Pairs Division: Paquin and Moyer

Posted on June 22, 2011

TWO “Pairs Division” entries in one day! God bless celebucouples for being so entertaining. That said, do these two have a portmanteau yet? We don’t follow True Blood fandom, even though Lorenzo went from loving to liking the show. Paquer? Moyquin? Sounds like generic drug names.

Onward.

Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer attend season 4 premiere of “True Blood” in LA. Anna Paquin is wearing a Versus dress and Brian Atwood shoes.

Versus Fall 2011 Collection/Model: Jenny Sinkaberg

Kittens, we canNOT with Missie Moyer and her Lady Clairol hair anymore. People say it’s for the role, but he wears it like that year round and even so, isn’t there some shade that looks good both in pictures and in video? Does he have to sport such a blatantly artificial-looking color all the time? Don’t vampires have highlights and lowlights? And call us unfair if you want, but when a man his age sports such an obviously fake color job, we automatically assume he’s held together with wig tape and dentures. Bitchy? Yes. But we’ve said this before: women have more leeway to go the “holding on to my youth” look because they have makeup and earrings and a wider array of hair and clothing styles to help complete the picture. He just looks like a large chipmunk fell asleep on his head.

Oh, right. This is a “Pairs Division.”

HE: See above, plus: The suit’s nice and we appreciate both the plaid and the vest. The hem on the pants is a skosh long, but not too painful. But we just can’t ignore the elephant dung in the room, sitting on his head. The whiskers aren’t helping either, Santa. It’s only pointing out what’s already obvious. He’s a very good-looking man and we’re not totally opposed to the aging man deploying his little tricks, but you really have to get it right or it’s extremely noticeable. Score: 6/10. The suit’s almost perfect, but who can see it?

SHE: Looks cute. We don’t love the Christmas tinsel running across her stomach, but kudos to her for wearing something a little less extravagant and less expensive on the red carpet while still looking pretty stylish. That’s not the best use of her hair and we always feel the neutral makeup she wears isn’t her best choice. Blonde, brown-eyed and tan could use a little color on the face. Score: 8/10.

Combined Score: 7/10. Seriously, Stephen. Go on strike if you have to, but HBO must stop forcing you to look like a fugitive who just dyed his hair in a motel bathroom. And if it’s not HBO’s fault, get better lighting in your bathroom and pay someone at least a couple of hundred bucks a month to do your tips and roots.

 

[Photo Credit: WireImage]

    • Anonymous

      That sheer panel on that dress is comically awful.  Purple tinsel?  Really.  REALLY.

      • Anonymous

        It’s like an “Unconventional Materials” challenge where they had to shop at ChristmasTree Shoppe.

        • Anonymous

          You could not be more right!  

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3KCDEX4FOTCFHZP6WLKSOOKUVM Danielle

      I like that she shortened the dress, but underboob is not something I needed to see.

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MNMVM2GPVUEIOJXBOSLCXKAW4U judy brown

        Underboob, and rib cage peeking through her dress.

        Add the purple tinsel…

        • Anonymous

          Oh, my, is that her ribs?  In that first shot that looks like pecs on her upper stomach?  Girl needs a sandwich.  2 sandwiches.

        • http://profiles.google.com/anplica Anplica Fiore

          Amen!!  Isn’t that what doubled sided tape was created to hide?  The underboob that is – not the tinsel…

    • rocioh

      I feel like her boobs are upside down… it’s just weird. Like the top part is an upside down bra

    • Anonymous

      i could handle the tinsel if it weren’t for the peek-a-boob.

      He? Well, I think that’s the same hair my dollar-store-Barbee had and the same haircut my older brother gave her

    • http://visceralresponse.com Dina dV

      Since Bill supposedly was turned when he was 30, they really do need to keep his unnaturally darker hair for the role.  Should have aged the character up by a few years and maybe Moyer could have had his natural hair for the role, but they’re stuck with the dark hair. Why he doesn’t let the gray come in between seasons is his secret, but I do understand why at this point, since I think they just finished shooting the season very recently, it looks as badly as it does.

