Chloe Sevigny in NYC

Posted on December 19, 2011

We cannot tell you how thrilled we are to learn that Chloe Sevigny continues her red carpet performance art EVEN WHEN THERE ISN’T A RED CARPET.

Let’s see who she’s playing today!

Meet Lizbeth, a super-serious ’80s corporate lawyer. She’s all stern and buttoned up during the day, but at night, she hits the after-hours clubs on the Lower East Side and does cocaine while cheering on the Dominican breakdancers who worship her every move. Then she has sex with a stranger in an alleyway full of homeless people, gets into a fistfight with some prostitutes who called her a gnarly skank, and drops by Andy’s to party with Keith and Jean-Michel, where she scores one last bump before heading home to button herself up again for another day of corporate warfare.

But she’s keeping the shoes she won in that fight.

[Photo Credit: WireImage]

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  • http://twitter.com/1carmelita 1carmelita

    I like that she has a day/night purse. Wonder what she’s carrying?

    • Anonymous

      I had thought it was two clutches!

      • Anonymous

        and i thought it was a book!

      • http://twitter.com/1carmelita 1carmelita

        I thought that, too, but I bet it’s just a 2-sided bag.

    • iCouture

      Most likely not a mirror.

      • Anonymous

        Insert obligatory *oh snap*

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1045295912 Charles Purdy

      Powerful pharmaceutical drugs, darling.

  • Anonymous

    Winner, 2011 Ann Heche Award for Celebrity Most Likely to Wander the Suburbs Claiming to be an Alien Princess.

    • Lisa

      Fabulous!

  • Anonymous

    Hmm what I thought was Chloe was going for a post-gender raggedy Annie/Andy. What would that be Raggedy An?

    • Anonymous

      LOL in public.  Darn you, lobsterlen!

    • Anonymous

      I thought TLo had the hands down funniest take on this ensemble. When I read yours, I knew I was wrong.

      Well played.

  • Anonymous

    “But she’s keeping the shoes she won in the fight.” Hilarious. She’s Flashdance’s little sister–she went the corporate route, but still has dance moves in case she needs to throw down.

  • http://twitter.com/LaurenJeanSTM Lauren Jean

    Not to be a downer, but I just keep expecting to hear she and Paz De La Huerta passed on in a pile of their own filth. And as entertaining as it is to watch, I can’t help but hope they both pull it together.

    Stepping off my high horse now…

    Girl looks fricken nuts. And I’m enjoying every moment of it.

    • http://profiles.google.com/shannonlstewart Shannon Stewart

      You know, though, there’s never really been much indication that Chloe was dressing this way because she’s drunk/stoned/high.  I think she’s just insane.

      • Anonymous

        and i think she truly is into it from a performance art level.  she’s active in the art world and recently made an art film with some insanely rich guy who then presented a performance piece to some hundred close friends on his private island in greece, starring chloe.  i think the girl is out there, but in a creative non-psychotic way.  i’ve always loved her.  and nicolette was my favorite sister wife.

        i do feel she’s ready for a new hairstyle.

        • http://twitter.com/NC_Meg Megan

          I agree with Shannon. She never struck me as someone who needed to get her shit together but as someone who doesn’t care what people think about her and/or what she wears. Sometimes I get a pretentious vibe. That said, I can’t stand her and agree with sleah, something has to be done with the hair.

      • Anonymous

        In that case, maybe Chloe can take Paz under her wing and show her how to channel the the crazy in an equally entertaining but less destructive way.

    • Lisa

      Oh, honey, don’t feel bad!  She’s Paz’s kindred spirit!

  • Anonymous

    Good Lord.

  • Maria Rosenfire

    What is this I don’t even–

    That suit just does not make sense. On any level. However, I would steal both her houndstooth Oxford and her platforms, which look like what Dorothy would have worn in a pornographic reimagining of the Wizard of Oz.

    • Anonymous

      Ahh, now I’m going to have to spend the next few hours thinking of a title for that movie.

      Actually, there must surely be a porn Wizard of Oz already, considering that there’s a porn reimagining of everything (so I’m told!). Anybody know its name?

