Pairs Division: Pattinson and Witherspoon

Posted on May 04, 2011

Darlings, it’s time to check in on the happiest co-workers in show biz!

Robert Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon at the UK premiere of “Water for Elephants.”

Reese is wearing a Stella McCartney dress, Lorraine Schwartz earrings and Christian Louboutin shoes. Robert Pattinson is wearing a Dries Van Noten suit.

Could that smile be any more frozen and locked into place, we ask you?

 

 

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She: Well, this is a huge improvement over that pin cushion dress the other day. Clearly, Reese read the opinions of the T Lo minions and immediately set about slapping people who work for her. The message had been sent loud and clear: Dress me in clothes that fit me, fools! We mostly like this dress. The view from the back is pretty amazing, even for these two ‘mos. It fits great and it’s a great color on her. We just hatehatehate the “oops, I just can’t keep my straps up” feature. Put in straps that work or go strapless, but these limp little things are silly. You’re not Liz and this isn’t Butterfield 8. Still, it’s the only complaint. Hair and makeup look great and believe it or not, we think nude shoes were the only way to go here. Besides, the Band-Aid is endearing. Score: 9/10.

He: Well, there’s not a lot to critique. This is his go-to look (when he’s bathed, that is) and he wears it well. The slim cut of the suit (which he favors) looks great on him and young men should wear slim cuts for as long as they can get away with it. We don’t even mind the dark shirt, which normally looks mafia to us. Truth be told, it still looks a little mafia, but he’s like, the least threatening human male you can find, so it’s fine. Yes, everything is just a bit too rumpled and wrinkled, but that was almost surely deliberate. From head to toe, this is how the public expects him to look when he gets dressed up. He’s giving them what they want. Score: 8/10

Combined Score: 8.5/10. That seems awfully high, considering they’re not even all that dressed up. But it’s not about wearing the most expensive outfit; it’s about wearing the outfit that suits you the best. Aside from some minor quibbles, there’s almost nothing we’d change here.

[Photo Credit: getty, wireimage]

    • MilaXX

      must be the sinus meds, cause other than those stupid straps on her dress I have no complaints. Your score seems fair

    • Anonymous

      She looks cute. The shoes would be better in a contrast color. I can’t tell much about him, except he needs a shave.

    • http://profiles.google.com/diana.ruskin Diana Ruskin

      See I think her dress, despite being perfect in terms of color, is too tight, and is unflattering on her (actually) tiny midsection. I think her hair looks a little too puffy and voluminous also.

      • Momzilla

        I agree. The dress is riding up a bit on her hips because it is too tight in the tummy and backside. There’s fabric rucking at her waist in the front and the back. She looks great, but they needed to let the seams out a bit in the skirt.

    • GoRing

      Golly, TLo, I must respectfully disagree about the fit of Reese’s dress – I think it looks terribly unflattering from the front (and other angles). It’s tight across the tummy, her hips look square-ish and it does absolutely nothing to enhance her bosom area. However, you’re correct about the back view – very attractive. Love the new format, BTW!

    • lolaleen

      She looks a lot…I don’t know…”softer” than normal. Starting the rumor mill now…is she pregnant?

      • Brook

        She totally looks preggo!

        • http://twitter.com/AnnaPBrittain APB

          Totally looks like baby bloat to me.

    • ailsieengland

      The spelling in the link for this is coming up “whisterpoon”. For some reason I am finding this hilarious…

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-TallGirl-Freeman/1043623567 Jessica TallGirl Freeman

      I think the dress is too tight as well, and you said the view from the back was great, but there is a whole lot of “this doesn’t fit so it bunched at the zipper where it rode up over my bum” look going on here. And in the stomach area it’s actually overlapping in some shots and you can tell its too tight across the thighs. The top looks like a bustier in blue satin and the skirt is too tight. And those dang straps annoy me to no end! And with all that being said…its still better than last week. I do love the color!

    • Nick

      While that dress is an awesome, I’m not loving it on her. It looks a little too tight to me… Her body just looks kinda awkward.