      And while he does look rather dashing from the hairline down, which is something I almost never think about Moyer, the Nordic God also chose to wear a three-piece suit, in navy, along with a knit tie of all things and, well, Stephen, as is his wont, paled by comparison.  Not his fault because notwithstanding the hair, he looked about as good as he could.  He just can’t look like ASkars.

      And I think her makeup would actually work with her natural color, but she’s stuck with the bottle blonde as long as the show’s on.  It looks like she, or her make up artist, is following the advice of only emphasizing the eyes or the lips, which is good advice for regular daytime makeup but not when she’s getting photographed.  A more noticeable lip color and I think her face would look flawless. 

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=513945580 Megan Patterson

        Well apparenlty also his hair is like blonde when they don’t dye it? But I am not opposed to them casting 10 years older because given the time period when he was born, he would have looked a lot older at 30 than men do now, just because life was so much harder, and like, no moisturizer.

        • http://soyeahsoblog.blogspot.com April and Maya

          Also, he’d been in a war, and that ages people.  

      • Anonymous

        I’m with you on her make-up. I think it’s really pretty, not to mention perfectly done (enviously so), but girlfriend needs some lip color.

        RE: his hair color. I do believe I had that shade when I was in beauty school, in 1982.

    • Jill Roberts

      The corset thingy looks like a slightly inappropriate version of an arts-and-crafts project I made with pipe cleaners while at summer camp.

    • Anonymous

      I don’t understand giving that dress a pass. I might wake up screaming from that dress.

    • http://twitter.com/A_SmallFry AC

      I really don’t like her dress. You can see her entire ribcage (which isn’t even that noticeable on the emaciated model). It looks painfully obvious she’s using all her energy to suck her stomach in too. Not a good look.

    • Anonymous

      I can’t get behind 8/10 for her.  Her torso looks like a caged carnival animal on display.  I don’t think anyone could pull off the bust of that dress.

      He looks great from the neck down, but that hair color is indeed egregious.

    • Anonymous

      Not loving the dress but compared to the Lady Clairol hair she looks alright. It doesn’t even matter what HE wears as his hair steals the scene no matter what. Awful!

    • Anonymous

      Oh, see, I thought you were talking about HER haircolor! (I prefer her as a brunette.)  That dress, though. It’s bad enough in the longer version on the model, but the short version is even worse.  Was this from the “make an evening look using materials you find in a Hallmark holiday store” challenge?

    • bookish

      That dress is god awful. Purple tinsel? Underboob? Crazy looking abs? I just don’t get it.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=513945580 Megan Patterson

      YES! That Christmas tinsel is horrid. Oh and I just noticed that underboob. Sorry underboob, but no.
      And poor SMoy, committing the cardinal sin of dying greying hair too dark. It’s ALWAYS gonna look fake!

    • Anonymous

      I don’t know … in that first picture the sheer middle looks like it is exposing cartoonish 90 year old low hanging boobs. (under the tinsel)  It so distracted me, that when I read your comments, I had to go see his hair; because I had not noticed it.

      • Anonymous

        I saw the same! Like two fried eggs, or a boob replacement you carry under the first pair.
        That dress is so amateur it’s painful. 

        • Anonymous

          Yes. I saw it too. I’m assuming it’s a weird reflection bouncing off the Christmas decorations, but that’s an awfully specific reflection going on there.

    • Anonymous

      This is one ugly dress and her hair looks 1960’s tea party, and you gave her an 8? Really?

    • Anonymous

      “He just looks like a large chipmunk fell asleep on his head.”

      If life had not taught me not to utter these words, I would assure you, gentlemen, that “I shall never leave you.”

    • Anonymous

      I would have given him 4/10 because of, in addition to all you said, the 3-piece suit.  I just don’t like them at all.  She looks pretty good in an awful dress; because it’s an awful dress (I mean seriously, the panel looks like there are breasts painted on them in two of those pictures!) I would have given her a 5/10 for poor taste.  Combined score of 4.5/10.  A lotta room for improvement!

    • Sara Morris

      Agreeing with the other Bitter Kittens.  That dress is so awful I didn’t even notice his hair or her lack of, well, anything else.  Gawd, that’s just plain fugly – it doesn’t even look good on the model on the runway!  Burn it!