      • Anonymous

        Jizzard of Oz?

        • Anonymous

          Wizzing on Oz (puts a new spin on yellow brick road)

  • Anonymous

    It’s not even a bad outfit, but she just looks so stupid in that second picture.

    • http://beautyforrealgirls.blogspot.com/ accidental housewife

      She somehow always manages to look stupid. However, I actually like this.  She seldom wears clothes that make sense, but I think this looks natural on her. I even kind of like the haircut. It’s awful, by which I mean it looks badly cut, but it suits her for some reason.

      This might be the first time I ever said anything positive about The Sev’s get-ups. My entire world is turned upside down.

  • Anonymous

    I’m dying over your “Lizbeth” narrative. AMAZING. 

  • Anonymous

    Something about it also says “mime” to me.

  • Anonymous

    Your Chloe posts complete me. 

  • Sara__B

    Thanks for the laugh, T Lo. I was totally confused by these photos. Hair, glasses, lipstick so unflattering. Shapeless suit, hooker shoes. WTF?  Then I read your piece, and it all became clear. Her public appearances are performance art. I had completely forgotten.

  • Stephen Bornstein

    OMG…….it’s a transexual walk of shame.

  • Anonymous

    That’s no woman.  That’s Jens Voigt in drag.
     

    • Anonymous

      I never saw it before, but damn, you’re right!

    • Anonymous

      And now I can’t unsee it. hahaaa

  • Anonymous

    You guys are so creative. She just looks like she borrowed her Dad’s old suit to me.

  • Anonymous

    OMG, she looks like Dorothy Michaels without the curls. Please make it stop!!

  • Anonymous

    Shoes are fabulous, but I thought she was auditioning for an Annie Hall remake.

  • Ramona Boersma

    I feel like your Chloe Sevigny character posts must be the most fun posts to write ever. They are certainly the most fun to read.

    • http://profiles.google.com/shannonlstewart Shannon Stewart

      I know! Wouldn’t you just love to be in the room when they’re identifying Chloe’s current character?!?  I imagine that it’s even better when voiced.

  • Anonymous

    Awful on every count.

  • Rand Ortega

    You had me at “Meet Lizbeth”! ROFLMAO!

  • Call me Bee

    Holy cow.  I actually like this look–the fab shoes really nail it.  But whose hair is Chole wearing?  Certainly not hers….!

    • Cathy S

      I agree. I love everything but the hair. The hair is horrible.

    • Lulu Lafurge

      I love her look, too. Wow. If I were that young, I’d wear that outfit and feel fabulous in it.

  • Anonymous

    Oh.  I thought it was Roy Orbison drag.  No?

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_OSYAJATXUH3QX7ZDDF52GXG4PU Janie R

      I thought it was Robert Downey Jr. in drag. I mean, really, it could be him!

    • http://twitter.com/ILikeShiny Cindi Williams

      I dunno, you guys. That first pic is giving me total Johnny-Depp-as-Willy-Wonka drag vibes.

    • Anonymous

      When I read Roy Orbison, I thought of KD Lang :)

    • Anonymous

      Linda Hunt.

      • http://twitter.com/ILikeShiny Cindi Williams

        Ha! I thought you meant Linda Tripp at first, and I totally saw it. I was going to give you props for kickin’ it 90s style.

  • Anonymous

    Is she carrying TWO purses? 

    Not much else to say about the rest of it.

  • Anonymous

    lol! 

    I love all her quirky personalities.  She obviously has fun with it all.

  • Anonymous

    Why is she listing to port? And is something wrong with her neck? Must have been the alleyway brawl.

  • Anonymous

    So basically, Patricia Bateman.

    • http://beautyforrealgirls.blogspot.com/ accidental housewife

      Hahahahaha!

  • http://blue-again.myopenid.com/ blue

    The outfit wouldn’t be that bad with a different blouse. It’s giving me hives!

  • Anonymous

    I’m more concerned about what’s going on with that hair.

  • Anonymous

    Why am I getting Edna from The Incredibles?