    • Anonymous

      Reese…looks really good this time. What a difference a dress makes. I completely agree about the straps. I’m a bit bothered with the cut of the mid section/stomach area…almost looks like built in abs…lol…but really accentuates her tummy. Completely agree, also, with the rear view…Bam! Way to accentuate the positive girl! 8.5/10

      Him…ick. Boring and unoriginal. The scruff is also not working. 5/10

      combined 6.75/10

    • Addis R. Pérez

      Although the shade of blue is beautiful, I do not like either the shape or fit of the dress on her. As it’s been pointed out already, it’s just too tight around her midsection; the shape is unflattering and unbalanced. I love nude-colored shoes and I think the pairing here of the shoes with the dress does work, but aren’t they a little big? Also, didn’t Team TLO blast Reese in their previous post for going Amish when it came to jewelry? Not a word was said here!

    • Oli

      I disagree about RP- The jacket fit is off and there is no excuse for that hair.

    • Anonymous

      I love the color, but the fit is just awful. It’s way too tight across her midsection and the fabric is especially strained on her hips. And I will never cotton to the nude shoe trend.

    • Anonymous

      For some reason I love that she’s not wearing colored toenail polish and that she has a Band Aid on her foot. :)

    • Anonymous

      Do not like the shoes. Would have gone with silver.

    • Anonymous

      Do not like the shoes. I would go with silver.

    • Viv

      tom and lorenzo! hello :) after using your site for a few days i thought i’d comment on the functionality of the new design – i don’t really hv an opinion on how the site looks, as long as it works, but i hv to say this redesign has made your site alot harder to read both at my work microsoft comp and my home macbook laptop.

      it’s reeeally slow and laggy on the work comp (i think it’s the feature that makes the boxes drop down a little that holds it up), to the point where i don’t visit from work anymore (much as i’d love to) bc it’s too much of a pain in the ass – and now when i hv a spare second at home on my macbook i’ve realised i can’t do my usual command + click to open links in a new tab (it just doesn’t work for some reason) and instead i hv to do command + click + select “open in new window”, then click outside of the dropped down box to make it go back up again so i can click on other links.

      all up, the new site design is really cramping the ease of enjoyment of the site that the old design allowed – your content is still awesome of course (don’t stop!) bt just thought i’d let you know abt the probs i’m having accessing it.

      • Badriyadances

        Along these same lines, the script on the main page that puts the tags on the individual entries gives IE conniptions on my work computer. It runs, but it does slow things down. (I do like the overall design though now that I’m getting used to it!)

        • Badriyadances

          Also, between those straps, his rumpled suit and their general forced air they look like they had an I hate you f*ck in the limo on the way over and now just want to get the h*ll out of there.

        • meow kitten

          Same here, plus I keep getting a message that running the script will slow things down and it certainly does. Just FYI.

          Love the redesign, though, especially the gallery feature.

        • Momzilla

          I had the same problem at home and at work: script running… slowing your computer…stop running? It is gone today, so thanks for that IT guys.

      • Mac

        I have no problem using command+click on my macbook using the latest update of firefox.

    • http://profiles.google.com/kbryna kbryna frogboots

      I don’t love the nude shoes, but that’s personal taste not a real objection. You really think her hair looks perfect? I think it looks like it needs a comb run through it. Limp and vaguely tangled, like she’s coming home at the end of a long day at the office. He’s fine, I guess, though I object to his presence generally. The bodice on her dress seems a smidge too low – not too revealing, it just seems like her boobs should start higher up on her body or something. HATE the floppy straps. Question about the break in his trousers – in the top photo, his trousers seem sort of bunched or folded funny – they aren’t puddling, but there seems to be excess length. Or is that just how guy trousers work? I am not expert on the mysterious ways of men’s clothing.

    • Loling

      The hate these two have for each other really comes through in this interview: http://youtu.be/46eSF68fVJc. Could she be any more tight-assed?

      • Anonymous

        The youtube link only works if you take the period off the end. http://youtu.be/46eSF68fVJc

        I suffered through that…must say I didn’t see any “hate.” They giggled all the way through and had a playful banter. I doubt either of them enjoy doing that type of publicity interview thing…but I think they made the best of it. She does seem somewhat pretentious though.

        I kind of dislike each…him more so. I wanted to see some darts/daggers/claws/something…but didn’t. Sorry.

        • Loling

          To me it was strained as hell, Reese with clenched teeth subbing for a smile and staring at Pattinson in disbelief every time he went off into one of his weird tangents. Totally Tracy Flick forced to spend time with a stoner.

    • Anonymous

      Could she stand any further away from him while “posing”? I mean I thought this woman was a better actress!

      I hate the straps, but they both look great, so I agree with your combined score.

