“Evening With Ralph Lauren” Red Carpet

Posted on October 26, 2011

Kittens, Oprah hosted something called “An Evening With Ralph Lauren” in New York City and none of us were invited. But that’s fine. It makes it easier to judge the people who were. Of course they were all wearing Calvin Klein for the evening.

We joke; they were all head to toe in Ralph Lauren, of course. But wouldn’t it have been funny if they all decided to play a joke on Ralph and show up in Michael Kors or something? This is why no one will ever hire us to be stylists. We’d be too bitchy about it. Anyway, we can’t be too bitchy about anything anyone’s wearing here because they all brought it, big time. Rare is the moment when everyone hits the red carpet looking their best, so we’ll save our bitchiness for another time. Well done, celebrities. Perhaps you should consider having these theme nights more often. Seems to bring out the best in you when you don’t have too many choices.

 

Barbara Walters

Love the dark purple velvet on her.

 

Camilla Belle

Stunning.

 

Jessica Alba

Also stunning.

 

Kerry Washington

Stunning and FIERCE AS SHIT.

 

Lauren Bush

A classic, and something that would probably look boring on a flashier red carpet, but it works perfectly here.

 

Naomi Watts

Ooooh, honey. You were last in the line to pick dresses weren’t you? No one wanted the one that needs constant steaming. Pretty, but she needed to be lowered into the event from a crane if she wanted to avoid those wrinkles.

 

Uma Thurman

Love the color on her. A bit tight across her boobs, though.

 

[Photo Credit: Getty]

  • Anonymous

    Kerry Washington – FTW. I really love the Naomi Watts dress, but satin is SUCH a bitch. As a person with substantial boobage, I find the crew neckline not very attractive…I’m looking at you Uma.

    • http://profiles.google.com/ameliaheartsu Amelia Logan

      I carry over from my days of having a big boobs a fear of crew necks. 

  • Anonymous

    I sincerely hope Kerry Washington arrived in a palanquin. Borne by four scantily clad beauties. This get-up deserves nothing less.

    • Anonymous

      Somebody needs to make her a major movie star, like yesterday already.

  • Anonymous

    Camilla Belle looks absolutely divine. I couldn’t really see the lower half of her dress in this image, but found it on Us Weekly’s website. Wow. What a gorgeous gown. She is the picture of perfection.

  • Stefanos Mantyla

    Camilla Belle is the best here, but they are all really good, this time.

  • http://tigergray.blogspot.com/ Tiger Gray

    Jesus, Kerry Washington. How you gonna look so good? (I don’t like when Uma Thurman tries to look conventional. She’s always looked odd to me in a totally cool way so I feel like classic dresses just take away from her uniqueness )

  • Anonymous

    Camilla FTW.
    Kerry, you look beautiful. Stop dieting right now! One Thandi Newton is enough.

  • Joseph Davidson

    I absolutely adore Naomi Watts but I always feel like her fashion choices fall short.  They’re never overtly terrible, they’re just always verging on good.  She makes interesting decisions, but can’t carry them off.  It makes me sad…for myself.

  • Anonymous

    Kerry Washington is not WERQing it. She’s IMANing it.

    • Andreas Plaianu

      Preach it! Not seen anybody this fierce beside IMAN for a long time! And in case you’re wondering, IMAN is supposed to be all caps as is SWINTON and from now on WASHINGTON!

    • Anonymous

      Ms. Washington should play Cleopatra and make her entrance in THAT DRESS.

    • Anonymous

      Ditto. Kerry never looked better!

  • http://profiles.google.com/shannonlstewart Shannon Stewart

    Uma’s is wrinkling oddly across her midriff too — it’s making her look a bit flabby and I know she isn’t.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1344922354 Eric Scheirer Stott

      They might have been uncomfortable, but when women wore girdles their dresses fit better.

      • http://profiles.google.com/shannonlstewart Shannon Stewart

        You don’t need a girdle to make your dress fit — you need your dress to fit properly, and be made out of a flattering material for your body. 

        And in Uma’s case, I can guarantee a girdle wouldn’t have helped because her stomach is already flat and hard enough to act as if she was girded. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/shawn.eric.hill Shawn Hill

    A bit matronly on Uma, and Camilla looks like the Empire State Bldg. come to life, but wow, Kerry Washington!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_EDI2DLE7DE3YPW2ONIHBWOVHMA ecallaw

    I wish Uma had better posture here.