    • Anonymous

      If he went to a professional hair stylist, his hair wouldn’t be that awful color. A colorist can mix the dyes so that the hair color is very natural looking. It’s not like he doesn’t have the money for it. Hell, even if he did it at home, there are more natural looking colors than that. Seriously. He is probably a good looking guy, but it’s hard to see anything past that horrible hair. I think part of the reason for the dye job is also because he is a lot older than she is and thinks he’s fooling everyone by trying to look younger. I guess the joke’s on him…

    • Tamara Hogan

      If Moyer’s going to wear that (unnatural) hair color, it would be advantageous to shave off the (really kinda hot) gray scruff. His expression is a little Blue Steel but it’s working for me. ;-)  

    • aimee_parrott

      She: looks like she’s smuggling two silicon booblets under the sheer part of her dress, and that in addition to the (presumably real) underboob going on there.  Plus she’s wearing purple tinsel.

      He: looks like he let his dog do his hair color.

      Good god.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_U5LTVYHX32MGMMXR33G7TOXVR4 Magdalena Monzerrat Ontiveros

      the fug girls post about this is more realistic, check it out here: http://gofugyourself.com/anna-fugquin-06-2011

    • Anonymous

      The Missouri – Pacific railroad tracks are known as “Mo-Pac,” so I vote MoPaq.

      Her dress looks like it was constructed from something else in a challenge. Tinsel & under-boob, as noted by several, are not sartorial assets. -5  Though I give her big credit for making it resemble a gymnast’s costume through her compact and toned body. +2 = 7/10

      It’s not that he dyes his hair, it’s that it looks like such a flat, undifferentiated color and a bit too dark for his coloring. (Though I guess that might be for dramatic vampiric effect.) Still, his hair does NOT have to look so blatantly fake to be darker than his “true age.” Either as vampire or actor. Highlights, low lights, any kind of color variation. It looks like he dyes it at home, himself, and that Just. Can’t. Be. So.   Can it?  Suit is great, though I think the pocket square is too dark. Still, bonus points, +2. But, oops! lost one. Shave already. -1.  Hair. I. Hate. Hair. -5.  = 6/10

      Combined score, 6.5/10

      • Anonymous

        It occurs to me that if a professional colorist does his hair, it must hurt him/her to make it look like that.

      • Anonymous

        It occurs to me that if a professional colorist does his hair, it must hurt him/her to make it look like that.

      • Anonymous

        How about Annaphen?

        • Anonymous

          Hmm, sounds like in a pinch they could be a cameo character in The Lord of the Rings. A lord or lady of Rohan.

    • Anonymous

      She looks cute except for the middle part.  I wish she would get her teeth fixed.  He needs to shave.  

      • Anonymous

        Speaking as a fellow gap-tooth, I hope she never gets them fixed.

        • Anonymous

          Her teeth give her some character. If she “fixed” then she’d look like every other plastic, generic, Hollywood starlet.

    • http://twitter.com/margo8461 Marguerite

      LOL! Agreed. I might discover he’s a good looking man if could get my eyes past his hair. Don’t love her look at all. Think you scored the tinsel dress a little too high. The hem hits her at just the wrong place and makes her thighs look kind of thick instead of toned, as they obviously are. And the tinsel. Well, just the adjective says enough. Ha!

    • Anonymous

      I have no words for how horrid her ribcage looks in that first picture. I can’t stop staring at it with morbid fascination.

    • aussiegal77

      Underboob!!!!  Douchey suit + unshaven…..YUCK.  

      Clearly my tourette’s has kicked in for the arvo!

    • aussiegal77

      Underboob!!!!  Douchey suit + unshaven…..YUCK.  

      Clearly my tourette’s has kicked in for the arvo!

    • Anonymous

      I can’t believe you gave her an 8/10!!  That dress is AWFUL!!  It was ugly on the runway but she is way too short for this piece of crap and it’s glitter Wonder Woman midriff thing.  HORRIBLE!!  He looks prett good, I ‘mnot crazy about his hair color either but it isn’t the worst thing in the picture.   She is.