    • Anonymous

      I agree about the straps, but otherwise she looks great. With him, I’m not crazy about this suit, and despite his smoldering good looks, I don’t think the scruff works or him.

      And btw, I love this new feature that allows us to scroll through more pictures.

      –GothamTomato

      GothamTomato.etsy.com

    • Anonymous

      I agree with everybody! She looks good, her dress does look a tad tight (but they wear them that way, don’t they) the droopy strap effect is irritating. He looks on the good end of how he usually looks, I’d subtract a point for the scruff, but that’s personal preference and I know it’s the style.

      To me her face says: “Smile. Smile. It’s a job. You can go home in 3 hours. Oh, there’s so-and-so, Smile, wave. Sigh. (SMILE) Why can’t I have a grown up for a co-star? (SMILE) Smile. Turn. Put some sparkle in it, girl. Oh, yeah, look at the boy, SMILE! He’s so boring. Sigh. Smile. Smile. 2 hours 45 minutes . . . “

    • Nancy

      You boys are being way too generous about this dress. It doesn’t fit across the tummy bulge and is not at all flattering in the boob area. And then there is the matter of the straps. I do like the color, and I like her hair this way.

    • Candigirl1968

      Those straps are horrid. Worth a 2 point deduction.

    • Anonny

      Is he really wearing a navy blue suit with a black shirt/tie? Or is it just my eyes?

      I’m not loving that.

    • TheGirlInTheAfternoon

      Wow, I have to totally disagree. I think this dress is horrible on her. The color is great, and, as you said, the view from the back is beautiful – but the front view is not great AT ALL. I’m shocked to think that he looks better than her – and I don’t usually think he looks even okay.

    • Karliln

      I’ve got to agree with most of the comments here. She looks like she’s stuffed into that dress. The dress is pretty and the color is lovely, but it just doesn’t work as is. It needs to be a size or so larger and those straps need to be fixed. And I just can’t have an opinion on nude shoes anymore. Every star them, but I just find them so dreadfully boring, they almost ruin the outfit every time I see them. But I guess they’re not quite so bad with this dress.

    • Anon E. Mouse

      It’s a pretty dress but way too tight across her stomach. Makes her look fat.

    • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

      YOWCH! Damage control after their last (uncomfortable) RC pairing. I can’t get past those stupid, stupid straps.

    • southern kitten

      She looks like she wants to rip off his balls and shove them down his throat, bless his heart.

    • MC

      I also hate hate hate the flimsy straps. It throws the proportions off the whole look.

    • Liz

      Is it just me or does she look like she’s ready to run screaming as soon as the cameras stop flashing? All I get from the pictures is a Please-Don’t-Let-Him-Touch-Me vibe.

    • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.parker Sara Parker

      I’m going to swim against the tide here, and disagree with my fellow bitter kittens (the dress is a skosh tight, but I still think she looks killa), as well as TLo (RPatz looks terrible, I would have given him a 2).
      His shirt is the same color as, but doesn’t quite match, his wrinkly suit, and the stubble over his super-pale skin makes him look like he’s confused about whether Twilight is over or not.
      I also would have knocked a point off of their composite score for lack of chemistry: you people are selling a romantic movie, so SELL IT for cripes sake.

      ~ An Extra-Bitter Kitten Who Has 150 Midterms to Grade, and Is Not Feeling Generous with Points

      • Momzilla

        I’m with you. Pattinson needs to shave, get a haircut, stop using mousse and have someone tend to his eyebrows. He is not at ll well-groomed or well-dressed. And he is creepy pale and needs to get some sun.

    • http://profiles.google.com/casamuels Christina Samuels

      Liz, it’s not

    • Janicemuah

      loathe the silly straps, they remind me of the ones you have to cut out of dresses since you never actually use them to hang the thing…it’s also too snug across her midsection, actually makes her look somewhat thick which is likely genetically impossible in her case…he always looks like he needs a nap, a bath and a transfusion….

    • Guestie

      Wow, you guys seem unusually kind this morning. Or maybe I’m unusually grumpy. To me, it looks like her dress is pulling across her abdomen, and I don’t like the underwear-quality of the top half. His blacks don’t match and look wrinkled. I say they’re both out (though I do love the color of the dress.)

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1050504936 Therese Bohn

      I just want to pull up her straps! Hope her foot boo-boo is better.

