Oprah’s been saying goodbye for months, but she ramped up the goodbyes for her final week and since the lady has a terrible fashion history, bless her, we thought we’d give her a hand for wearing something we like.
Oprah, honey. We just don’t get you. It seems to us that a woman who has had as many gown disasters as you – not to mention as many opportunities to wear gowns – would have figured out a long time ago what silhouettes, styles and proportions work the best for you. But no. We’ve watched her show up at various awards shows and red carpet events over the years strapped into something that never fits correctly and in which she never looks comfortable. It always frustrated the hell out of us. So we have to ask now, Oprah, why have you not worn this exact silhouette and style for the last 15 years (not counting the times you starved yourself down to a smaller size)?
Normally, when she’s wearing a gown, Oprah opts for these gigantic confections; big poofy skirts that look like they weigh 40 pounds and a corseted bodice that cuts off her air supply and forces her boobs so far up and out that they look like they’re trying to escape. This, on the other hand, looks fantastic on her. And it proves once again that the best way to dress a body of size is to wear something that fits it well. We don’t think Oprah has lost an ounce of weight in ages (and we don’t think she should), but this dress takes a couple dozen pounds off her instantly. She still has uni-boob, but we suspect that’s a bra issue rather than a dress issue. The only element we’re not sure about are the turquoise flowers, but that’s only because we’re not keen on that eggplant paired with turquoise. Otherwise, she looks great. Love the shoes, girl. Now go have this dress taken apart and replicated in every color of the rainbow. Let us never see you in giant quinceanera skirts again.
[Photo Credit: getty, wireimage]
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2011 FiFi Awards