Ashley Tisdale’s Jazz Hands

Posted on December 19, 2011

Ashley Tisdale wants you to know she’s bad. Really, really bad. Shamone.

This will be exhibit A in our defense the next time someone claims we’re too mean to celebrities on the street and can’t they just run their errands and live their lives without bitches like us picking apart their every move? If that isn’t an outfit designed to get her picture taken, then we’re Marie of Romania’s bitchy gay friends.

 

So congrats, Ashley. You done got your picture taken. Mission Accomplished. Grab your crotch and do a twirl to celebrate. But we have to say, the outfit’s not grabbing us and the obvious camera-whoring is a turnoff (learn from your betters how to make it look spontaneous and even a little personally annoying). So now that we’ve given you 30 seconds of the spotlight, we’d like to talk about your purse. You can go now.

Céline Tote Bag

 

Gorge, no? Especially in the green. She should have gone with that instead of the all-black, look-at-my-hands ensemble she’s sporting. We realize, however. that not everyone would love those wings on the side, so we put it to you, gentleminions:

The Céline Tote Bag: YEA or NAY?

 

 

[Photo Credit: PacificCoastNews, celine.com]

    • Anonymous

      YEA. The ‘wings’ make it look more interestng that its basic rectangular shape would have been otherwise.

      • Anonymous

        100% agreed. YEA.

    • Sobaika Mirza

      Not digging the wings, but it the bag is quite luxe.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_GFMOZFM3WT3T56EZHVZFK7UXSI Ramon

      I hate the branding on those gloves with the passion of a hot thousand suns (It’s the holidays, they bring the worst in me).

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_GFMOZFM3WT3T56EZHVZFK7UXSI Ramon

      I hate the branding on those gloves with the passion of a hot thousand suns (It’s the holidays, they bring the worst in me).

      • Anonymous

        Maybe that’s why she didn’t go for the green, so that she wouldn’t look too Xmas-y with red AND green accessories.

        • Anonymous

          Ho ho ho

      • Anonymous

        Word.  So tacky.

      • Anonymous

        There is no good aspect to those things- branding, color and design are atrocious.

    • Anonymous

      Total Yea!

      Did she ride a motorcycle? I’m confused.

    • Anonymous

      Total Yea!

      Did she ride a motorcycle? I’m confused.

    • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

      She could fit inside that bag. And no, Ashley, that is not a compliment!

    • http://twitter.com/almcafee Alison McAfee

      yea!! and mustard yellow for me. love that bag.

    • Anonymous

      I kind of like the green and black version, but it also kind of looks like a little robot with its tongue hanging out and big ears. I can’t not see it.

      • http://twitter.com/JoStrickland Charlotte Fabricius

        Oh my god, I actually really liked this bag, despite an urge to tuck in the side-flap-things, but now I cannot unsee the face.

      • Anonymous

        right? looks a bit like a cyberman to me.

      • Anonymous

        right? looks a bit like a cyberman to me.

      • RyzandShyn

        Giggling like a fool after taking a second look at the bag and instantly spotting the little robot. Can’t not see it now too.

      • http://onebluetree.blogspot.com/ Sara L.

        Yup, that’s the first thing I saw. “Oh, look, a starlet carrying a bag with a face on it.” I thought it was funny that the bag is being described as “luxe” when lolling-tongue-face is all I see.

      • Anonymous

        Hmm. You’ve killed any chance I might seriously want this bag with that vision. Thank-you.

      • Anonymous

        Great.  Now it’s making me all anxious and haunty feeling.  Now I’m going to scrutinize all of the other handbags in my closet.  And then lock the closet door.  Tight. 

    • Anonymous

      Yea! Yay!

    • http://twitter.com/herong Heron

      SHAMONE!!!  

      She should have started with the man in the mirror.  And asked him to make a change.  

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F73LIJ3SJGI5AJQMXMWXCKILHI Pamela

      I like big bags and I cannot lie-big ol’ YEA!

    • http://opinionandamovie.blogspot.com/ Deitra S.