      • margaret meyers

        Ice skating outfit.

      • margaret meyers

        Ice skating outfit.

    • Anonymous

      Anna P’s got great legs so I understand the desire to show them off, but I think that shortening this dress throws off the proportions and already the dress isn’t doing her any favors. Better she should have found something else. I like that she didn’t over accessorize it, though.

    • Anonymous

      I know I need to get a life but that hair is E.O. (Extra Offensive) because he’s got such a great looking face. A face that looks way better with the marks of his (approximate) real age on it than I would’ve thought it looked at 25. And can I just sigh wistfully when I look at him? Oooh, nooo, I have to wince in pain at his awful hair.

    • http://twitter.com/Space_Kitty Space_Kitty

      I honestly can’t understand her dress.  It looks like it was pasted together from felt & pipe cleaners.  Maybe she wore it to pull focus from his taxidermy hair?  Seriously, if he must dye it to look more ‘youthful’ (NOT WORKING) it should at least go with his skin tone.

      Sad, because they’re a really cute couple.

    • http://twitter.com/Space_Kitty Space_Kitty

      I honestly can’t understand her dress.  It looks like it was pasted together from felt & pipe cleaners.  Maybe she wore it to pull focus from his taxidermy hair?  Seriously, if he must dye it to look more ‘youthful’ (NOT WORKING) it should at least go with his skin tone.

      Sad, because they’re a really cute couple.

    • Erica Moon

      Really?  You like the dress?  hmmm…look a bit closer.  Weird body things happening. And he looks like a vacuum cleaner salesman.

      • Anonymous

        The kind that throws a clod of dirt on the rug, and then plugs in the vacuum cleaner, only the electricity’s been turned off?

    • Anonymous

      8/10 for  helmet hair, tinsel, and awkward underboob? REALLY?

      • http://twitter.com/thelilerin erin l.

        hah, i didn’t even notice the underboob because of his hair, but atrocious!

        • Anonymous

          Oh, my God, I didn’t notice it, either, and now it’s all I can see. It’s on the model, too. It’s everywhere!

    • Anonymous

      Moyer always bugs me, there’s just so something odd about his whole appearance. If he’s going to dye his hair he needs to touch up his gray beard with that stuff Emmitt Smith and Keith Hernandez pitch.

    • Zubair Ghumro

      His hair is painful but your obsession with hem is too much. Get over it, most of the people don’t even notice it. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Katherine-Lavender/553350310 Katherine Lavender

      God, they’re a sneery couple aren’t they?

    • Anonymous

      They annoy. Too much to look at their garb.

    • Anonymous

      That panel on her dress makes it look like thisclose to being a cheap Halloween costume you find in a grocery store.

    • Anonymous

      That panel on her dress makes it look like thisclose to being a cheap Halloween costume you find in a grocery store.

    • Anonymous

      He skeeves me out in a Mr. Shu kind of way.

    • Anonymous

      It’s hard to judge when the groom is prettier than the bride.

      I say 4/10 on both. 

    • Anonymous

      I don’t really like the three-piece suit without a tie. It bugs me. His hair is really bad. When I worked at a music magazine, my boss had similar hair. He was an aging rocker & producer who was trying to look young. Sadly the hair color really aged him. So happy when he gave that up.

      I don’t like Paquin’s dress at all. It looks really cheap. Fit and proportion are good, though.

    • http://www.facebook.com/sorana.tarmu Sorana Tarmu

      With that ugly hairline and unflattering skull shape, she should never wear her hair swept back (and teased, apparently; I pray to God that the hair is teased, otherwise she’s one step away from Frankenstein’s fiancee).

    • Anonymous

      That dress is mind-bogglingly bad, and there’s a total bobble-head effect going on with her hair like that. Yes, she’s adorable and will pretty much always look cute no matter what she’s wearing (as long as it fits her, which is debatable in this instance given the poor coverage in the bottom chest area…though it looks that way on the model too, so I guess it might be intentional…?), but even she can’t save this one. At the same time, though, I can’t stop looking at it (I really like that shade of purple), so it’s at least kind of interesting looking…Hmmm: maybe her cuteness factor CAN (partially) save the dress! Still, I think 8/10 is really pushing it. 6 at MOST, in my opinion. He actually looks better/more well rested than usual, but I agree that his hair is soooo the worst ever.

