Jennifer Lopez for Glamour Magazine

Posted on November 17, 2011

As a mother, a person, and an entertainer, J Lo covers the latest issue of Glamour after having staged a robbery on a jewelry store, apparently.

 

Jennifer Lopez for Glamour Magazine

Jennifer Lopez covers the December 2011 issue of Glamour magazine photographed by Matthias Vriens-McGrath and styled by Melissa Ventosa.

Bustier, Chloe Sevigny for Opening Ceremony; Pants and Swarovski-crystal anchor necklace, Salvatore Ferragamo; Gold necklace, Michael Kors; Bracelets, Verdura, Chanel Fine Jewelry, Lorraine Schwartz, Pomellato.

 

Inside the magazine, she continues wearing tight skirts and too much jewelry while advising us all on the makings of a strong relationship.

Jennifer Lopez for Glamour MagazineBandeau top, Swarovski crystal necklace, both Salvatore Ferragamo necklace; Tank, Enza Costa; Skirt, Chris Benz; Gold necklace, Michael Kors; Bracelets, Verdura, Chanel Fine Jewelry, Lorraine Schwartz, Pomellato.

 

On what she’s learned about love and relationships:
“I think I’ve finally learned the biggest lesson of all. You’ve got to love yourself first. You’ve got to be OK on your own before you can be OK with somebody else. You’ve got to value yourself and know that you’re worth everything. And until you value yourself enough and love yourself enough to know that, you can’t really have a healthy relationship.”

“Got to love yourself first.” Okay, we’re writing that down, J Lo. Very smart advice! We’ve never heard such unique thoughts before! Apparently, she was suffering from lack of self-love and that’s why her marriages failed. This will come as news to anyone with functioning sensory organs and a working brain.

When she’s not saving the world with her relationship advice, the girl can rock a high-waisted skirt, we have to admit. Now if only she can deal with her crippling lack of self-love.

 

[Photo Credit: Matthias Vriens-McGrath for glamour.com]

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  • Anonymous

    You know, just once, I’d love for a celebrity featured in a magazine to say, “You know what? I don’t have a clue why some relationships work and some don’t. And neither does anyone else.”

    • Anonymous

      No kidding! That would be so refreshing.  Either that or the first one with enough courage to say, “We got tired of each other in bed and decided to move on.”

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3JSTXMWWVZN2QNP2UEKJMTWD7U Isabel

        Probably the bed issue. If you’ve had too many, you will get bored with just one. That’s why Clooney will probably not get married.

        • Anonymous

          I dunno about that…I present Warren Beatty as a counterexample.

          • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_GFMOZFM3WT3T56EZHVZFK7UXSI Ramon

            But he might not have ended with the lovely Miss Bening if he had not been scared into domesticity by Madonna.

    • Anonymous

      Yes. This.

  • Sobaika Mirza

    She’s sort of become a caricature of herself. Even still, I think she’s an uncommonly beautiful woman.

    • Anonymous

      I agree. She’s stunning. It’s a shame she takes herself so seriously, though. It’s a really unattractive quality.

  • Anonymous

    Apparently she robbed a very tacky jewelry store.

    • Maria Rosenfire

      It’s sort of like Claire’s and a BDSM shop violently collided.

  • http://twitter.com/mishfactorial Michelle Le

    that “bra over work clothes” look definitely belongs to someone who doesn’t love themselves enough.

    • Anonymous

      yes, that is weird.  Not a classy look.  Not that I expected one, but that is just weird and tacky.  Not just regular tacky.

  • Anonymous

    Now that her self-love quotient is back to high, I hope she doesn’t end up breaking up with herself. How awkward that would be.

    • oohsparkley!

      You made me laugh!

  • J Dreesen

    “As a mother, a person, and an entertainer,…”
    BAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAaaa…that never gets old!

  • Anonymous

    Why is it that people dish out relationship advice after their relationship fails? All it proves is that they now know what doesn’t work, not what does.

    Back to fashion, please no dear god, please don’t let the navy blue/scarlet combo come back! We are all going to look like stewardesses – yes, air hostesses, not flight attendants – again!

    • Anonymous

      “I learned from my mistakes. Not in time to save the actual relationship, but just in time to have a catharsis before my big cover shoot.”

  • Anonymous

    When you suffer from a lack of self-love, the best prescription is to perform the old press and lift with one’s arms, and voila!  You got yourself a major injection of boob esteem.

    • Anonymous

      Precisely!

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3JSTXMWWVZN2QNP2UEKJMTWD7U Isabel

      And you get another man, quickly! Don’t take time to analyze what went wrong in your previous relationship.

  • Anonymous

    Oh my gosh, so THAT’s what it was. I thought it was because she accidentally exposed Marc Anthony to daylight one morning and he instantly turned into a pile of ash. As for the clothes, I’m just too worried she’s going to put her eye out with that anchor to properly enjoy all the tight boobiness.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mariyn-Reineman/100000579215474 Mariyn Reineman

    Does she need money?  I have seen her on more commercials in the last week than in the last 10 years.  Her commercials for different products are shown right after one another.  I think she has been completely overexposed on television in about 4 days.  And the comercials don’t stop!  To me it is a riot for her to pitch the smallest nerd-looking car (Fiat) with a straight face.  Really!!!  

