Kardashian Kollection Launch Party

Posted on August 18, 2011

Darlings, the International Association of Hookers and Gold Diggers had their annual konvention in Hollywood!

And the working girls all kame out to blow kisses at th– hang on.

Oh. Sorry. This isn’t a kollection of hookers; it’s the Kardashian Klan and Friends at the launch party for The Kardashian Kollection for Sears. You kan see how we might have made that mistake.

Boy, you put some of these gals in cheap klothes from Sears and the illusion just dies on the vine, doesn’t it? Let’s assess:

 

Kim Kardashian

“America! Buy my cheap klothes! Look how awful they make me look!”

Honey, the pitch needs some work.


Cassie Scerbo

Just finished her kashier shift with enough time to change her shoes and hit the red karpet.

 

Kendall Jenner

It’s ugly, but at least it’s not tacky in a “Mrs. Roper gets frisky” kind of way (see: Kardashian, Kim).

 

Aubrey O’Day

Good & Whorey.

 

Kylie Jenner

Kylie! Kan you tell us why Kim chose the ugliest outfit and you got to wear this, which is klassy in komparison, even if does look like it’s krushing you a bit?

 

Kris Jenner

All the other kougars in the trailer park are so jealous right now.

 

Kourtney Kardashian

“I’m the klassy Kardashian! Cheap lace and pussy bows! Kan you see my legs?”

 

Melissa Rycroft

Trash kan liner.

 

Khloe Kardashian

Kountless synthetic kats gave their lives for this kollection. Let’s pause for a moment and remember them. They deserved better than this.

 

Jasmine Dustin

She’s not wearing something from the kollection! It looks like it might be from JK Penney! Infidel! Seize her!

[Photo Credit:  Jason Merritt/Getty Images, sears.com]

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