    • MilaXX

      Bless your hearts, you were downright kind.
      He: That shoe polish hair is a hot, crazy, funky mess and he needs a shave badly. The suit is okay. I could overlook the hem if it was not for that HAIR! 4/10
      Her: She need a touch more lipstick, but I really hate that dress. That sheer piece with purple tinsel is not the business. Even sadder is the fact that it looks better on her than on the model and it’s still ugly as sin. 5/10
      I feel like these two should be smoking hot together and yet they bore me to tears.
      4.5/10

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MN3NQ262BP3YF2RQJ4DYQQBDMA Shalia

      I’m sorry but she loses at least 5 points for the exceptionally tacky underboob, IMO.  Out for both.

    • Anonymous

      they look to me like tiny little angry people.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_4Q7I33JAWBVXN6VI7DE2VAS7SA Zoeygirl65

      He’s a full on Monet.

    • Anonymous

      I don’t mind his hair color, per se.  I don’t like that it so obviously is colored because of the whiskerage he’s sporting.  If he’d shaved I would have thought he looked handsome.  She always is pretty, but I hate that dress.  It makes me sad because there are so many other things she’d look beautiful in.  Meh.    

    • http://twitter.com/MaggieHilliard Maggie Hilliard

      You’re giving her, in *that* dress, an 8/10? Wow. You must REALLY be distracted by his hair.

    • Glen Coleson

      hmm can’t decide whether that dress is risque, or just vulgar.The copious… underboob?…. sub-cleavage? –what do you call that?– Is making me lean towards vulgar.

    • http://twitter.com/HanorahSV Hanorah Vanni

      WHY IS HIS HAIR RED

    • margaret meyers

      She is looking old here.  What’s up with all the kids?  Bristol Palin looks about 35 lately.  Kate Winslet looks 10 years older than she is.  That girl who Spielberg fired is in her early 20s and looks like she’s 40 trying to look 25.  Bake Lively, Lindsey Lohan.  All of them are looking so tired and old.

      And he is laughable with his grand daddy whiskers and his Ronnie Reagan Chestnut hair.  Not looking hot.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Shaylea-Mckay/55002756 Shaylea Mckay

      I can’t take the hair, either!  You guys had me really laughing on this one.  She always looks strange at these things.  She needs to let her hair down and lighten up her makeup and her mood.

    • Anonymous

      Argh. The dress has a decent silhouette and neckline (I am a sucker for square necklines, yeah.) It could have been ok! But then they had to make it “interesting” by sewing in mosquito netting and purple garland onto it? I wonder what she liked about it?

      OH! And his hair! Are men also susceptible to the born-a-brunette-but-wish-I-were-a-redhead thing?

    • http://joansbooks.blogspot.com/ lilithcat

      He needs to a) return to whatever his natural hair color is, and b) shave.  As to the suit, he should find a tailor. 

      Her dress just looks silly.  Not to mention poorly-fitted.  We don’t need to see the bottom of her tits.
       

    • Anonymous

      her dress is weird..his hair is weird it is sort of fitting for them, no? Maybe they have such a good thing with the show they want to do that thing where they stay in character all the time…..anyway, i still like them, maybe they just need some more (gay) friends to help them out…..

    • http://profiles.google.com/amanda.leigh.albert Amanda Albert

      one word. underboob.

    • Anonymous

      Does he go to the Arnold Schwarzenegger Orangutan House of Hair Coloring?

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Richard-Harris/729969026 Richard Harris

      NOO!! Oversized pipe-cleaners will never be in! 

    • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

      Oh. God. Bad. Don’t even know where to start. So. Bad. But jesus, that HAIR. You always comment on his hair but this has got to be the worst it’s been. Shave, for the love of pete, SHAVE THE GREY BEARD, you’re just making it worse!!!

      • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

        And are you kidding me with that dress?? I’m with the minions, you are being far too generous. And I love Miss Anna dearly. But this is so bad. 

    • Anonymous

      Why does that dress exist?

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_UDBCEX7F43LCBKPOIVVVLQVILE Mary Nau

      I think the bottom of her tits hanging out is gross.  Her eye makeup is too harsh.

    • http://profiles.google.com/thisiscelia Celia

      Have you seen the pictures of her hair from the side? You are missing out on one hell of an alien beehive!

      Hate the dress on her, it looks like it was designed by a seventh-grader. The sheer panelling and trim looks cheap and tacky, the shape does nothing for her figure, the shoes are clunky and boring. Both their hair colors are awful, so at least they match. I would give her a 4/10 and him a 5/10.

    • http://www.facebook.com/Nestor.Chocolato NesTtor Chocolato

      WTF  she loooks horrible 

    • Robyn Morelli

      whatevs – the dress is HAWT

      except for the little underboob peekaboo…

    • Anonymous

      The color is terrible, but the cut is just as bad.  Horrid.  Him showing off his stubble only shoes you the carpet doesn’t match the drapes…

    • Anonymous

      I was so mesmerized by the spare set of boobs Anna seems to have strapped around her body (I guess you should have extra in case you run out) that I didn’t notice the underboob. It just gets worse the longer I look at that dress.

    • Amanda in Austin

      Her dress is hiddy.  And I didn’t even notice his hair issues until you said something, and now it’s all I see!

    • Lisa Sabatier

      I actually prefer his hair to that hideous dress of hers. 

    • http://www.joannao.blogspot.com JoannaOC

      To make up for the Beel hair, may we please have some shots of Askars in his blue suit? pretty please? because he does know how to wear a suit.

    • Anonymous

      The dress isn’t bad…I don’t care for anything about the panel, but the overall shape is fine and w/o the panel the dress would be boring.  I like that it’s a bit shorter than the runway version.  I don’t mind the hair and the make-up, but I think lipstick with color would have been nice.

      He always looks smarmy to me.  Like the owner of a strip club or something.  He needs a shave.  I don’t care for the hairstyle.  I get that it’s for the role, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.  I think his score is generous.

    • Anonymous

      Um, excuse me, but that’s a double-fail on the hair front. She is working the alien robot chick from “Mars Attacks!”/Cindy McCain look. Shudder.

      And his hair is actually a tad redder and lighter that his usual Just For Men jet black.

      And I think you were being charitable about his hem.

      And, is it obvious, that although I love TB I cannot stand these two out and about?

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_N3GA2TTX752OYSKBWWXQVFM2HI katie

      hate that dress, hate the underboob that comes with it, and hate that in the first shot it looks like her boobs are in the middle of her torso. and his hair does look utterly ridiculous.

    • Tania Skevos

      Annaphen also sounds like a drug name.

    • Tania Skevos

      Annaphen also sounds like a drug name.

    • http://twitter.com/BHSushi Beverly Hills Sushi

      His orange-glow hair is only getting worse!  Especially with the gray beard.  God he looks awful.

    • http://twitter.com/wrenaria Kimmy Hescock

      Way too generous with the lady. The dress is horrible. The only thing good in her outfit is her makeup.

    • Mariah J

      I can see bottom boob, which is much worse than side boob. I think he just likes to promote True Blood year round, I mean, what else has he done? Seriously, I don’t know.

    • http://www.facebook.com/raweiser Rachel Weiser

      The sparkly pipe cleaners running down her side are truly unfortunate. Did a six-year-old girl embellish her dress?

    • Anonymous

      He just looks like a large chipmunk fell asleep on his head
      cracking up for real here!

      I think you’re being too generous with the scores. Anyone whose hair is comparable to a sleeping rodent is not worthy of anything over a 4

    • http://soyeahsoblog.blogspot.com April and Maya

      I don’t agree with the 8/10 for Anna.  That dress is stripper wear.  It’s tacky and I hate it.

    • http://profiles.google.com/sauchih Sau-Chih Feng

      I think that dress looks better on Anna than it does on the model. Since it sort of exposes her midriff, it really does look better on something with curves.