Christina Aguilera is on the cover of the July issue of W magazine, made up like Lady Gaga circa 2009, for some reason.
W Magazine July 2011 Issue
By Lynn Hirschberg
Photographs by Daniele Duella & Iango Henzi
Styled by Giovanna Battaglia
Hair by Luigi Murenu for John Frieda
Makeup by Tom Pecheux for Estée Lauder
It’s not a bad shot, though. We don’t love this look for her but anything is an improvement over her normal look of lacquered hair, orange skin, and ten pounds of makeup stuffed in a dress two sizes too small. But we’re concerned…
On the tumultuous set of Burlesque: “There was a lot of incestuous energy in that movie, and it was very hard to be in the center of all that. A lot was riding on the film, and I bore the brunt. I was like, ‘Hey, stop fighting—this is my career.’”
On the National Anthem fiasco: ““Everything on the field at the Super Bowl was vividly bright, and I was having a moment. I got lost in the emotion of being there and I messed up the lyrics to the song. I knew the press would glom onto it. I went to dinner after the Super Bowl with Matt and I laughed about how I’d made myself into a Trivial Pursuit question: ‘In 2011 what female singer flubbed the lyrics to the national anthem?’”
On nearly falling to the ground during a tribute to Aretha Franklin at the Grammys: “I know what everyone was saying and during that Grammy moment, when I nearly collapsed, I was thinking, Are you kidding me? I’ve always been really good with my heels. Even pregnant, I could perform in heels. Note to self: Never wear a train onstage. My heel got caught in my train, and if it wasn’t for Jennifer Hudson, who picked me up as I went down, I would have fallen to the floor. When it happened, it was just like, What else, God?! What else?! I threw my hands up in the air and started smiling, because what else could go wrong?”
Aw, she sounds so downbeat and defensive, poor thing. We’ll take off our bitchpants and slip into our “wholesome, supportive gay” clothes for the rest of this post.
Like we said, this is not a look we’d recommend, but Xtina, sweetie, look how interesting you look! And we totally don’t mean “interesting” as euphemism for anything! We mean that, on top of showcasing your naturally pretty features, this stripped-down (sometimes literally) look gives you an inner life and makes you look like you might have something to say as an artist. The aging burlesque star looks you favor only make you look shallow and desperate to hold on to your looks and youth, when – and this is the important part – HONEY, YOU STILL HAVE YOUR LOOKS AND YOUTH. You also have talent. Now get yourself a good stylist – and we’re gonna break from tradition here and strongly recommend a female one, because you’ve been shooting for “fierce” and missing for too long when what you need is someone to help you express your inner self better – and the two of you sit down and figure out a way to make a pretty 30-year-old with a great set of pipes and a successful career actually look like one instead of someone decades past their prime.
There. That was sort of nice and supportive, wasn’t it?