In or Out: Salma Hayek in Alexander McQueen

Posted on September 12, 2011

We’re not sure we’ve ever featured two red carpet posts in a row featuring looks from the same designer, but we thought this was yet another graphic illustration of the Number One T Lo Fashion Maxim: Girl, That Is NOT Your Dress.

Salma Hayek in Alexander McQueen Salma Hayek attends the premiere of “Americano” during the 36th Toronto International Film Festival in an Alexander McQueen dress.

Alexander McQueen Resort 2012 Collection/Model: Josefien Rodermans

Salma Hayek in Alexander McQueen

Salma Hayek in Alexander McQueen

Salma Hayek in Alexander McQueen

Salma Hayek in Alexander McQueen

Yikes.

When we were scrolling through the wire services looking for red carpet looks to rip to shreds discuss like grownups, we saw the thumbnails of these pictures, recognized the dress and said “Oh, we can do a post about Salma wearing Alexander McQueen.”

“Wait a minute, SALMA HAYEK is wearing ALEXANDER McQUEEN?”

That’s like Tilda Swinton wearing Diane von Furstenberg. The more you think about it, the more wrong it sounds. Salma works best in either sultry looks that play up her latin beauty or classically chic looks that work well with her body. McQueen – especially this kind of McQueen – has too much of hard edge for her soft curves. It just isn’t a good match. We really love this dress but we don’t love it on her at all. The stiff, almost armor-like bust is NOT being friendly to her girls. We also don’t think that huge “belt” (which is really just part of the dress) works with her curves either. Not that it’s unflattering in any way; she still has a slammin’ bod and it shows; just that we don’t think the way it breaks up her body is the best way to show it off. And we’re not convinced these autumnal tones are her best color scheme. The gold peep-toe slingbacks are, well, a bit tacky, frankly. This look didn’t need any more metallic accents. The Elvis mullet is just tragic. And we haven’t even bothered to mention that it all looks a bit tight on her. Oh wait. We just did.

Honey, you’re gorgeous and INSANELY wealthy. There’s just no reason for you to wear anything for public appearances that doesn’t make you look spectacular. These harder edged fashion-y looks just aren’t for you, dear. Now go home and put on a tight red gown with a sweetheart neckline. That NEVER gets old with you.

 

Vote Now!

 

IN! She’s taking a RISK, you judgmental bitches!

 

OUT! She looks like she wants to kick my ass! Hold me, T Lo!

 

 

Marisa Tomei’s far more successful attempt at wearing metallics was voted IN.

 

 

[Photo Credit: PacificCoastNews, elle.com]

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