    • http://twitter.com/asciident Melissa Della

      I’m not an expert, but I think generally part of the “post-breakup” Hollywood routine is to throw themselves into work to move on and convince the public they’re still hot. I’m expecting at least 3 commercials featuring Demi Moore any day now.

      • http://beautyforrealgirls.blogspot.com/ accidental housewife

        Nooooo! I can deal with Jennifer. She’s kind of ridiculous, but she doesn’t bug me. Demi on the other hand – Seeing her even while I fast forward through the commercials will give me a rash.

        • Anonymous

          Then you’re going to want to avoid Ann Taylor for a while.

          • http://beautyforrealgirls.blogspot.com/ accidental housewife

            Thank you for the heads up.

            Seriously, just the sight of Demi Moore makes me irrationally annoyed.

  • Anonymous

    I grown to hates her. Really so so so much worse than Paltrow. JLO is totally full of it. At least paltrow doesn’t trot her kids out to improve her image. What  a real self-absorbed advice giving do-do. 

  • scottyf

    What Jennifer Lopez said

    “I think I’ve finally learned the biggest lesson of all. You’ve got to love yourself first. You’ve got to be OK on your own before you can be OK with somebody else. You’ve got to value yourself and know that you’re worth everything. And until you value yourself enough and love yourself enough to know that, you can’t really have a healthy relationship.”

    What Jennifer Lopez REALLY meant:

    “I think I’ve finally learned the biggest lesson of all. You’ve THEY’VE got to love yourself ME first. …You’ve THEY’VE got to value yourself  ME and know that you’re I’M worth everything. And until you value yourself ME enough and love yourself ME enough to know that, you WE can’t really have a healthy relationship.”

    • Anonymous

      Love, not like.

    • Anonymous

      Brilliant.

  • Valerie Little

    Sorry, but I’ve never been down with her being crowned “the most beautiful woman on the planet” or whatever it was she was crowned. What she has is an amazing makeup artist. And gorgeous teeth.  

    • Anonymous

      What she said.  Like X100

  • http://twitter.com/chelwi Christine

    At least both outfits are cute on her. But I’m disturbed by that second picture. Not sure if it’s how she’s holding her arm or photoshopping, but her left boob has disappeared.

    • http://profiles.google.com/katelynsypher Katie Sypher

      I agree that the second picture had some work done to it. I’m not saying she’s big or denying the slimming power of the high-waisted skirt, but they definitely shaved a healthy amount off her waist.

      Also, this is weird, but: doesn’t her right boob kind of look like a light bulb?

      • Anonymous

        And her left arm !?!? It’s wavy.

      • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

        Horizontal lightbulb! Hahaaha!!!!

      • Anonymous

        Yes. Look at the upper curve of her ass (can I say that?) appearing behind her left hand. There is no way that can connect with that waist -unless she’s made from pieces of other people/dolls, which I’m starting to believe. 

  • Anonymous

    As a person, a woman, and a minion, I find your commentary right on the money.

  • Anonymous

    Why is she dressed like SlutSandy from Grease for a magazine cover? Is she angling for a part in a revival or something? I don’t think she has the range.

  • Anonymous

    What on earth is going on in that second photo? Her left boob looks like it’s trying to escape the frame and is only being held on there with some twine!

  • Anonymous

    Jennifer is exploring Cougarville.   I’m sure she’s having fun, but it’s not attractive to watch.

    Well, maybe men enjoy it.

  • Anonymous

    Call me cynical, but somehow I doubt the issue has been that she didn’t love herself *enough*.

    –GothamTomato

  • Anonymous

    That’s what her problem was with her marriage, she didn’t say: “As A WIFE, a mother, a person, and an entertainer”….. Poor Anthony couldn’t take it and moved on….. 

  • BerlinerNYC

    That second picture cracks me up. It reminds me of last night’s Happy Endings, where the one woman was so bad at flirting, and she always somehow ended up with her fingers in her mouth. J-Lo’s pretty much there.

  • Anonymous

    Looks like she robbed the ugly-jewelry counter at a Goodwill to me.

    And I had NO idea the poor cow didn’t LOVE HERSELF enough already.  Poor, poor Jennifer.

  • Anonymous

    She’s beautiful, sure, and she mostly looks good here except for all the freaking jewelry but I don’t get her appeal anymore. It’s going to be somewhat interesting to see how she’s going to keep trying to make herself seem relevant as the years continue to tick by.

  • Anonymous

    Heave ‘ho! The H.M.S JLo is in full sails and bling once more!

  • http://twitter.com/figgidaboudit Figgy

    At least she’s smiling. I’ve gotten so sick of her showing up in *every* picture doing that stupid sucked-in-cheeks “sexy” look where she just ends up looking constipated.