  • Anonymous

    dying laughing. 

  • Anonymous

    I’m speechless!
    I hope she reads your blog ;-)

  • Anonymous

    Emu Phillips.

    • Anonymous

      haha – Typo made myself laugh! 

  • Anonymous

    With the ill-fitting suit, the clutch carried like a bible, the severe bangs,and the hooker shoes, it looks like she’s trying to channel both Anthony Hopkins and Kathleen Turner in Crimes of Passion.

  • MilaXX

    I actually think this outfit works. Love the shoes.

  • MilaXX

    Chloe never strikes me as high or stone and certainly never as crazy out of her head or dirty as Paz.

    • Anonymous

      It’s not Chloe; it’s Lizbeth, the character she’s playing.

  • Anonymous

    Chloe totally looks like a dude in that second pic, and not an attractive one at that……

  • Judy_J

    Love the sunglasses.

  • Anonymous

    My story was going to be about David Byrne and breaking up with the Talking Heads, but your story’s has so much more color!

  • Anonymous

    Hahaha, so funny.  You should make this a weekly event.

  • Anonymous

    Hilarious, all the way around. So far she’s been ID’d as:

    Lizbeth, the ’80s lawyer
    David Byrne
    Emo Phillips (or, Emu)
    Edna from The Incredibles
    Patricia Bateman
    Roy Orbison
    Linda Hunt
    Johnny-Depp-as-Willy-Wonka
    Robert Downey, Jr.
    Annie Hall
    Dorothy Michaels without the curls
    Jens Voigt 
    a mime
    Dorothy Gale, porno version
    Flashdance’s little sister
    post-gender raggedy Annie/Andy

    • Anonymous

      you forgot anthony hopkins and kathleen turner

      • Anonymous

        Oops, sorry. Edited.

  • Anonymous

    I want to play!

    I think she’s Elsa, who works at a pharmaceutical lab in Maryland as a technician, but who is really a scientist/spy for a former Soviet Bloc country/double agent, who is secretly working on stealing new drug therapies for restless leg syndrome for the Soviet Bloc country in exchange for secret recording technology placed in eyeglasses/sunglasses that record everything a person wearing them sees for the US.  By day she is very serious and clinical, buttoned up tight, the very essence of a professional, but by night she lets her hair down in the dark S&M clubs of Washington DC, where she wields her well-honed dominitrix skills on fat lobbyists and smarmy senators.  She wears her dominitrix gear under her severe, baggy pantsuits, keeps her whip in the trunk of her car and the shoes take her from daytime to night with ease.

  • Anonymous

    Honey, give it up. 

    I don’t even enjoy it anymore. 

  • Anonymous

    i posted earlier that chloe actually is involved in performance art and made an art film recently.  since then i found the article in art in america magazine’s june 2011 issue (accessible on line).  as opposed to drunk, drugged, or psychotic, i think she actually is into fashion as performance art.  for me it’s a spectator sport.  

  • oohsparkley!

    I love that little parade she is in, marching to her own beat.

  • Anonymous

    Lady lawyers in the 1980s didn’t wear pants. That wasn’t acceptable until the 90s.

  • Anonymous

    How this woman was named any decade’s “it girl” is beyond me.  She’s a risk taker without the filter of tastefulness.

    • Anonymous

      That is IT. Thank you. 

  • Anonymous

    I want to be her friend.

  • Anonymous

    She looks great.  Those actually look like real men’s trousers.

    • Anonymous

      Except she doesn’t have the package to keep the crotch from being droopy.

      • Anonymous

        But it sort of looks like she does in photo #1. 
        No excuse for that bad fit; even men (those who can afford to, anyway) have their slacks tailored.

  • Jesse Ataide

    I see a more stylish Fran Lebowitz.  LOVE.

  • Anonymous

    Epic backstory, you guys!

    I actually think she looks pretty cute here!  Maybe I need to go lie down…

  • http://www.memoriesofthefuture.wordpress.com Jesse

    I see a more stylish Fran Lebowitz.  LOVE.

