Chloe Moretz in Dolce & Gabbana

Posted on November 22, 2011

Okay sweetie, listen up. Time for us to pretend we’re your kindly yet fabulous gay uncles again.

Chloe Moretz in Dolce & GabbanaChloe Moretz attends the premiere of “Hugo” premiere in New York City in a Dolce & Gabbana dress paired with Sergio Rossi shoes.

Chloe Moretz in Dolce & Gabbana

Chloe Moretz in Dolce & Gabbana

We have been, and will continue to be for a while longer, very supportive of your recent forms of experimentation on the red carpet. And of course we’re thrilled that such a fetal young lady as yourself has taken such an active interest in expressing herself through fashion and learning how to navigate that world. Baby bravos all around. We firmly believe that the very young- especially when they’re getting all manner of free merch thrown at them – should go from one extreme to another, trying out all the variations along the way. We feel that this is the time when you should be breaking rules and not worrying about whether you look hot, whether your clothes are going to make people like you (Protip: they won’t), or whether you’re wearing the “right” kind of clothes.

Having said all THAT…

You clearly wanted to be glamorously (and conventionally) dressed up for your movie premiere, which is absolutely the right way to go, but if you are going to wear the more expected kind of dress for these things, we think it best, as your pretend gay uncles, to advise you to stay away from colorless dresses and also from bigass bows. They will never be your friends.

Kiss kiss, darling.

 

[Photo Credit: Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images]

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  • http://www.facebook.com/charlotte.horseman Charlotte Horseman

    I kind of love this – it’s weird, but pretty.

  • http://twitter.com/sunnyd611 Laura Geyer

    it’s like the old southern saying, the bigger the bow, the bigger the ____. i can never understand the appeal of anyone older than 12 to wear a bow

    • Anonymous

      The bigger the what?? what?? I’m dying to know!! (Never having heard this expression before.)

      • http://twitter.com/revjospa Joanne Robertson

        The bigger the bow, the bigger the ho…

        • Anonymous

          Oh. Thanks for that. I was imagining some part of the anatomy and couldn’t quite figure out what would rhyme with ‘bow’ (and still make sense).

          • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1043171034 Tadiana Walton Jones

            Heh.  The rhyming thing didn’t even occur to me.  I was thinking maybe it was “The bigger the bow, the bigger the ass ….”

  • http://tigergray.blogspot.com/ Tiger Gray

    She looks carnival mirror huge in that dress. Not in a good way. 

  • Anonymous

    Ugh. Makes her look fat, and she is so not fat.

  • http://www.what-the-frock.com Dana WhatTheFrock

    Love the shoes, though.

    • Anonymous

      I love the shoes too, but am I crazy or do those colors REALLY not work with this dress? It’s a weird combo.

      • Anonymous

        I think so too, rum, but hey. At least it’s not matchy :)

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ZBFH32YG44LIIZYLSQPMBXMYCU Sarah

        They REALLY don’t. It’s like they snuck under there and she couldn’t see what colors they were because her huge puffy skirt had obscured everything below her sternum.

      • foodycat

        You are not crazy – those (awesome) shoes want another dress.

      • foodycat

        You are not crazy – those (awesome) shoes want another dress.

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=3310930 Angie O’Brien

        She probably figured the dress was so neutral she could wear whatever shoe she liked. So fabulous, so so incongruous. Hopefully she’ll keep them in her closet for another whirl with a more suited ensemble.

    • Anonymous

      MMHMMMM.

    • BerlinerNYC

      Those compellingly weird shoes are the only thing I like about the outfit.

    • BerlinerNYC

      Those compellingly weird shoes are the only thing I like about the outfit.

    • http://twitter.com/stellaphone Stella Zawistowski

      I want those shoes very badly. They’re screaming for a night of Argentine tango.

  • Anonymous

    my grandma had a toilet roll topper that was a dead ringer for this, right down to the dirty dishwater dress color!

  • Anonymous

    Ouch, so frumpy. This is how you take a tiny young thing and make her look chunky and washed out. 

    • Anonymous

      It would help if she would pull her head up and stand up straight.  She’s a little hunched over, which only makes her look small and stout.

      • Anonymous

        That was my first mind-shout – “STAND UP STRAIGHT!”  

