Darlings, it was the 2011 BET Awards held (judging by the light) in the middle of a desert at high noon. Seriously, all these ladies look like they’re blinded. And some of them look like their blindness retroactively extended back to when they chose their outfits. OH NO WE DIDN’T!
Hit it, sisters!
Alicia Keys in Dolce & Gabbana
Love the shoes, but the rest of it is pure office manager. You’re Alicia Keys in Dolce & Gabbana, for crying out loud. Step it up.
Interesting treatment at the shoulder and neckline, but the rest of the dress is too shiny and bridesmaidy.
Jesus, Mary, and Oprah, we’re stunned into silence. We draw the line at lace bell-bottoms. Actually, we drew the line several miles above it.
A very pretty dress ruined by very hooker shoes.
If she didn’t have that magenta hair, we’re not so sure this would have worked with her coloring. It’s an interesting dress, but it’s a shame the shoes are so dull.
Pretty, but more of a pool party look than a red (or green) carpet one.
[learn_more caption=”Click for more red carpet looks”] Estelle
Poor Estelle. Here she is in a pretty dress and she’s melting into a puddle right before our eyes. Either that, or she’s wearing a dress that should have been hemmed for her.
Yow. All credit to her for bringing the fierceness, but it’s kind of a tacky fierceness. Eve, you are so much more fabulous than this. And your shoes look like they were made out of tissue boxes.
Simple, but a woman of color can’t go wrong with a basic white gown. If this had been styled wrong, it could have gone bridal, but she did it just right.
The shoes are a little Payless (seriously, girls: what’s with the shoes?), but the dress is fabulous.
Kelly Rowland in Notte by Marchesa
Gorgeous. Stunning color on her. And the shoes are pretty killa.
We adore her because she switches up her look every time she goes out, but we’re afraid “T.G.I. Fridays hostess in 1989” is our least favorite so far.
Kerry Washington in Michael Kors
Great color on her, but she seems to be swimming in the dress and the shoes, while fabulous, wouldn’t have been our first choice.
Oh, sweetie. We just want to give you a hug. And then we want to shake you and yell at you to snap out of it. We were going to write a dissertation about dressing for larger girls until we realized she’s not a larger girl. She just looks like one in this big, blousey, silly putty-colored bedsheet. What’s with the sad sash? And who laced your shoes, honey? Because they clearly hate you.
Crazy, but kind of fab. We would have toned down the shoes, though.
Sweetie, invest in a full-length mirror. And a bitchy queen to tell you what the mirror won’t.
Michelle Williams in BCBG Max Azria
The more we look at the dress, the more we really like it for being interesting and looking effortless. The robot shoes, on the other hand, have GOT to go.
Nicki, are you depressed? Because this outfit is the least cracktastic thing we’ve seen from you in … well, ever. And that’s saying something considering you look like you fit right in with those inexplicable mushrooms behind you.
The only way this dress works is if the wearer has his penis duct-taped to his taint and RuPaul is at the end of the runway making bitchy comments.
Horizontal bands of lace, broken up by illusion netting, with a tight, floor length, multi-tiered skirt. That’s … something, all right. The designer should be standing forlornly in a spotlight next to her while Heidi says “I’m sorry, but that means you’re out,” and Michael and Nina hide behind their scorecards, trying desperately not to laugh.
We hate lace – especially colored lace – and we hate rompers, but somehow we don’t really hate this as much as we should. Don’t get us wrong; we hate it, but we find ourselves what-iffing it. What if that was a skirt? What if she kept the color -which looks great on her – but lost the lace? What if she wore a bra? We’re spending too much time on it, but we’re not dismissing it outright. There’s a germ of a good idea here, but unfortunately, it’s not coupled with good taste.
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[Photo Credit: Getty]
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