  • http://twitter.com/LianaBrooks Liana Brooks

    Have you seen TOOTSIE? That’s Tootsie make-up. #scarednow

  • http://twitter.com/MissAmynae Amy Putnam Ellinger

    glanced at the thumbnail and thought “Anna Wintour’s having a WTF 80′s moment”

  • http://twitter.com/MissAmynae Amy Putnam Ellinger

    glanced at the thumbnail and thought “Anna Wintour’s having a WTF 80′s moment”

  • Anonymous

    but she’s doing all of that as allee willis.

  • Anonymous

    That’s Lizbeth pronounced “Leezbeth”

  • Anonymous

    Those are not your sunglasses. The suit is cool though. 

  • Anonymous

    There are very few celebrities on my irrationally dislike list  - she makes the cut.

  • http://asskickingadviser.com/ Ass Kicking Adviser

    I dunno. I like it. I like that fact that despite the fact that Chloe’s career has marched forward and despite the fact that she ages like the rest of us, she is still that ‘it’ girl from Vogue 20 years ago who has her own very unique sense of style. When she starts showing up in Marchesa dresses, orange spray-tans, spaghetti arms and over-whitened teeth, THAT’s when I’ll be upset.

  • Anonymous

    Your Chloe posts are THE BEST! Ever. 

    • Jason Kramer

      YES!! I was just going to say the same thing! Hands-down, my favorite posts!!

  • Anonymous

    The waistline of the trousers and the waistline of the jacket are at war, creating a sloppy blouse peek-a-boo. 
    Love the gorgeous blouse.
    Hate the hair, glasses, bag, and slacks. I know it’s a menswear look, but the crotch is so baggy I can’t not see a penis in the first shot. 
    Mostly, I hate her tilt.
    I love your posts about her.

  • http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=lf UltimaEsperenza

    Luv hur.

  • Lisa

    She is bananas, man.

  • Anonymous

    I think she looks kinda great.  The hair is Not So Good, but mine own is in a questionable phase, so I can’t cast aspersions!  Love the shirt, suit, shoes, clutch, sunnies.

  • http://profiles.google.com/thisiscelia Celia

    And yet managing to look so smug while looking so shitty. Bravo.

  • Susan Crawford

    “I’m Chloe Sevigny, and it has come to my attention that . . . I love red hooker shoes and a buttoned up retro shirt.”

  • Anonymous

    You’re all wrong, TLo. If it was the ’80s, the shoulders would be WAAAAAY bigger.

  • Anonymous

    LOVE THIS LOOK.

  • Anonymous

    I am getting a Victor Victoria vibe.

  • http://karensbooksandchocolate.blogspot.com/ Karenlibrarian

    The outfit is insane but I LOVE your back story.  You WERQ that imaginative shit, girls!

    • Anonymous

      I know, right?

      TLo should write a gay Jackie Collins-esque pulp novel.  Couldn’t stop laughing and soo spot on.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

    For Chloe, this is a step up.  Bit too heavy on the pale foundation though.  I can at least appreciate celebrities who know they can’t dress and just go with it.  

  • Anonymous

    My first thought was “What did Johnny Weir do to his hair?!”  :-)

  • Anonymous

    Oh honey . . .

  • Anonymous

    I was thinking she looked like Edna from “The Incredibles”

  • Anonymous

    She looks like a man in the second picture….or one of my grandmother’s sisters. 

    Who also looked a lot like men. 

  • Anonymous

    OK, her hair needs help, but except for her pants being too short for those heels, I like her outfit! But I guess I’m alone here.

  • Anonymous

    I know this is wrong – but I really really want those glasses.  I could get away with those glasses.  Keep the rest of it, ESPECIALLY THOSE ILL FITTING PANTS.

  • Anonymous

    I would happily read an entire book of Chloe posts, if you guys wrote them. It’d be like playing with paper dolls again.

  • Anonymous

    I get a “Michael Caine as the trans killer in Dressed to Kill” vibe here…very scary.

  • 544948446
  • Anonymous

    Totally wack, including the “I’m psychotic despite being medicated” look. Someone that I would definitely avoid making eye contact with.