    • Christina

      Okay, obvously I don’t understand the new posting system. All i was going to say was, Liz, it’s not just you getting that vibe.

    • Anonymous

      There is something about the waistline of Reese’s dress that is bothering me. It’s like it won’t lay flat? And the straps. Yucka. But I am a sucker for that color.

      He’s an idiot. What’s that on his face? Stubble…uneven, ‘I’ve got a skin condition’, stubble.

    • Llou13

      I think he looks like Lurch.

    • CPK

      I am really not liking what I am seeing of Stella McCartney at the moment. I cannot understand the rush to wear her stuff

    • Michelle

      9/10? Seriously? It makes her hips looks huge, and her tummy look pregnant. I like the color, but for the life of me, I can’t figure out why she went out in public looking like this. Did she look in the mirror and think, “You know, I feel like looking fat and starting some pregnancy rumors today.”? Because that’s the only reason for this. Oh, and she’s got melting boobs. I can’t believe you missed the melting boobs.

    • Judy_J

      I also hatehatehate the droopy strap look. I like the color and fit of the rest of this dress, though, and her hair and makeup are flawless. She’s a spokesperson for Avon…wonder if she uses their products exclusively? He looks just as creepy and repugnant as he always does. Ick.

    • Becca

      I don’t think the fit is good at all on her. She looks like she was poured into it and the zipper might break if she tries to sit down. Look, Reese isn’t a heavy girl; not even close. So why does this dress make her look 15 pounds heavier than she is?

    • Saanriotwisted

      I actually think this dress makes her look a little too thick around the middle. It is a wonderful color for her and it does look great from the back (with the exception of the “straps”), but the boning is all messy and from the front, it looks more to me like she is just wearing a corseted slip — too lingerie. Her makeup is good, but her hair could have used a little product to control the flyaway frizziness she has going on.

      As far as he goes… I can barely look at the suit because the stubble on his face is giving me Miami Vice flashbacks. It is called a shave, and he needs one, ASAP. Also, while I adore black, and think everyone needs enough black to wear to a funeral in their wardrobe, he should have gone with a different color for the tie, because that is where he looks like he is going — a funeral.

    • Anonymous

      I think Reese looks fabulous, droopy straps and some pulling at stomach notwithstanding. I would give him a lower score–hate that all black.

    • http://www.facebook.com/petra.burkhalter Petra Burkhalter

      Hi TLo. Love your blog. I just wanted to say, I feel I’ve learned so much about the do’s and don’ts of fashion. I dress very alternatively on a day to day basis but I can’t help but giggle to myself when a girl has all matching accessories or dude’s legs are melting. I was wondering if you will ever do a series of posts just about style? I know you all don’t wanna be considered gods and the end-all,be-all experts on fashion (though we all think of you as such anyway), and fashion is very contextual and contradictory at times, but a post on say, fit in men’s suits or how to pick the right sized purse for your dress as purely tips everyone should know would be awesome.

    • http://profiles.google.com/meredith.piatt Meredith Piatt

      I’m sorry, but those straps are just plain silly (and distracting) on an otherwise pretty dress…or I think it’s pretty…am too disstrapted…

    • Leah E-H

      Why does everyone wear shoes that don’t fit? It’s weird! I agree on the straps.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1326120071 Gaby Ripoll

      Personally, I find the blue suit with the black shirt and tie headache-inducing, but that’s just me.

    • http://www.facebook.com/izzzyy Dixie Murphy Ross

      I actually loathe this dress. Even without the straps, the bodice seems ill fitting and, dare I say it, makes her girls look… less than stellar.

      And he’s just boring. Then again, most guys in RC fashion are, because, as you’ve said, the ladies have to do the heavy lifting.

      I’d say 6/10, but maybe that’s just because I am so sick of seeing the same thing over and over again in general, not just on them.

    • Anonymous

      It’s so obvious that she finds him repugnant. She looks adorable, though.

    • http://twitter.com/AnnaPBrittain APB

      Her dress is a little tight from the waist down. She’s a tiny woman, it takes a TIGHT dress to make someone her size look pooge-y! Also, hate the sleeves.

    • anon

      HATE HATE HATE that dress. Also, you boys are unbelievably generous when it comes to Reese.

    • Keegan

      The straps are distracting and the front panel makes the top of the dress look like a uterus.

    • Christine Marie

      Bitch, please. They look like they’re going to prom together and did it really fast in the limo on the way there. Ick.