      • Anonymous

        That was my first mind-shout – “STAND UP STRAIGHT!”  

  • Anonymous

    Just WHY are these colour dresses so popular? 

    UGH.

  • MilaXX

    That is so Not Her Dress. She is too tiny and short waisted for this and it’s making her look pudgy. Also? Color is a good thing

    • Anonymous

      It’s definitely not her dress, but it is anyone else’s dress?  I mean, look at that thing.  She’s tiny, and the way that skirt puffs out would make anyone look huge, fat, bulging.  The string of bows down the front don’t help.  And that color, has there ever been a worse color?  I didn’t think it was possible to make beige any less attractive than it already is, but this dress manages to do it.

      I think this is one of those dresses that belongs in a fire pit.  Burn it, I say, BURN IT!

  • Anna Vasquez

    Ian McKellan is my kindly-yet-fabulous gay uncle.

    • Maria Rosenfire

      Dibs on Stephen Fry!

      • Anonymous

        I claim Denis O’Hare!

  • Valerie Little

    Props to her for the cute, contrasting shoes, and her hair looks adorable, but the dress is really unflattering on many levels-shape, color, fit…

  • Anonymous

    I can only assume this dress was meant to be worn ironically.  It looks like she’s actually much more stylish than this, but her mother insisted on something only a sister wife would wear, so they compromised and settled on this dress.

  • Anonymous

    So I finally googled “Chloe Moretz” to find out who this child that’s suddenly everywhere is. My advice to her would be to see who styles Hailee Steinfeld and hire them yesterday. 

  • Anonymous

    recently it’s like everyone is trying to pretend they got cement butt injections from the crazy cement butt person whose photo keeps making the enormous butt rounds, among others, all over the internet.

    isnt she a little young for that? or maybe she just wants to look like she’s carrying around her tuffet. from the waist down. i dont know enough about celebrity culture to understand. maybe thats it.

  • Anonymous

    Does this remind anyone of (an albeit more feminine, conventional version of) April Johnson’s final Project Runway collection? 

  • Anonymous

    poor dear seems to have realized she made a mistake. I’m so glad I’m not famous. I couldn’t take the scrutiny

  • Anonymous

    Other than making her look like her butt is four sizes larger than her bust…and that it has no color…and that the bust is just weird with all those bows and stuff…and that the shoes don’t really work with this dress…other than all that, I’d say this is OK.

    Do they not allow the celebrities to have mirrors these days???

  • Sarah Lynnae

    I love the dress. I do. In spite of the bows. Unfortunately, it’s making her look short and squat. The shoes are an interesting choice, but it’s not working for me.

  • Terence Ng

    I’m almost less concerned with the color and bows than the bustle/bell shape. Not her friend.

  • Anonymous

    In a different colour, she’d look totally cute. Attention, Red Carpet Walkers:you skin and your clothing should not match.  There must be some contrast.

  • http://profiles.google.com/claudiaberry Claudia Berry

    she looks like her armpits are hanging from too tall crutches.

  • Mariah J

    That is one terrible dress.

  • http://twitter.com/BeantownMrs Praggya R. Barretto

    She kind of looks like a cake wreck… Like a Barbie cake or one of those moldy display cakes…

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=717955989 Barbara Affolter

    That dress is too long for her.  I think she needs a petite size.  The bodice is way too long, so the contouring isn’t hitting the right points on her torso.  It’s bunching up, which makes her look twice as wide as she probably is.  A whole slew of horizontally oriented detailing makes things even worse.  No part of this dress hits where it should.  The bodice starts just under her chin, the underwire looks like it hits an inch too low below her bust, and her waist is about 3 inches shorter than the waist on the dress.  Of course it isn’t her dress!  It’s obviously the dress of a girl who’s at least 5’10”!  

  • Sobaika Mirza

    It looks like she’s wearing hip bustles.

  • Anonymous

    Honestly, I could take the dress, bows and all, if it were in a color (or even black) and fit her better. She’s a tiny slip of a thing and the dress is enlarging her in an unflattering way. It’s not that every outfit has to make the wearer look “thin,” but I think this dress is supposed to be enhancing her natural appearance and it’s not.

    But I love that it is completely age-appropriate. Because I’m turning into my mother. 

