it.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3AJ237ND3GAHDQJZ4TLCO4WLRA Emily

      All I can think of is Tilda Swinton.

    • Anonymous

      Anyone know where was this photographed?  The only photos I enjoyed from this editorial were the ones where the locale had a hand in the shot too.

    • Anonymous

      wow. bad photoshop, + off-center accessories + stupid poses = college art project.

    • spooki C

      Hideous styling. Why do they all have dry cracked lips? Too bad that’s the least of the problems with the makeup.

      Any way, I fucking love the shoes in that first pic.

    • Anonymous

      Like the “color story” here, but hate the concept. It seems kind of abusive — what’s pretty about a woman in the throes of freezing to death?

    • Anonymous

      I kinda want those ruffled leggings!!

    • Anonymous

      Some nice pieces scattered throughout.

    • http://profiles.google.com/laurenjeanstm Lauren St Martin

      Oh, I love those frilly leggings!!! 

    • Anonymous

      this is so weird

    • Anonymous

      this is so weird

    • http://twitter.com/anacedillo Ana Cedillo

      what on earth is this?

    • Anonymous

      The model with the scary eyes (red hair, short, grey dress) looks about 10 years old.

    • http://twitter.com/mellafe natalia h

      Everything is so, so pretty. The clothes, I mean. I wouldn’t wear it but it’s pretty.

    • Anonymous

      does this one really count as “pretty for the day”–especially, dear uncles, when you’re off with the cast of Downton Abbey???
      Time for this niece to throw a temper tantrum….

    • http://profiles.google.com/eden.hemming e h

      Too many 12-year-olds and too much Photoshop (or not enough, depending on how you want to look at it).

    • Anonymous

      So, women of color don’t ever get cold? That’s my takeway from this.

    • Anonymous

      Capital C creepy

    • AMartel

      Underaged, underclothed, and underdressed.  Rather hideous on many levels.

    • AMartel

      Underaged, underclothed, and underdressed.  Rather hideous on many levels.