      Even that aside, though, I feel like she needs at least another point off for the awful straps. They’re distracting.

    • http://twitter.com/margo8461 Marguerite

      No huge disagreement here. Love the color of the dress. Think its fab from behind. Also dislike falling down straps, but at least everything stays in place when straps droop unlike poor Rumer Willis yesterday whose breasts and dress both sagged right along with the strap. My beef: I just personally do not like the corset style dress and think it unflattering on pretty much all but the tallest, thinnest of models. She is a tiny thing. Why wear a dress that looks tight around waist and triggers pregnancy rumors when maybe just some bloat or trapped gas that no one would notice in different style? But agree she looks great otherwise.

    • Carolyn

      I love her hair! She looks fresh and young. Plus, thanks for the picture scrolling feature. Very nice!

    • Megan

      I agree about the straps. Hate them. Otherwise, she looks great. She just looks so unhappy to be standing next to him. Her smile looks completely forced. Poor girl. He looks as good as is possible for him. They look like they hate each other.

    • Me

      don’t know about you , but all I saw was a baby bump. Congratulations!!!

    • Adam

      The only thing that I take issue with Robert is the jacket seems a skotch too tight. The buttoned button is tugging much of the jacket.

    • Joyce

      Reese in this Stella McCartney dress looks pregnant. The throw away straps ARE ridiculous. The color is beautiful on her though. RPatz always looks disheveled to me.

    • Fata Morgana

      I’m glad I’m not the only one who was charmed by the band-aid!

    • Margot

      Did you ever think that Reese could be a *gasp* insane Twilight mom who told Robert to star with her in this movie and play her love interest or else she would ruin his career? That’s my theory for this movie, anyways. This is borderline pedophilia, Reese.

    • Barbarienne

      Someone needs to explain to him that the scruffy look only works if you have a respectable, even beard. His face looks like moldy Wonder Bread.

      “…he’s like, the least threatening human male you can find”: sorry, no. He’s creepy looking. He looks like the sort of guy who has rohypnol in his pocket.

      Agree with you on Reese’s straps, esp. given how the dress appears to be edging southward. I fear she’s about to suffer a wardrobe malfunction; proper straps would go a long way toward alleviating that look. Also agree with you on how awesome the color is.

    • http://profiles.google.com/fionna13 Cassandra McCraw

      He has at “my Mother made me take my cousin to the prom” face. Or maybe it is “I hope these people don’t think I pulled her straps down.”

    • jzzy55

      she looks nice and he looks nice. agree about the pointless straplettes. but I still hate “nude” shoes.

    • http://profiles.google.com/mochizukisan kyasarin mochizuki

      Hate the nude shoes. Hate the straps. The color’s good on her, though, and the fit’s good (I guess?), but the hatehatehate I feel towards the shoes and straps-suffering-an-existential-crisis knock this down a lot further for me than a 9/10…more like 6/10. That’s how much I hate those shoes and pointless fucking straps. Oh, and I don’t like the way the neckline makes her boobs look like early-stage pregnancy boobs that aren’t entirely sure they’re friends anymore. I guess that explains my 6. Maybe. Her hair is making me a little sad to boot.

      I need RPatt to go away, but I suppose, for what he is, this is passable: 6/10. (He needs to be Silkwood-ed, shaved, and smacked around a bit, Fight Club-style, but I guess he’s sorta-kinda pulling this tired look off.)

      God, I’m being so much meaner than you. I’m a terrible person. This kitten is especially bitter today.

    • http://profiles.google.com/mochizukisan kyasarin mochizuki

      Hate the nude shoes. Hate the straps. The color’s good on her, though, and the fit’s good (I guess?), but the hatehatehate I feel towards the shoes and straps-suffering-an-existential-crisis knock this down a lot further for me than a 9/10…more like 6/10. That’s how much I hate those shoes and pointless fucking straps. Oh, and I don’t like the way the neckline makes her boobs look like early-stage pregnancy boobs that aren’t entirely sure they’re friends anymore. I guess that explains my 6. Maybe. Her hair is making me a little sad to boot.

      I need RPatt to go away, but I suppose, for what he is, this is passable: 6/10. (He needs to be Silkwood-ed, shaved, and smacked around a bit, Fight Club-style, but I guess he’s sorta-kinda pulling this tired look off.)

      God, I’m being so much meaner than you. I’m a terrible person. This kitten is especially bitter today.