  • Anonymous

    This girl has been featured a lot here lately, and I don’t think I have liked anything she has worn. I understand she’s young and experimenting to find her look, but she’s getting to be less appealing every time she leaves her house.

  • Anonymous

    The dress looks too small for her and too big all at once.  It’s a bad dress on a cute girl.  I think the biggest problem is that she doesn’t look comfortable or happy in this either.  There’s always a next time, dear! 

  • Anonymous

    She has run smack into Baby Miss Havisham territory with this one.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=688523517 Andrea Lynn Rossillon

      You’re right! And that’s actually why I like it. It’s discordant and creepy–elegant decay. And the shoes are awesome. But then again, I really dug April Johnson’s final collection.

      • Pennymac

        Elegant decay is the perfect discription of that color, that dress. Blech.

  • Anonymous

    That’s a lot of skirt.  All I can think of is the doll cakes they used to have when I was a kid (do they still have those?) where the cake part was a huge antebellum skirt…

    • https://profiles.google.com/104791269167429064986 Judy S

      Yes! I had those. I think now they have Barbies but in those days they were pre-Barbies, dolls with arm and head joints and open-close eyes with gentle, not very specific boobs. I loved making dresses for them by cutting arm and head holes in a square of cloth and tying a matching strip around the waist.

      At that age, the dress Chloe is wearing would have been my absolute dream dress.

    • https://profiles.google.com/104791269167429064986 Judy S

      Yes! I had those. I think now they have Barbies but in those days they were pre-Barbies, dolls with arm and head joints and open-close eyes with gentle, not very specific boobs. I loved making dresses for them by cutting arm and head holes in a square of cloth and tying a matching strip around the waist.

      At that age, the dress Chloe is wearing would have been my absolute dream dress.

  • Anonymous

    That is a majorly aggressive crinoline she’s wearing.  

  • Jessica Rowe

    oh. I like it. It’s like an 18th century ballerina dress. It’s fun.

  • http://twitter.com/anacedillo Ana Cedillo

    i dont really have a problem with the bows, i have a maj problem with the fact that the bottom of the dress just looks so odd and way to big on her, oh yeah and that color is not hers. so far im not the biggest fan of this girl, she is trying wayyy to hard with the lack of a genuine smile and pouting faces.

  • Anonymous

    It looks sort of like a strait jacket, albeit a very fancy one.  Not a good look, made worse but her apparent discomfort (both physical and mental).

  • http://www.facebook.com/dancinfool Ditty Nicolaides

    Could her ass look any bigger? I don’t think so. Ew…

  • Anonymous

    It looks WAY to big on her.. and those shoes are hiddy!

  • Anonymous

    hideous on many levels.

  • Monkey Toe

    Sweetie, you can’t hide Sterling Hayden from Mercedes McCambridge unless your dress is floor length. Try again.

  • http://profiles.google.com/ballinger.jl Jessica Ballinger

    You guys, I wish you could have seen the face I made when I saw that dress.

  • Anonymous

    Cute. Sweet .And Age appropriate. In.

  • Anonymous

    She shape of the dress is so not flattering.  It’s making a rather small girl look very bottom-heavy.

  • http://twitter.com/nicolahearts nicole seligman

    i want this. it’s just oversized enough to not be boring/too normal. her shoes are PERFECT. and i’ll always be pro-bow.

  • Anonymous

    That dress is up to her neck. Which is appropriate, seeing as she’s 14. My point is, this dress is not supposed to look like an almost-ruffle, and that color is atrocious.

  • http://naturallyeducational.com/ CandaceApril

    Looks like a paper doll…is it the wrong size? And that color is terrible on her.

    Anyway, make-up and hair are gorgeous and age-appropriate.

    I really hope she is surrounded by good people–she seems like a good kid.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=8201211 Kyle Moran
  • Judy_J

    Sweetie, darling….that color does nothing for you, and the shape of that dress is all wrong.  Listen to your pretend gay uncles; they will never steer you wrong.

  • http://rachbomb.livejournal.com Rachael J.

    it’d be cute if she had on killer shoes, those ones are so blah!

  • Anonymous

    God in heaven.

