Sarah Jessica, we’re a bit confused.
Sarah Jessica Parker attends the Friends in Deed 20th Anniversary Gala at the American Museum of Natural History in New York City. SJP paired her Donna Karan dress with an Olivier Theyskens for Theory jacket.
We’ll get to everything below the neck in a minute. For now, let’s focus on your head. In brief: your head looks fantastic. This is why we’re puzzled. Why doesn’t your head look like this all the time? Why are we constantly subjected to unflattering hair and makeup with you? Why don’t you keep this style of head permanently? You suddenly look ten years younger and like you gained a healthy 5 pounds or so. Is there a new gay applying your makeup? Or did you take matters in your own hands after your old gay kept sending you out with witchy face and hair? Whatever the reason, keep this head, please.
Now, you’re posing very badly here, but we’ll still do our best with what you’ve given us and assess the outfit. It’s chilly in New York right now so we’re fine with the jacket. We also think the dress is quite chic in a pseudo-1920s way without being too literal about it. It’s just that when you pair them like that and only bother with the expected black pump, it all looks a little… vertical. Droopy, even. We also think you’ve lost the ability to pick jewelry, if you ever had it at all. Three different necklaces of varying lengths, styles, and thickness are distracting and a bit weird-looking. We like pretty much everything you’ve got on, but we’re not convinced they’re all working together.
But still. Great job on the head.
IN! It’s NYC chic in that Donna Karan kind of way!
OUT! Nothing here goes with anything else!
Gaga’s salute to “Harvest Gold” was widely debated, but the final vote came down to OUT.
[Photo by Theo Wargo/Getty Images]