      Yea on the green, Nay on the wings.  Double nay on the jazz hands and camera whoring.  Double yea for “shamone.” :)

    • BuffaloBarbara

      Meh.  Bag’s a bag.  Not horrible, not great.  It looks like it holds her crap as needed.   I agree with serenitynow02 about the robot face, though.I don’t really get the gloves.  Is Chanel paying her to advertise to the  High School Musical generation? Or did she just really like their logo and buy something she found on etsy where it got attached to gauntlet gloves?

    • http://twitter.com/MissAmynae Amy Putnam Ellinger

      the bag is pretty, but the “meh” face on it is creeping me out. 

      “Celine bag does not approve of your attire. go change or Celine bag will eat you.”

      • Judy_J

        I see the face, too!

    • Anonymous

      Are those red checked Chanel bike gloves?  WTF?  Dear Chanel.  Please stop.  Stupid people will wear anything you put your logo on.  Stop the madness!  Won’t you please think of the children?  (And OMG, I just went to the Chanel site to find these, and the things they have listed under Accessories/Sport are just frightening.  Who wants a Chanel surfboard?!

    • Anonymous

      No, you misunderstand. She’s LARPing as Uncle Karl!

      That is one gorgeous, bazillion dollar bag.

    • Christina Brennan

      Definition of fashion victim.  As for the handbag, IN.

    • Anonymous

      Yea on the bag.  I would make it my bitch.

    • Anonymous

      I’m figuring that when she’s done doing whatever she’s doing, she folds up, puts herself in the bag, and then someone throws her in the back seat and drives her home.

      • Anonymous

        Like Flat Stanley!!

        • Anonymous

          I live for the day that some young relative sends me a Flat Stanley. I do hope it happens while I’m still agile enough to take that boy for the full tour!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1326120071 Gaby Ripoll

      I don’t like the wings because it looks like an invitation for a mugger to reach into one’s purse (what’s the closure like, is what I want to know), but I’m a commuter in NYC, so maybe my concerns are different from (a) people in LA (b) who can afford such things.

    • Anonymous

      Yum on the tote, though it is huge.
      What the hell are those odd checkered picnic tablecloth gloves from Chanel?

    • Anonymous

      J’Adore

    • Anonymous

      honestly, the wings look better in practice than in pictures…  it ends up having an up top shape that is evocative of a berkin rather than an oddly-shaped-just-to-be-oddly-shaped accessory.

    • W A

      Today you managed a Dylan Thomas, Frank O’Hara, and Dorothy Parker allusion!

    • Anonymous

      I’d like it if it were wider and less deep  I hate digging 2 feet down to find anything!

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3AJ237ND3GAHDQJZ4TLCO4WLRA Emily

      Yea.  Love the bag!

    • http://heartprintandstyle.blogspot.com Vivi N

      I’ve seen this purse popping up on some style blogs I follow. I understand that the ‘wings’ give it some interest and gives the bag more space, but I just can’t get into it. At all. 

    • http://heartprintandstyle.blogspot.com Vivi N

      I’ve seen this purse popping up on some style blogs I follow. I understand that the ‘wings’ give it some interest and gives the bag more space, but I just can’t get into it. At all. 

    • Anonymous

      Yea. Love.

    • Anonymous

      Who is she?

      • http://twitter.com/anywhoo Leigh David

        One of the “stars” of High School Musical who failed to grasp the Highlander truth of break outs from cultural phenomenons,  “There can be only one.” 

    • Anonymous

      Looks like a golf bag, no, BOWLING bag, to me…..

    • Anonymous

      Methinks they were channeling a bowling bag when they designed this purse.

      • Anonymous

        Methinks you ‘n’ I were wethinking on the same wavelength.

    • Anonymous

      I do like this.  Either the black or green.  The wing are what give it the interest.

    • Anonymous

      i love that those silly gingham chanel gloves cover just about none of her hands. not really.
      purse is nice, wish i could afford it. really. chalk me up as another one who doesnt know who she is. i could look her up [i'm sure again] but i’m tired.

    • Joyce VG

      Yea and yum!

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QCJEZMOV4VYMXC5WJALLZNYEB4 Mari Rose

      With the Michael-Jackson-inspired gloves and Prince-Charles-gritting-his-teeth bag, fashion claims another victim.

    • Sara__B

      NAY. The leather looks wonderfully thick and soft, but I’m not a fan of the big size, the side wings, or the unintentional face. It’s not worth the big bucks it undoubtedly costs.