    DAY-UM, Kerry Washington!

  • BerlinerNYC

    Lauren Bush’s dress is riding a bit low on the rack, dontcha think? It just looks wrong. As if it had been photoshopped onto her afterwards. She looks just a couple of millimeters away from double wardrobe malfunction. Naomi’s dress may have a few wrinkles, but it’s classy, and the girls are in for the night.

  • http://twitter.com/hpenfield Hannah Penfield

     And it’s Kerry Washington by a landslide. Bitch is FIIIIIIEEEEEEERCE.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mary-Elizabeth-Poytinger-Baumer/1516981341 Mary Elizabeth Poytinger Baume

    Ms. Washington and Iman need to go head to head in the bow down department

  • Anonymous

    Camilla Belle looks gorgeous, but aren’t there, like, two design elements too many to that dress: mesh top, glittery fabric, silver art deco embellishments, AND feathery train? The last one-third just doesn’t match.

    • Sobaika Mirza

      Agreed. She looks great, but there’s just a bit too much going on. And I think her hair is too slicked back.

    • Anonymous

      Yeah, I wondered why the feathery train was tacked on there. Why?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

    Though Kerry is certainly fierce, I can’t help but think of those women who use those stacks of rings to stretch their necks.  I’m just happy to see a line up of ladies looking classy.  No Oprah?

    • Anonymous

      I thought the same thing! I thought how lovely it was, but how sad the story behind its obvious inspiration.  She looks gorgeous, though.

  • Anonymous

    I want Camilla Belle’s dress — that beading is DIVINE.

  • Anonymous

    Barbara Walters looks fantastic!
    They all look really good, but I think in this group Camilla Belle steals the show.

  • Anonymous

    All the choices Uma must have had, and she shows up a boring, mismatched top and skirt? Naomi looks a little less than spectacular, too. The rest are amazing. Camilla Belle is my favorite. Like an Erté drawing.

  • Anonymous

    They should all have just left after Kerry Washington sashayed into town….Fierce As Shit indeed!

  • http://profiles.google.com/grandiva1968 e jerry powell

    Uma is on trend with the positively matronly set.  I mean, I know she’s 41, but jeeez

  • http://www.joannao.blogspot.com JoannaOC

    Camilla Belle seems to be an embodiment of the “golden ratio” in that dress. Something about her proportions feels so perfectly balanced.

  • Anonymous

    Kerry looks awesome and like she will CUT YOU if you don’t bow down.  Maybe she’s been taking Iman-itude classes or something.

  • Anonymous

    Can anyone point me to another picture of the Camilla Belle dress? (from a collection shoot or whatever.)  They really should have had a carpet different than that dark blue…everyone wore dark colors, and they just sort of melt into the floor.  I’d like to see more of what’s going on at the bottom, because I love Art Deco-ish stuff.

    • Anonymous

      I am disappointed that I can’t make out much of anything from the knees down because, as you point out, the carpet and dark dresses blend together. But from the knees up everyone looks like…they’re wearing the same designer’s dresses, and styled to match!

  • Anonymous

    Belle and Washington win this round. Their dresses are phenomenal and they are rocking them.

  • http://profiles.google.com/trashilove { edi } ilovetrash

    i hate to say it but it’s cos w/ ralph lauren there are no gimmicks.
    i cant believe i am standing up for lipschitz, there, but, you know, i am very sick of dresses that are two dresses stuck together; pieces that pretend they are avant garde but which are merely ugly; colors & shapes that are so à la mode that not only are they unattractive but they will date, & badly, in six months; vague copies of what gaga wears [which are, themselves, absolute copies of what anyone interesting wore w/in the last three or four decades], etc & ect. if i can say anything for lipschitz: he is not that.

  • http://profiles.google.com/trashilove { edi } ilovetrash

    i hate to say it but it’s cos w/ ralph lauren there are no gimmicks.
    i cant believe i am standing up for lipschitz, there, but, you know, i am very sick of dresses that are two dresses stuck together; pieces that pretend they are avant garde but which are merely ugly; colors & shapes that are so à la mode that not only are they unattractive but they will date, & badly, in six months; vague copies of what gaga wears [which are, themselves, absolute copies of what anyone interesting wore w/in the last three or four decades], etc & ect. if i can say anything for lipschitz: he is not that.