  • MilaXX

    LOL, Sure it’s way too much jewelry and too much cleavage, but it’s pure Jlo. If that’s the image she wants to rock, so be it.

  • http://twitter.com/susanpcollier Susan Collier

    All I can see in that second photo is Paula Abdul.

  • Anonymous

    What the hell is Skype sex? If it’s what I think it is, it seems like a pretty bad idea.

  • http://www.facebook.com/fiddlecub Kevin VanOrd

    I’m sensing a distinct disconnect between the title of this magazine and the celebrity on its cover.

  • http://twitter.com/jlinl Jennifer LeMesurier

    I love how T&Lo have been together longer than either her and Mark Anthony or Ashton and Demi… or just about any other Hollywood marriage. 

  • Anonymous

    Oh, honey, they totally photoshopped your hips for the cover!!

  • Anonymous

    she does look good in these shots :)

  • Anonymous

    Luv Huh.  

  • Anonymous

    HA!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/samuel.j.donovan Samuel Joesph Donovan

    WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH HER LEFT BREAST IN THE SECOND PHOTO?

  • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

    Is it just me, or does the bandeau part of that top look like its photoshopped into position there?  WEIRD.  And she just makes me tired.  Honey, the energy you expend in trying to convince both yourself and us that you are uber-hot, could easily power a small municipality, like NYC.

  • Anonymous

    As a mother, a person, and an entertainer…That will never NOT be hilarious to me. Even funnier? Poor Jen just didn’t have enough self-love. Yes, THAT has been your problem all along, Jen: humility and altruism.

  • http://twitter.com/jaythenerdkid Aaminah Khan

    Is it bad that I really and truly love her to bits?

    • Anonymous

      Oooh, I;m sorry but as a human, person and homo sapien, I’d have to say yes. Yes, it is.

      • http://twitter.com/jaythenerdkid Aaminah Khan

        But she’s so divatastic! I find her equal parts hilarious, fierce and endearingly over-the-top.

        Plus “On the Floor” is one of my favourite club songs. :P

  • Anonymous

    Why is she wearing a bathing suit top over a tank top?  C’mon J.Lo, you have to love yourself in one top first before you can add another top.

  • Anonymous

    Ohhhhhhh…., it’s JLo.  And her publicists. In her next interview she/her publicist will hold forth on the importance of following your own path or marching to the tune of your own drummer, or a different drummer, or… Whatever.

    What struck my eye on that cover was this caption: ‘Tis the Season for Hookups, Proposals, and…Skype Sex?!

    Really?  Is that what ’tis the season?  And no, no, no–I’m not talking about putting the Christ back in Christmas or the war on Chrismas or any of that.  It’s just so vulgar, and that caption is so sleazy.  I know the mothers of teenaged girls will tell me I’m being stuffy and old-fashioned, but if that’s the case, so be it.

  • Anonymous

    Okay, after reading about JLo’s lack of self-love, I’ve got Whitney Houston’s “The Greatest Love of All” playing in my head! As far as this spread goes, I would expect nothing more from JLo, either in terms of her styling or thought processes.

    • Anonymous

      I think it is extremely generous and kindhearted of you to use the term “thought process” in reference to JLo.

  • Anonymous

    Did anyone else think she kinda looked like Beyonce in the thumbnail? I really think either could be interchanged here.

    • Anonymous

      I get poor man’s Anna Magnani from this shoot. And she will never be Anna Magnani.

  • M Carlson

    I love that second skirt/blouse combo on her. The jewelry kind of detracts from it.

  • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

    Tugboat!

  • Anonymous

    She’s right, though. If she had any self-love or self-respect, she would just stop talking.

     

  • aimee_parrott

    As a mother, a person and an entertainer… I am grateful to you for reminding me of that.  That will never *not* be funny!

    JLo’s done a really good job of hiding her crippling lack of self-love.

  • Anonymous

    Seems to me that JLo would benefit from a little less self-love.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_GQIN74TNNQROY5JFPOWWBGJWEM andy

    They Photoshopped that stupid bra onto her tank top, for some reason. Somebody forgot to bring the correct wardrobe to the shoot?

  • http://profiles.google.com/valencia.lucia87 Lucía Valencia

    Terrible photoshop job. Just look at her hand on hip on the second photo, there’s hip BEHIND her hand! And well, we all noticed the terrible bra they plastered on there. Geez.

  • oohsparkley!

    Ha Ha.  I think most Hollywood divorces are a result of too much self-love and not enough spouse love.

  • Anonymous

    This looks kinda Cosmo – tight, low cut, with an additional serving of cheese.

  • Anonymous

    Ugh…. I so loathe her.  Seriously, I would have way more respect for her if she just said “I marry handsome men who excite me and then I get bored and leave them.”
    And this is a case of before you leave the house, remove one peice of jewelry.  Or 10.

  • Anonymous

    “This will come as news to anyone with functioning sensory organs and a working brain.” Oh my HA HA!
    Make her go away now please? JLo the sequel is too much. The original was a snorefest.