      • http://twitter.com/delysia_lafosse Delysia LaFosse

        Yeah, it’s a pretty disgruntled face, too.

    • Diana Martinez

      I like color in a bag, but that bag looks better in all black.  The green and black just looks odd with the wings and all….   She looks like a moron, though.  Those gloves are hideous. 

    • Cheri Lee

      The green is fucking fabulous.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_OSYAJATXUH3QX7ZDDF52GXG4PU Janie R

      She looks like someone who has too much stuff, and wears it all.

    • http://twitter.com/MandySCG MandyJane

      Love the bag, hate the gloves!

    • Anonymous

      Nay. I hate the label front and center. 

    • aimee_parrott

      YAY on the bag.  J’adore the green!

      Oh and this:
      “…we’re Marie of Romania’s bitchy gay friends”

      make me love you both even more, which I didn’t think was possible.  A good Dorothy Parker reference makes me swoon.

    • Anonymous

      YAY!

    • Anonymous

      I can’t stop seeing the face on the bag going :L

    • http://asskickingadviser.com/ Ass Kicking Adviser

      Wings are for maxi-pads.

    • MilaXX

      That bag? Hells yea! I would even have given Ashley a break if she lost the red gloves, swapped the red shoes for green or a dark gray & carried the bag in the green/black combo.

    • Anonymous

      S’alright.  Better in the green.  I don’t covet it, so that’ll be nay.

    • Anonymous

      Gorge, no?

      Actually, no, it’s not.  In fact, it’s one of the ugliest handbags I’ve ever seen. 

    • Anonymous

      I love that bag. 

    • Anonymous

      I love Ashley AND the bag. Actually. Ashley more than the bag. It’s a fun outfit. The shoes are killah. The gloves are silly but she’s young enough to do silly. I like it.
      Love the thick soft-looking leather of the bag, but the wings are meh. Seems like it’d always get caught on things. 

    • http://victoriapavlova.com Victoria Pavlova

      I so want this bag. It’s like two to three times outside my range, but I love it. Prefer in tan color though.

      Those gloves ought to be burned.

    • Anonymous

      Celine bag in green: YEA! I would wear the shit out of that.

    • Anonymous

      NAY. Why is it looking at me, its mouth pursed and upset? (ha! see what I did there?)

      • Anonymous

        That’s the first thing I noticed too! And with a little bit of drool to boot… ;)

    • CQAussie

      ADORE.  And definitely better in the green.

    • Anonymous

      Yea. But only in the green.

    • Anonymous

      Only if I want to take a week’s worth of office work with me.  that thing is huge.

    • Anonymous

      I own this very bag. The wings can buckle in.  It’s a great looking bag, but hella heavy.  I’ve had a crick in my neck since October.

    • Anonymous

      The bag’s a yea, it’s beautiful.  And the reason she’s sporting the black one is because that’s the one she got for free.

    • Anonymous

      YEA but only for the green. The black one just looks like a drawstring bag that lost the string.

    • Lisa

      YEA for the tote!  And actually, I do very much like everything else she has on, until you get to the stupid sparkle gloves!  Just because it’s Chanel doesn’t make it okay.

    • R. L.

      Yes!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000162643124 Jennifer Schulte

      I think it looks like a cartoon teapot and zippered S&M mask got together and made that bag.

    • Anonymous

      Love the bag in green and black.. her, not so much and those gloves are ghastly.

    • Anonymous

      NAY, I’m not a fan of these huge, oversized bags that celebrities seem to love. I do love the rest of her look, except for the gloves – if they were a solid color with no logo, then yes, but as is, noooo.

    • Anonymous

      YEA. The wings look like ears for the ‘face’ the zipper and handles make! The face tote!

    • http://twitter.com/chelwi Christine

      I have this very strong urge to push the “wings” in. It’s really bothering, but I do think the green is a gorgeous color.

    • Anonymous

      What is up with the bobble heads carrying the big bags? These skinny little girls like to carry bags that probably weigh at least 20% of their own body weight. What can they possibly have in a bag this large (hint – it isn’t food)?

    • Anonymous

      YEA!  Without the wings, the little monster would be missing his ears!  :D

      Seriously, first thing I saw was a face.  I love this.