    All I can think is that it looked really good in the mirror. It’s happened to everyone, right? You put something on, look in the mirror, and think you look great. Then you see pictures. But it’s too late. The damage has been done.

  • Anonymous

     I think she stole the skirt and the hair ribbon off one of Degas’ “Little Dancers.” Put them back, honey. She’s 130 years old and looks better than you. 

  • http://twitter.com/delysia_lafosse Delysia LaFosse

    What is going on underneath that skirt? I’m not sure I’ve ever seen such a full skirt look so tragically sad and droopy – not that it would be terribly flattering, anyway. Also, that bodice looks awfully uncomfortable around the armpits. Yikes!

  • Anonymous

    Now give that dress back to Auntie Helena Bonham Carter

  • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

    WOW. That is one ugly dress.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sierra-Delta/100003182924700 Sierra Delta

    Miss Havisham would like her undergarments returned posthaste.

  • kjthorp

    I love her shoes!! But the rest, blah.

  • Anonymous

    I think her body is just physically too small for this dress. Like too short or something…

  • Anonymous

    Whoever approved that dress for her should be …. made to watch Season 9 Project Runway reruns over and over. What a horrible thing to do to the poor girl.

  • http://www.facebook.com/yanneng Yan Neng

    LOVE THE SHOES SO MUCH. The silhouette is weird though; would be better without so much puffiness on the sides.

  • http://twitter.com/revjospa Joanne Robertson

    at least that is the saying in the “urban” south LOL

  • Anonymous

    Also, much as I love and want those shoes, the pumpkin-colored trim on them them clashes with the pink undertones of the dress.

  • Anonymous

    I like the *idea* of this dress–a few tweaks and I would really love it.  Much less full in the hips, bows that don’t look so sad, and in a darker shade or a different color, and it would be a winner.

    Those shoes are hiddy, though.

  • Anonymous

    Pretty pretty face, then ALL WRONG from the neck down. Well, maybe those shoes with something else. And I love this girl!

  • http://vhanna26.typepad.com Vera

    At first, it was that big ol’ skirt that bugged me, but now the bows do too.  The shoes don’t work at all, but she’s still cute.

  • http://vhanna26.typepad.com Vera

    At first, it was that big ol’ skirt that bugged me, but now the bows do too.  The shoes don’t work at all, but she’s still cute.

  • Anonymous

    I don’t know… it’s almost like it’s several degrees too big on her. Degrees, not sizes, as if someone photoshopped the dress onto the picture and forgot to make sure the two images were on the same scale.

  • Anonymous

    I don’t know… it’s almost like it’s several degrees too big on her. Degrees, not sizes, as if someone photoshopped the dress onto the picture and forgot to make sure the two images were on the same scale.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

    Such a pretty girl.  Such a silly dress.  And shoes.  The dress looks massive.  Hire TLo as your gay uncles and fire your stylist dear.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

    Such a pretty girl.  Such a silly dress.  And shoes.  The dress looks massive.  Hire TLo as your gay uncles and fire your stylist dear.

  • Anonymous

    Her “oh no, what the hell have I done” expression in the third pic says it all.   This is outstandingly bad.  Why on earth would she want to look 5 sizes bigger than she is?    As Michael Kors once said, “it looks like she’s hiding a big fat ass” under that thing.  

  • Anonymous

    Her “oh no, what the hell have I done” expression in the third pic says it all.   This is outstandingly bad.  Why on earth would she want to look 5 sizes bigger than she is?    As Michael Kors once said, “it looks like she’s hiding a big fat ass” under that thing.  

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_EDI2DLE7DE3YPW2ONIHBWOVHMA ecallaw

    Love her choice of shoes with it–bravo.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_EDI2DLE7DE3YPW2ONIHBWOVHMA ecallaw

    Love her choice of shoes with it–bravo.

  • Anonymous

    Which museum did she borrow this from? At least her hair and make-up are super pretty.