  • http://profiles.google.com/trashilove { edi } ilovetrash

    i hate to say it but it’s cos w/ ralph lauren there are no gimmicks.
    i cant believe i am standing up for lipschitz, there, but, you know, i am very sick of dresses that are two dresses stuck together; pieces that pretend they are avant garde but which are merely ugly; colors & shapes that are so à la mode that not only are they unattractive but they will date, & badly, in six months; vague copies of what gaga wears [which are, themselves, absolute copies of what anyone interesting wore w/in the last three or four decades], etc & ect. if i can say anything for lipschitz: he is not that.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Catherine-Rhodes/602850414 Catherine Rhodes

    Thank god the stars are wearing jewelery again! Seems like as a nod to the recession they’ve sworn off accessories on the Red Carpet. Not here!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Catherine-Rhodes/602850414 Catherine Rhodes

    Thank god the stars are wearing jewelery again! Seems like as a nod to the recession they’ve sworn off accessories on the Red Carpet. Not here!

  • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

    Jessica Alba looks like she has candy canes on her dress.

  • Anonymous

    Camilla Bell for the win.

  • Anonymous

    Alba’s got too much bunching around her hips, no?  Or is it supposed to be like that?

  • MilaXX

    Everyone mostly looks good. Naomi & Uma could have used a little more help. That’s the best Jessica Alba has looked since she gave birth.

  • Anonymous

    Camilla Belle’s dress reminds me of the Chrysler building (in a good way), she looks lovely. I am also really enjoying Kerry Washington’s gorgeous look. She’s WERQing it so hard I have to whisper. werq.

    • http://twitter.com/MajorBedhead MajorBedhead

      I think that’s why I love it so much. That’s my favourite building ever. And the dress is stunning 

  • Anonymous

    Camilla Belle is my new celebrity crush.  I’d turn for her.  OMG!  HOT!

  • Anonymous

    Kerry Washington FTW. Camilla Belle’s right up there with her but KW is FIERCE.

  • Anonymous

    Baba Wawa looks Wow.

    Naomi Watts always seems a little off no matter what she wears. It seems to me she rarely hits the mark.

  • Anonymous

    I’ve always loved his eveningwear. Classy and sexy at the same time.  Oh, and Kerry Washington for the win!

  • Anonymous

    Those are some awesome shoes on Miss Uma.

  • Anonymous

    Uma’s bra does not seem to be doing its job. Perhaps a visit to Bra Smyth is called for.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_GFMOZFM3WT3T56EZHVZFK7UXSI Ramon

    I guess they were all afraid to make Oprah mad. As Kathy Griffin said, she owns us and could get us killed.

  • Anonymous

    Lots of swell looks here. 
    And a big “Thank You!” to whoever did the understated background. Compare it to the mess that Sarah Jessica parker got stuck in front of!

  • http://aintbaroque.wordpress.com/ Ain’t Baroque

    Weirdly enough… I want what Walters is wearing.

  • http://asskickingadviser.com/ Ass Kicking Adviser

    Uma needs boob reduction surgery. There. I said it.
    When I am 702, I want to look as good as Barbara Walters.
    Kerry W. is brilliant and someone who never gets enough praise. She is ‘lifetime achievement’ material here. Gorgeous!!
    Lauren Bush and Naomi Watts are not – um, how to put this nicely?  – necessary.

  • Anonymous

    The gown Camilla Belle is wearing is S-T-U-N-N-I-N-G and she looks amazing in it.  Kerry W. is right behind her.

  • Anonymous

    My friend’s mother once met Ralph Lauren at an event, when introduced she said to him  “I LOVE your sheets” funniest thing ever

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F3HKIK7MIJMBDAQBDWEAQDTXUM theneva

    Whoa. When did Uma Thurman’s tits get so big? Have they always been big and I just missed it or did she just have a baby (or boob job)?

  • Anonymous

    I have only seen Camilla Belle in a film where she was a mute- anyone know if she can act?   I am Elizabeth Taylor’s number one fan and I hereby give my permission for Belle to play her in the Scorsese film if she can act…hehe