    • Anonymous

      Ashley Tisdale is quite possibly the hottest girl on earth. Oh, the things I’d do to her…

    • Ruth Gottesman

      Love the bag. Sophisticated and the shape keeps it from being boring.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Renee-Rohrer-Bomar/100002942684824 Renee Rohrer Bomar

      I just want to know why Ashley is wearing Joan’s little gold pencil necklace???

    • Anonymous

      Egad. Nay.

    • http://summerborn.livejournal.com/ Summer Born

      YAY. If you’re going to go for a tote, this is an absolutely divine one. And it looks practical (as far as these things go). A++

    • http://vhanna26.typepad.com Vera

      Totally yea!

    • http://twitter.com/taijuuuh Taija HU!

      I think the wings just look like the sides of the bag have collapsed from heavy usage :/

    • Anonymous

      I see a Koolaid pitcher!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

      NAY.  I don’t like that the sides protrude out, it looks sloppy. How amazing would it be without that?  With or without the bag, she looks utterly ridiculous. 

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ZCDF76GHVHUZPV444PXC3Z6P3Y Jie Ying

      everytime i see this bag i think, FACE!!it creeps me out.

    • Jessica Rowe

      I do like the bag, but it looks rather inviting for thievery.

    • Anonymous

      I have just the place for that bag.. under my tree!!

    • http://profiles.google.com/anplica Anplica Fiore

      Yea to the bag – esp. in the green.  Love the curving detail!

    • Cathy S

      It’s okay. I prefer the Michael Jackson references. Shamone.

    • bethannstamps

      HATE the wings. hate big oversized,” let me stay the night cuz i’ve got two whole outfits plus my toothbrush with me just in case” bags.  honestly how much stuff do you need to carry that you need to haul a suitcase everywhere you go?

    • Anonymous

      A Parker reference while mocking shameless attention-whoring?? Two of my favorite things, together again!

      Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,A medley of extemporanea; And love is a thing that can never go wrong; And I am Marie of Romania. — Dorothy Parker, “Comment”

      (Glad to see you boys are friends of Dorothy in more ways than one!)

      PS: Hate the wings. Love the green.

    • http://twitter.com/commish24 commish24

      Would love that purse without the wings. Not so sure about them with.

    • Anonymous

      yea, yea, a thousand times yea to the bag in green (though I think I’d push the sides in).

    • Merridith Kristoffersen

      YEA YEA YEA!

    • Anonymous

      NAY to the bag for practicality reasons. Can’t get on the subway with that bag, unless arguing with strangers who you keep stabbing with your purse is your ‘thing’.

    • Anonymous

      I can’t un-see the Hawaiian Punch punchbowl dude on the front of that bag.  

      • Anonymous

        HEY KOOL-AID!

        • Anonymous

          My bad! Kool Aid. The Kool Aid pitcher dude.

    • Anonymous

      Nay, due to the wings.

      Also: “then we’re Marie of Romania’s bitchy gay friends.”

      You guys crack me up!

    • Samantha Irene

      The bag is great! Much better in the mixed colorway than the black – love the wings!

    • Anonymous

      the green bag is gorgeous but i bet it’s really heavy.  makes my back hurt just to look at it.

    • Anonymous

      I love a green bag. Yay. Also love odd gloves. Actually, I like the whole look.

    • Anonymous

      Nay. Not, I hasten to add, that I’d turn it down or fail to use it should one appear on my doorstep (especially the green). But it’s not the wings, per se.

      For the kind of money this purse costs & for the years of wear I’d get out of it, it has too many things going on, yet it’s not blatantly about them going on. I mean, it’s not a purse featuring some extravagantly flamboyant design feature(s). It’s a busy, busy, bag trying to pass as a simple & unassumingly perfect bag. Too busy for me. I’d get rid of the very prominent zipper on the side pocket.  Then it’d be o.k. 

    • Anonymous

      P.s. The intent (or is that import?) of the original quotation aside, I say that if you want to be Marie of Romania’s bitch gay friends, then you damn well are. So mote it be.

    • Anonymous

      Don’t care about the bag.  LOVE THOSE SHOES!

    • bloodshothalfblind

      as a bagwhore, all i can say is – WANT!!!!!

    • Anonymous

      Love the bag…but it does look like the Kool Aid man.