  • Anonymous

    Which museum did she borrow this from? At least her hair and make-up are super pretty.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QP4RBTAZX6QTHZZSJ2YT7DGO7Q Brittany

    Gorge hair & makeup, and I enjoy her shoes. The dress feels a little overwhelming on her – but the nude makes it a tad more sophisticated. I don’t think it’s terribly inappropriate for a 14-year-old to be wearing though :)

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QP4RBTAZX6QTHZZSJ2YT7DGO7Q Brittany

    Gorge hair & makeup, and I enjoy her shoes. The dress feels a little overwhelming on her – but the nude makes it a tad more sophisticated. I don’t think it’s terribly inappropriate for a 14-year-old to be wearing though :)

  • Anonymous

    Now I know where the ballerina from my jewelry box went!!!

  • Anonymous

    Now I know where the ballerina from my jewelry box went!!!

  • Anonymous

    i can see why her mother won’t let her ‘own designer clothes’, she clearly enjoys them too much. she gives off this vibe of holier-than-thou when dressed this way…

  • Anonymous

    i can see why her mother won’t let her ‘own designer clothes’, she clearly enjoys them too much. she gives off this vibe of holier-than-thou when dressed this way…

  • Anonymous

    I don’t like the way it explodes outward at her hips. She’s tiny in stature and this dress isn’t her friend. The bottom half is straight out of the court of King Louis.

  • Anonymous

    I don’t like the way it explodes outward at her hips. She’s tiny in stature and this dress isn’t her friend. The bottom half is straight out of the court of King Louis.

  • Anonymous

    Is she the newest version of the toilet papaer holder?!  WTF Chloe…

  • Anonymous

    Is she the newest version of the toilet papaer holder?!  WTF Chloe…

  • Anonymous

    “Dirty pillows! Dirty pillows!” Seriously, but this is dirty ace bandage. And horribly unflattering hip flounce situation. 

  • aimee_parrott

    Ooh, those shoes deserve a better dress!

  • CQAussie

    Wow….it’s amazing how she lost 8 inches off her height from that one skirt.  The bodice is fine but wow, that skirt is quite literally swallowing her whole.  What a shame.  But the shoes are HOT.  LOVE!

  • Basil Von Broccoli

    Is anyone else thinking of Degas’ bronze statue series? You know, the ones of the teenage ballerina?

    It’s just… with that reference in mind I actually kind of like this.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3AJ237ND3GAHDQJZ4TLCO4WLRA Emily

    Love the dress – it needs to be a color though.  Love the shoes, but not with dress.

  • Anonymous

    aww, this was so close to being a pretty pretty princess. needs a vibrant color.

  • Anonymous

    Oh dear.  The color is ALL WRONG and she looks like she’s wearing a bustle (or just has an enormous bum).  The line of the skirt is very cute and I like the shoes.  So, if she were in a shop, I’d say “Good start” and send her back to the dressing room.

  • http://phantomminuet.blogspot.com/ MinAgain

    In what fairy tale do those shoes go with that dress?

  • Anonymous

    That’s a whole lot of Bandaids.

  • Anonymous

    That dress is swallowing her whole.  Like a snake.  Not a pretty image….

  • http://profiles.google.com/misslauraschultz Laura Schultz

    What a weird dress. Strangely bulky. Agreed re color.

  • Anonymous

    NO…just, NO.

  • Anonymous

    She should also stay away from dresses that look as if they’re for hiding children under them in a production of The Nutcracker. This thing makes her as wide as she is tall.

    I do hope she gets over the “I want to look old enough to have children who are old enough to drink” thing soon.

  • http://twitter.com/Alloyjane Alloy Jane

    Because every girl needs a dress that makes her look like a giant chicken mcnugget.

  • Anonymous

    anyone rememebr the “fat asses” from the Sonny and Cher show????/OMG..Guuuurrrlll…buy a full length mirror!

  • Rachel Sawyer

    Having just experienced 2 plus hours of Chloe Moretz mugging her way thru Hugo I’m not inclined to cut her any slack. Ugh.

  • Anonymous

    wait, is that big-ass bows or big ass-bows?  probably best to avoid both.

  • vmcdanie

    Yes, the shape is too frumpy and the color is not working but she is so lovely and poised it still almost works.

    I know this goes without saying, but this little liebchen is mad talented. I hope she is surrounded by wise, nurturing people.

  • oohsparkley!

    Horrifying!

  • http://frockpaperscissors.blogspot.com/ kvlm

    i love the skirt and i actually dig the color; but the bodice speaks too much to her youth and the shoes are killing me.