There’s almost no point in playing Pretend Stylist with the latest sandals, you guys. You know why? Because stylists and starlets are notoriously gun shy when it comes to shoes and subsequently, the red carpets of the world are trod upon by an endless parade of nude pumps or black peeptoes.
But you can’t play Pretend Stylist without pretending, so to hell with those red carpet wusses. We’re just going to assign shoes and those damn celebrities can just suck it up. Have fun with it, we say. For your own picks, think of using heads of state or porn stars instead of singers, actresses and models. Old monarchs of Europe! Characters from Shakespeare! You and all your friends! Famous criminals! Famous courtesans! The point is to assign a shoe to someone. Grab a pencil and paper, some twine, safety scissors, clothespins, and glitter. Preheat oven to 325.
3.1 Philip Lim, Alexander Wang, Altuzarra, Aperlaï, Balenciaga, Bottega Veneta
Selena Gomez, January Jones, J Lo, Chloe Moretz, Rihanna, Eva Mendes.
Brian Atwood, Burak Uyan, Camilla Skovgaard, Casadei, Charlotte Olympia, Chelsea Paris
Hailee Steinfeld, Reese Witherspoon, Michelle Williams, Amanda Seyfried, Kerry Washington, Marisa Tomei.
Christie Morris, Christian Dior, Christian Louboutin, Diego Dolcini (4, 5), Dries Van Noten
Elizabeth Olson, Sarah Jessica Parker, Gwyneth Paltrow, Viola Davis, Uma Thurman, Michelle Obama.
Edmundo Castillo, Emilio Pucci, Fendi (3, 4), Giambattista Valli, Gianvito Rossi
Dianna Agron, Kristen Stewart, Paz de la Huerta, Jennifer Aniston, Angelina Jolie, Freida Pinto.
Gio Diev, Giuseppe Zanotti (2, 3), Jerome C. Rousseau, Jimmy Choo, Loeffler Randall
Fergie, Blake Lively, Anne Hathaway, Taylor Swift, Cate Blanchett, Emma Stone.
Manolo Blahnik (1, 2), Marni, Michael Kors, Missoni, Nicholas Kirkwood
Heidi Klum, Jessica Biel, Julia Roberts, Jennifer Hudson, Katy Perry, Carey Mulligan.
Oscar de la Renta, Pierre Hardy, Pollini, Prada (4,5), Rag & Bone
Maggie Gyllenhaal, Kate Winslet, Miley Cyrus, Iman, Helen Mirren, Zoe Saldana.
René Caovilla, Roberto Cavalli, Roger Vivier, Ruper Sanderson, Salvatore Ferragamo, Sergio Rossi
Christina Aguilera, Cher, Christina Hendricks, Rosie Huntington-Whitely, Olivia Wilde, Charlize Theron.
Sigerson Morrison, Tabitha Simmons, Tory Burch, Versace, Viktor & Rolf, Zoraide
Keira Knightley, Zooey Deschanel, Felicity Jones, Halle Berry, Evan Rachel Wood, Kelly Osborne.
[Photo Credit: style.com]